What’s important in a relationship when you really love
The question of what is important in a relationship is answered differently by men and women. Although, we must admit, and in the answers of the same sex are a lot of differences. Somebody cares about comfort at home, for some relationships are impossible without a sense of protection … And someone does not imagine a couple without regular and varied sex.
And if everyone’s concept of “importance” is so different, it turns out that nothing important in the relationship and can not be? Actually, that’s not true. We prioritize what we were deprived of in the previous union. There are times when a person was deprived of something as a child, and therefore seeks it so persistently in an adult relationship. So what really matters?
What is important in a relationship for men and for women
Relationships between men and women can only be harmonious if both partners believe that they are comfortable with each other. Obviously, everyone should recognize that he does not want to be alone. Only such a formula gives a chance to be happy. Let’s break down what matters most in a relationship between the sexes and why.
We are all different, so it is impossible to define clear criteria. But there are some standards that almost all members of the weaker sex strive for. According to most women, a partner should be:
Reliable. For every girl, confidence in the future is a special value, so they tend to choose those men who can guarantee stability in the relationship, ready to prove that they can fight for their chosen one, take responsibility for both.
Caring, loving. All women are emotional, so their choice more often falls on those representatives of the stronger sex who are not shy to express their feelings. In addition, for girls in a relationship, it is important that the man was able to care for and take part in the life of his chosen one.
A professional in his chosen field. For women, the status and experience of a man is important. It is not so important who he works, it is important how well he knows his profession.
Gallant. Every girl is pleased to hear compliments, so they feel that they are loved, admired.
All of the above criteria are what is important in a relationship for women.
The inner world of a representative of the stronger sex is noticeably different from that of a woman. Let’s see what is important for a guy in a relationship. There is no place for stereotypes, but at the same time, men’s values are very similar to women’s values. Below is a list of principles that are traditionally the most significant for the stronger half:
Man strives to be the main thing in the relationship. It is important to him that his chosen one hears him and agrees with him.
The girl should trust the man, give him freedom of action.
A man has his own habits of life and he wants his chosen one to respect them. He is unlikely to want to change for a woman.
Men do not tolerate rebukes, he appreciates support, understanding and listening.
A man wants to be a hero for his beloved, if she believes in him, he will protect and defend, will move mountains for her. It is really important to him that the girl does not hide her admiration in the relationship.
Comparisons with other men are unacceptable to him. He wants to be special and the only one.
A girl’s excessive demandingness tends to stress a man out. He himself will do everything that is required of him. The main thing is to feel that all his efforts are appreciated.
The girl should not invade the personal space of his chosen one. The more freedom he is given, the more he appreciates his other half.
A man is always ready for experiments in bed, so a girl should not be shy.
More often than not, a man chooses calm and sensible girls as his soulmate. The ability to be supportive is especially valuable for him.
He understands like no one else that fidelity is important in a relationship between a man and a woman.
The companion should look after herself, have good taste.
It is important for a man that even after years of the relationship, there are flirtations and mysteries between the partners.
This is what is important for a man in a relationship with a woman. As you can see, the list of requirements is much longer than the female, but it does not mean that he is categorical. It also happens that the chosen one is the exact opposite of the ideal.
List of 15 things that are very important in a relationship
To understand how to build a life together, it is necessary to understand what is important in a relationship between people in terms of psychology.
1. Friendship and understanding.
Many of us believe that support and understanding are the most valuable things in a relationship. Obviously, everyone wants to have a supportive, strong shoulder nearby. We are not only looking for support in a difficult time, we need those with whom we can share the joy.
Good relationships are of particular value to us, because a partner is not just someone who lives nearby, it’s someone who helps, supports, encourages with a kind word. Such relationships are built on trust, love and complete mutual understanding.
But it happens otherwise. Not all of us know how to build a strong and good relationships. And some people do not need it at all. There are categories of people who believe that the basis of the union is self-interest. The main feature that a partner in such a case should possess is the ability to meet their needs. As a rule, strong relationships are not important to such people, for them it is more valuable to have a benefit.
Such relationships can be surely called unhealthy. If you need a partner in order to give you some material (and not only) benefits, then you are wrong about something. A partner is someone who first of all gives emotions, makes you happy and appreciates what you are.
2. common goals and desires.
Often couples are able to maintain a relationship for a long time due to full compatibility in bed. But it’s not enough. Different priorities in life, values and goals often break even seemingly strong families. Hardly any of you would argue that this is very important in a relationship.
Of course, no one is saying that the inner worlds of man and woman must be an exact copy of each other. You can be interested in completely different things. But to determine your compatibility, imagine each other in ten years. Do you have much in common?
Author and facilitator of women’s trainings to harmonize women’s energy. Master of removal of limiting beliefs and master of the settlements.
I have prepared for you three lessons that will help you better understand yourself, remove the restrictions that prevent you to feel loved and live happily.
Video lesson with meditation: The 5 states of femininity
You will learn about the five feminine states that exist in every woman, how they manifest and which archetypes you have the most manifested and which are not developed.
