You like a man at work – consider the essence

Do you like your colleague at work: to be or not to be

The situation when you like a man – colleague at work – a very common phenomenon. Yes, you are bound by the business atmosphere and the commonality of work interests. But over time, a man ceases to perceive the team only as co-workers. We begin to read and understand the emotions of those with whom we work side by side.

This creates an emotional connection that may grow into something more. And now you try as if by chance to meet a colleague is not just at the water cooler. It becomes apparent that you like a man – a colleague at work. What to do in this situation?

Pros and cons of an office romance

Office romance has both pros and cons. Let’s first consider the positives:

Daily meeting. It will definitely not give cause for jealousy and will strengthen trust between lovers. You and your coworker spend most of the day at work. It follows that he will not have time for romances with others.

A woman has an incentive and a desire to look every day in a special way beautiful: to look after yourself, change your outfits and hairstyles. People around her will never see her in a bad image and will not understand how many hours she slept today and how tired she is. Taking care of herself plays an important role and speaks volumes.

Motivation and a good attitude from morning till night. Thoughts of meeting a male colleague will make you come in early to have time to socialize longer. Against the background of feelings there is no desire to leave the office as soon as possible or not to show up there at all. Hiking to work gives endless pleasure and brings a smile to your face.

Those who work together, have a high efficiency factor and a sea of new ideas. This yields its fruits at corporate events, gives a charge of energy and a good result of the tasks. To work together as a couple and to feel comfort on both sides is even more pleasant.

The prospect of building a strong family. It is common in large companies to welcome and support a marriage between colleagues who met at work. Because the couple know how to act cohesively and know exactly how to perform tasks well and quickly.

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In addition, a man at work vividly demonstrates his character traits, habits and manners. And if his colleague likes him, she has a better chance to recognize the minuses that people usually try to hide.

What are the disadvantages of an office romance:

Following the principle “happiness loves silence” will not work. The interest of colleagues in the relationship of lovers is always heightened, so hiding is not an option. Sooner or later, everyone will know about the office romance and will not leave either party unattended. The couple may be disliked and belittled. It is necessary to treat this calmly and not to take the barbs personally.

Aggressive behavior, envy and resentment of others. This happens because many people do not have joy in life and people who truly love. Avoid such a development is possible if you limit yourself to a minimal display of affection in public. In this way, you will not cause negative emotions in colleagues and detach yourself from other people’s opinions.

The negative impact of personal relationships on the work process. You may experience a decline in strength and performance, which will affect your career. Crazy desire to spend time with a male colleague and communicate more on non-work matters is normal, but wrong. And it can happen at any time if you do not control yourself. So know how to separate the two aspects, and then working together will be effective.

A painful breakup. No one is immune from this, but in the case of an office romance to restore composure takes a lot of time and willpower. After all, always see a familiar face, which can no longer be called family, it is incredibly difficult. In addition, stress may be exacerbated by gossip, invented stories of colleagues, and sometimes a forced change of employment – because the bosses are often ruthless and reproachful attitude to the situation. According to statistics, such couples survive the breakup very difficult. It is important to make it clear that nothing will break you, and prove that you are a professional in your field.

Changing relationships with co-workers. Your employer may perceive a workplace romance as not the best idea for their company. Therefore, it is better to refrain from sudden outbursts of infatuation and manifestations of feelings in the workplace. Limit your communication with your lover to the professional sphere only.

Options for communication with a man – a colleague at work, who likes

If, after weighing the pros and cons of the office romance, you still decide that you want a romantic relationship with a colleague you like a man, you can act, but the strategy is still better to choose taking into account your marital status.

You are married or he is married (or both have families).

When you like a married man – a colleague at work, you should not panic, and act reasonably.

If one party has a family, keep your affair private and do not give a reason for discussion. Do not tell your friends about your feelings, because you can not know what kind of reaction and consequences then expect.

Communication during work is strictly business and only on a professional level. Do not go over to a personal relationship. Do not write to him on social networks and do not call him.

If you are convinced that this is your man, and you want to tie your life to him, then be brave. And if you don’t have full confidence in the correctness of your actions – stop the relationship immediately. Otherwise, the experience you will remember with pain and sadness.

Be reasonable and smart, make a decision with the benefits for both sides. The best option may be to go to another company. Because your secret will be known immediately. You won’t be able to hide and remove it from the memory of your colleagues.

It’s important to understand and talk to your colleague about the difference between sympathy and falling in love with signs of attention. Offer to go somewhere, for example to a coffee shop, and discuss your feelings. If you do not notice an adequate response from a man – a colleague who likes you, then do not torture yourself or your partner. Especially if you are married. It is better to think about what to do not to lose your job and improve relations in his family.

You are both free.

If you’re single and you want to have a loving relationship at work, remember, you’re not the only one who might like a male colleague. Observe your surroundings and be careful how you show emotion. Don’t strive to give away your secrets, think a hundred times lest you regret it. If you have an unhealthy relationship with a colleague, you may be in trouble because of an office romance. Keep your relationship with your lover a secret until you are ready to share the news of the wedding with your coworkers.

Plan of action to attract the attention of a male colleague

Try to find common ground with those with whom he interacts for a long time – and you will be able to find the right approach to dating. Look for every possible way to gather information about him, and then it will be easier for you to start a dialogue.

Once you’ve met him, try to keep in touch: you can offer to help with something or you can ask for help yourself. Discuss current topics over a cup of coffee or do a homework project together, exchange contacts for further communication.

It is desirable to find out about mutual sympathy. If the feelings are mutual, be patient. Over time, you sense exactly whether this is your man or not, whether he is ready to continue to communicate and whether he likes you.

