What to do if someone survives at work?

What to do if they try to survive from work: a conspiracy in the team

Hello dear readers. You will be interested in this article, if they are trying to get you out of work. You will learn how the dislike of colleagues can manifest itself, for what reasons this happens. You will know how to act in such a situation.

Signs

The presence of such manifestations may indicate that bullying has begun:

  • You are not informed of important information;
  • You are not assigned serious tasks;
  • You are subjected to frequent criticism;
  • Successes and achievements go unnoticed;
  • You hear ridicule regularly;
  • You feel a clear conspiracy, colleagues are constantly gossiping behind your back.

Who is harassed more often than others

There is a category of people who are disliked by colleagues and bosses more often than others. This is due to their character, behavior and type of temperament.

    This is a person who has a difficult life.
  1. A complex person, unsure of his abilities.
  2. The person who wants to stand out from the gray masses.
  3. A kiss-ass who wants to be a boss’ pet.
  4. Personality that is unsociable, naturally moody.
  5. Unconventional behavior.

Reasons

  1. Colleagues envy your talent, appearance.
  2. Employees inadequately perceive the style of your clothes.
  3. You repel people by the way you talk or your behavior.
  4. You have been chosen as a weak link. Someone is having fun in this way, setting colleagues against you.
  5. The desire of the person to achieve great success, when the rest of the employees are just floating along – can be perceived negatively.
  6. Competition. A person may be outed if he or she is a threat to someone’s position or hope for promotion.

How to Behave

If you are being forced out of your job, what to do becomes a major question. I suggest that you listen to the valuable advice of experts and make your own conclusions.

  1. Be patient.
  2. Cut off all bullying. If you don’t say anything at once, it may begin to endless bullying.
  3. Stop trusting your secrets to people around you.
  4. If you suspect a particular person of being the mastermind behind the bullying, you can check him out by telling him some information.
  5. Try to understand the situation. Analyze your actions. If necessary, talk to the staff, try to figure out the reason for such treatment of yourself. Perhaps you really offended someone or acted unkindly.
  6. It is important to show that you are not afraid of anyone. Stay confident in your abilities.
  7. Just in case, think of a plan of retreat, start looking for another job.
  8. If the situation is very complicated, try to save a certain amount of money, so that in case of dismissal you won’t be broke.
  9. Identify the instigator. Find leverage on the offender. Identify in the team of people who may be brothers in misfortune or feel that it is unfair to your person. Get their support.
  10. Do not brag – this could cause jealousy of colleagues.
  11. Try to enlist the support of an unspoken leader in the team, but do not use flattery.
  12. Keep your mouth shut, don’t discuss or gossip behind colleagues’ backs.
  13. Do not show negative emotions if you are reprimanded.
  14. If you see that you are guilty of such attitude of your colleagues, try to change.
  15. If you know you are still inexperienced and have struggled to get a job there, it is best to be patient and try to stay with the company for at least a year.
  16. If the salary level is holding you back, try to find a similar place with the same income. If there are options with a slightly lower salary, it may be worth accepting such an offer, rather than continuing to waste your energy and ruin your nerves.
  17. If you work for a large company, try to transfer to another department.

If the boss is driving you out of your job.

This situation can also happen. For what reasons can it happen?

  1. Disrespectful attitude.
  2. Emphasizing that the employee has better experience than he or she has.
  3. The employee openly states that he or she claims to be the boss.
  4. The employee criticizes his or her boss by gossiping about him or her.
  5. Inadequate behavior.
  6. The employee fails to cope with his duties.
  7. Causes disgust on a physiological level.
  8. The employee reminds the boss of a person who previously betrayed him or riddled with nerves.
  9. The refusal to be intimate with the boss may also provoke an attempt to get rid of an employee.

How to be in such a situation?