Video lesson + meditation: How to let go of a past relationship
Telling you what you need to do to free your heart from old feelings, and break the energy threads that bind you to your past partner.
Audio Recording: Love Yourself Neuro Affirmation
Thanks to this neuro-affirmation you will be able to return love for yourself and feel sincere gratitude and happiness for each of your day.
15 signs of a right relationship
We spend too much time talking about how to recognize someone who isn’t built for a stable relationship. That said, it’s important to realize that the signs of identifying this type of person are actually many.
First, I believe that we need to be clear for ourselves about who we want, and when we find such a person, we should immediately know that it is him or her. Secondly, each of us should have our own image of the ideal relationship, determine for ourselves what we need to do to make it so, and move together with our partner in that direction.
So today, instead of discussing bad relationships, let’s talk about what an ideal relationship should be:
- You respect each other’s differences and use them to your advantage. The best analogy to use here, in my opinion, is a sports analogy. Every team has participants with different abilities. Some have better pitching, others have better running speed, but with cohesion you really get the best results. It’s the same in relationships. Both partners must understand that each has strengths that the other does not, and only in unity can you complement each other. Only in your unity does the team always win.
- You argue. No, not often, and not harshly. But if there is a dispute between you, it means that each of you has its own opinion, while you have enough power to argue your position. And that’s great! Lack of argument can only indicate a possible secrecy of feelings, the lack of 100% honesty in expressing their views. Silence and restraint of their emotions in order to maintain peace often leads to misunderstanding and even a breakdown in relations.
- Going head over heels. Relationships are not measured in time periods. Either you’re in a relationship or there’s nothing between you. Ideally, both partners should fully commit to their relationship, strengthening it with the trials of life and working to create a unified team.
- You stop hiding your flaws. Perfect people don’t exist. If you deliberately hide flaws, play an unusual role for himself, put on a mask in front of a partner, he will not be able to discover your true nature. Normal relationships are built on openness. If there are feelings between you, you will be loved and appreciated along with all the flaws and shortcomings.
- You discuss the topic of sex. Communication is the key to building a happy, healthy relationship. Intimate subject should be discussed in the first place, because satisfaction should be experienced by both partners. Understand, you between adults who love each other should not be forbidden topics.
- You know how to be silent together. Have you ever been in the same room and enjoy the silence? There is no awkwardness, you feel good together, you only enjoy each other’s company. It is so important to be together in silence sometimes.
- You retain your individuality. Let’s go back to the sports analogy of the first point. If you are constantly trying to pitch like a pitcher, you gradually lose your role on the team as you try to resemble the other player. It’s the same in relationships. You must understand that in any relationship, you must remain yourself. You don’t have to assimilate anyone, you don’t have to become a victim of the situation. Unnecessary self-sacrifice will turn you into a “rag”. You will not become happier, and moreover do not dare to tell your partner that you want more.
- You respect each other’s privacy. Yes, you – the team, one unit, you live under the motto: “All mine are yours, all yours are mine. That’s fine. But do not forget that you are also two different people, each of which has a right to some privacy that deserves respect. That doesn’t mean spying on each other or looking at phone messages. The exception is when a good reason has been given to do so. Otherwise, don’t abuse trust and your relationship will be perfect.
- You trust each other. Trust is the foundation of every relationship. Without trust, you won’t be able to safely let your partner go out to meet friends or even go to work. Such a relationship will gradually crumble until you break up.
- Lack of forbidden topics. It is not uncommon for misunderstandings to arise between people living together that require discussion. If you avoid difficult conversations, so as not to offend a loved one, this will lead to unnecessary unspoken, will lead to tension in your relationship. Try to calmly and respectfully explain your position and feelings.
- You accept each other’s past. Everyone has a past. When discovering a person you must respect and understand their past. By refusing to listen to your loved one’s life story, you are showing your unwillingness to accept them as they were and are now. In a normal relationship should be open to all topics for discussion. It is important to understand that only the present is important, and the past will forever remain only in the past.
- You support each other in everything. Regardless of whether you share each other’s aspirations, it’s important to provide support in all endeavors. Caring for your loved one is manifested in this. In this case, you can just be around and help in any way possible to achieve the goal. After all, your partner’s happiness depends on it.
- You continue to support and strengthen your relationship even after a long period of cohabitation. True relationships do not require giving for receiving, they are built on the principle of “give and give back”. It is very important to accept and appreciate what you receive in a relationship, and it is even more important to give the same amount of attention and care to your partner. Stopping to use this principle dooms the relationship to failure.
- You are always open, honest and direct with each other. Open and honest communication within each other’s understanding is the key to a successful and promising relationship.
- You want to improve without losing your individuality. This is a clear sign of a healthy relationship. No one should be allowed to change themselves. You have to want to, you must have a motive to improve, as personally, so I for my partner.
As Mark Twain said, “Stay away from people who try to degrade your ambition. Little people always do that, unlike the really great ones, who can make you feel that you too can become such a person.”