In conversations with a male colleague pay attention to his manner of speaking, hand movements, gaze, think about whether he is interested in your life, whether he asks questions.

You can ask directly about the relationship and analyze his answer: ambiguous or clearly negative. This will help you dot all the i’s in a relationship with a colleague you like.

Situations where both have warm feelings, but are in no hurry to openly admit them, are common. Here it all depends on your characters and desire to be with each other. Do not be afraid to start a dialogue and do not doubt yourself. If you feel the moment is right, turn on your feminine charms, start flirting, and the dialogue itself will turn into something else. Do not be ashamed of such moments and be bolder in showing yourself.

If you get a vague answer from a male colleague, write him a note or make an appointment. Take a break from work problems and talk about lively topics. This way you won’t give the impression that you like him, but just start the conversation on a pleasant note. You can have a conversation about anything: how was the day, what his plans for the future and what goals in life.

Your happiness is in your hands. If interest in you has not appeared, then stop and stop giving signs of attention. Do not think about the man more than twice a day, then you will be easier to get rid of feelings of infatuation. The best way is to occupy yourself: find a hobby, meet with friends and aim to meet a new favorite.

In no case do not panic if your actions do not work. Wait a while, and maybe he wants to share his emotions with you.

What to do if a male colleague is indifferent

Indifference can sometimes break a person, especially in the case of strong love and affection. Unrequited feelings are a frequent problem. The main thing is not to fixate on your chosen one and not to deceive yourself for the sake of a dubious desire to see each other one last time. Ignore your impulse and control your actions. You can go with your head into work and get a promotion to be transferred to another department or another location in the city. This will kill two birds with one stone: you will not be distracted by extraneous matters, get other responsibilities and get to know the new team. Another good way to forget someone is to ask your friends not to remind you of them or ask too many questions.

If you find it very difficult to see the person you like every day, consider changing locations and the team as a whole. And if you’re very attached to your place of work, try swapping shifts or offices with a co-worker if possible. Start a new phase of life and discover new opportunities: playing sports, keeping social media accounts, going to exhibitions and meeting interesting people. A love affair usually goes away after a few months. You will be surprised that after a while you will stop remembering this person.

Listen to your heart, do not be afraid to commit those acts that you think unrealistic. Choose your enemy correctly and preferably an unmarried man.

Lovely girls! You are beautiful and sure to find your soul mate, and if you responded to the indifference, now you know how to cope with it.

Like a man at work: what to do and how to deal with it?

You have to write in such a way that you can’t help but be read. I think I have the magic of words.

The expert – Margarita Lopukhova

Family psychologist. For eight years I save “family units” from collapse. I help couples regain love and understanding.

Successful relationships between already established colleagues is quite rare. But this does not mean that you have to wait for a fiasco. Simply, to build a relationship with a man from work is somewhat more difficult. Like a man at work, what to do? Before you jump into action, you need to understand for yourself, do you need this relationship? At work, the affair affects the most negative. In a situation, if you break up, you will have to work side by side with a former lover. As if such a situation would not provoke a change of job. But if you understand that you are aimed at more than just flirting and a temporary relationship, then it is worth to take action.

  • 1 Changing Roles
  • 2 Talk to me
  • 3 Outside of work hours
  • 4 Divide and conquer
  • 5 Romance and society

Role reversal

A relationship with a man from work is difficult to start because he already has an opinion of you. You know each other, but you only know each other in the business sphere, so he perceives you as an employee. Do you remember how at school we did not think of the boys in the same class as boys? The guys from parallel classes are another thing… The same situation happens in work. This needs to be changed, to show a man that you are a girl, to make him pay attention to you. For this purpose, a change of image, makeup or suddenly wearing a blouse with a deep neckline will do. If your stilettos and loose hair, instead of a bun and a dull blazer, will talk about your colleagues, the cherished man will also pay attention.

But this attraction is only external, it will pay attention to you, but do not make a man seriously think about a relationship with you. This is where the second stage begins.

Talk to Me

Employees can work together for many years, but never know anything about their personal lives. This makes them faceless in each other’s eyes. It is necessary to begin a smooth transition from purely working topics to more personal ones. Of course, this should not be done spontaneously. Unexpected questioning about the well-being of his parents or Friday nights out with friends will just scare away a man, leave him feeling confused. Like a man at work what to do? Try to unobtrusively weave information about yourself into your work communication and try to learn about him. Find a common topic of conversation and approach him with it during the break. But make it as natural as possible.

Outside of work hours.

If your communication has been going on for a while and is going quite well, you should try to take things outside of the office. Tell him about the exhibition you wanted to visit or the premiere of the movie you were going to go to. Give him a reason to invite you to spend time with him outside of work. If at first he did not understand the hint – repeat. With particularly shy is to show your own initiative, but this is rather an exception to the rule.

Divide and conquer.

Your relationship can be wonderful, you can even live together, but do not flaunt it at work. Mixing work and love rarely ends well. Even if coworkers know about your relationship, make a habit of turning on employee mode when you come into the office. That way you avoid unnecessary fights with your man and you won’t be constantly distracted.

The affair and society

Relationships at work affect this very work anyway. But there are a few rules that can help reduce the risk of losing your reputation or even your job:

  • Try not to have an affair with your boss. You will get a lot of benefits from an affair, as long as it is there. But if it ends – the boss may well fire you.

When starting an office romance, you should always be aware of its purpose. If it’s just an affair – the game is not worth the candle. The fact that real relationships at work are different from those that are shown in the movies. Colleagues are more sarcastic, bosses are in no hurry to congratulate the lovers, and the work or relationship suffers from this. Only start a relationship if you’re sure you’re serious.

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