  1. Make sure that you are right and able to stand up to the boss. Be prepared for the fact that you will face misunderstanding from employees.
  2. Follow the chain of command.
  3. Identify the instigator. Chances are the boss’s attitude has changed under someone else’s influence. When you identify that person, try to find dirt on him or expose him.
  4. Consider whether the boss is really prejudiced against you, or perhaps you really do not cope with their job duties.
  5. Believe in your strength, stop worrying about every single thing, do not be afraid of losing your job because of your misconduct.
  6. Under the law no one has the right to expel you, if you can cope as a specialist with their responsibilities. Another thing is that there can be intrigues behind your back, your colleagues can set you up on the instructions of your boss, accusing you of all your faults. And then there will be a legitimate reason to get rid of an employee who does not work well.
  7. Even if you see that the question of your dismissal is already decided, still keep normal relations in the team and with the chief, treat him with respect.

Now you know how to behave if you survive at work. Analyze the situation and make sure that you are not to blame for this attitude. Try to cope with the bullying, start to resist the attacks of your colleagues. If you see that there is no other way out, quit, but find a new job beforehand.

Inadequate People: Conflicts and Abuse at Work

Corporate wisdom “come to the company, and leave the manager,” usually comes down to the fact that at work there are so difficult, unpleasant and conflictual relationships that it is no longer possible to tolerate them. The hh.ru research service conducted a survey on conflicts and abusive relationships at work – this article analyzes the results and compiles tips on what to do if you find yourself in such a situation.

⏱ Time to read – 8 minutes

The study found that harsh treatment at work is unfortunately not uncommon:

Yet 11% had experienced abusive behavior from co-workers only, 44% had experienced abusive behavior from supervisors only, and 13% had experienced abusive behavior from both co-workers and supervisors.

The survey was conducted October 22-27, 2020 among 6,463 job seekers (including 3,116 employed and 3,070 non-employed but formerly employed).

Analysis by industry showed that the only exceptions were the civil service, NGOs, and the beginning of a career: there the percentage of those who did not experience abusive behavior at work was higher than those who did. True, the difference is not great – only 2-3%.

The survey was conducted October 22-27, 2020 among 6,463 job seekers (including 3,116 employed and 3,070 non-employed but formerly employed).

The top three “leaders” among harsh attitudes were job devaluation, disdain and arrogance, higher-pitched talk, boorishness and rudeness:

The survey was conducted October 22-27, 2020 among 6,463 job seekers (including 3,116 employed and 3,070 non-employed but formerly employed).

The majority of respondents preferred to solve conflict situations on their own, but a significant percentage of respondents could not find a way out of the situation and simply quit.

The survey was conducted October 22-27, 2020 among 6,463 job seekers (including 3,116 employed and 3,070 non-employed but formerly employed).

Workplace conflicts and abusive behavior from co-workers and supervisors are emotionally charged, challenging situations that are difficult to respond to with a “cool head.” We asked Anastasia Zheludkova, psychologist and author of the project prosto_psy, to comment on typical problematic scenarios and give advice on how to get out of them without damaging yourself or your career. And, if possible, not to encounter them again.

Situation: a conflict with the boss

Alena lives in a small town and works as an accountant at a well-known and stable company. But about six months ago the chief accountant, on whose team Alena worked, left. A new person took her place, with her own rules and approaches to processes. Alena complains that she often receives orders verbally or by phone, and when the task is done, she suddenly finds out that the manager had other things in mind.

Psychologist’s recommendation:

“If a supervisor in business communication chooses non-ecological manipulation – transitions to personality, impulsive outbursts – it indicates his underdeveloped emotional intelligence and flexible skills. For subordinate employees, this situation will be uncomfortable, as the manager will regularly take advantage of his superior position and not restrain his manifestations. This can ultimately lead not only to a worsening of the atmosphere in the team – the self-esteem and performance of subordinates will suffer – but also to burnout of employees due to constant emotional tension and stress, or even to public conflicts and scandalous dismissals.

What I would recommend to Alena: develop your own emotional intelligence, learn to work with manipulation and build professional boundaries, getting out from under the influence of the “inadequate management style. To try to bring the relationship with the manager into a clear business communication. If unsuccessful, it is still better to change the company.

Situation: an unfriendly team

Svetlana recently came out of maternity leave and found out that the department in which she worked had changed a lot. Some left on their own, some “left.” But she came back with the idea that she had to work, to adjust. And things were going well at first.

Psychologist’s Recommendation :

“This situation is similar to an underlying competitive struggle between colleagues with a shadow leader. It is a common story in women’s teams. But to confirm this hypothesis you need to delicately find out information from your colleagues and supervisor. And if it is confirmed, go into an open dialogue with the colleague in front of the boss.

I would recommend that Svetlana work on self-esteem, a healthy ego, and open confrontation and competition skills. Learn to see passive aggression in communication and be able to respond to it, to conflict ecologically, and to protect your professional image.

Unresolved such a situation can hit Svetlana’s self-esteem, devaluation of her professional skills, deterioration of relations with colleagues and her own involuntary departure.

Situation: under pressure from the client

Sergei managed the project for about a year. During this time the client changed the project manager. A person with government service experience came in with the express purpose of showing off and proving himself. He became arrogant and “lordly” when talking to Sergei and would not let us work in peace. The time came when we had to sign an act of work for several million rubles. The client’s representative said: “You’ll work for me for two more months and then I’ll sign the statements. Although all the work within the project was done and the project team had finished their business trips there were no objective reasons not to sign the papers.

Sergey is at a loss: one does not want to quarrel and clash, but without this, it seems, the situation cannot be solved. And he is also afraid of losing a client, because they have been working with this company for many years.

Psychologist’s recommendation:

“Sergey has well traced the psychological aspects and motivation in the behavior of the client, who at the expense of his position is trying to increase the importance, using manipulation and pressure to demonstrate power. But in this case, the emotional conflict will only exacerbate the situation and the client will increase the pressure to indicate “who is in charge.

I would recommend that Sergei work on self-confidence and self-regulation in negotiations, learn to turn off his emotions and not let himself get drawn into manipulation. Conduct an open, diplomatic, cold-blooded dialogue with the client. With justification and reinforcement of all initial agreements, facts and involving the whole team of the client.”

How to resolve conflicts at work

  1. If you find yourself in a difficult situation at work, before you clarify the relationship, argue, prove your point, contact a helping expert – a psychologist, a coach, a career counselor. The fact is that the vivid emotions that you experience at a time of conflict sometimes prevent you from making informed and conscious decisions. As a result, the conflict is not only not resolved, but even worse.
  2. In difficult communications remain polite and neutral. The fact is that the opponent may deliberately lead you to emotion. If some questions put you on the spot or drag you into an argument, take a pause. “You know, you’re asking me a tough question. Let me check the information and get back to you with an answer.”
  3. Never discuss third parties in these situations. Otherwise it could be used against you in the future.

One last piece of advice: If you have a difficult situation at work and all your attempts to solve it fall apart, think about who you can involve as a mediator.

One of my clients,” says Anastasia Zheludkova, psychologist and author of the project prosto_psy, “suffered from attacks from the new manager for several months. He saw her as a competitor and made every effort to “squeeze” her out of the company. She communicated with him in an emphatically polite manner. She checked her reports ten times before sending them in. She offered ideas and help, but all she got were sarcastic remarks. She could not simply leave, both for financial reasons (she had a sizeable mortgage) and because of her attachment to the company. At one point she shared her troubles with the head of the neighboring department – they worked together a lot, and on some issues he even became her mentor. Suddenly he suggested that she transfer to him. He took care of all the arrangements for her transfer.

I really hope that you are one of those people for whom the abusive relationship is only a topic of an article at hh.ru. And if you are still in a similar situation, do not give up, and look for a way out.

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