What does a guy need in a relationship?

7 things men really need in a relationship

You’ll know your lover’s face from a thousand, know how his eyes light up when he’s happy, know how to touch him when he needs your support, and how to overcome conflicts and life’s troubles together.


If you learned to love the “women’s” novels and television series, it may seem that love must necessarily be exposed, that men must recognize it without fail in public, with a fall on one knee, a ring in an elegant box, an orchestra outside your apartment, singing serenades and other attributes of the soap opera or romantic comedy.

But in real life, love isn’t like that, is it? You know it yourself, no matter how many romantic comedies you’ve seen in your life.

In real life, love is about recognizing your loved one’s face out of a thousand, knowing how their eyes light up when they’re happy, knowing how to touch them when they need your support or want you madly, and knowing how to overcome conflicts and life’s troubles together.

Whether you’re happily married or you’ve just started dating, if you’ve got a really good man, he deserves to be just as happy as you are. And if that’s what you want, then:

1. Compliment him.

For some strange reason most modern people think that only women like it when they are told that they look great, smell nice, are very smart, or, say, look incredibly sexy. But…do they really?

Almost all my life I have been convinced that men, by their very nature, are much more confident in their looks and sex appeal than women. Yes, you probably know this collective image of “real man”, who practically does not care what he wears, as long as it covers his nakedness, and who cuts his hair with an axe, so that it does not stick in his eyes – and I do not care how they look.

So… if you think the same way and think men don’t care about their looks, that’s bullshit! Having talked to guys in my adult life, I can confidently say that I have never yet met a man who didn’t care at all if he seemed attractive to a woman he liked. So when you think your man is particularly handsome and hot today, don’t be silent. He likes getting compliments from you too.

It’s actually quite simple: tell him nice things when they come to your mind. Tell him that he looks very masculine and brutal when he puts on his old “rocker” leather jacket and frayed jeans. Tell him you go crazy for the smell of his cologne when he hugs you. Do not hold back!

2. Tell him that you really appreciate what he does for you and your family.

If your partner’s job requires him to get up early every day and drive a few miles away from home, let him know that you appreciate what he’s doing. Even if he loves his job, I guarantee you that there are still days when he’s seriously thinking about quitting, yelling at his boss, or just hiding somewhere in a back room and sitting there quietly so no one can find him. But he doesn’t. And one of the reasons he doesn’t do it is because of you and your family.

In a certain respect, our society is still very conservative, and despite the fact that in today’s world most often both partners work, men are still drummed into the head from childhood that they are the bread winners and it only depends on them whether there is only bread or butter and caviar on the family table. That is why their self-esteem often depends directly on what figure is written in the payroll under their name. And if this attitude of society seems to you a little one-sided, then, believe me, if you do not realize how much pressure sometimes our men are under, and do not appreciate the efforts they make, it makes them feel even worse.

And even if your partner is not working, but, say, doing housework and taking care of children, he also sacrifices a lot for your family. Even if he likes to babysit, and he gets a genuine pleasure out of it, all parents from time to time have the desire to throw a white flag, to yell at everyone or hide in the closet. But he doesn’t! He selflessly throws himself on the, ahem, ambuscade, and spends his days up to his elbows in something gooey, keeping an eye on the kids, and not losing his temper even when they turn the whole house upside down.

It’s really quite simple: tell him regularly that you know exactly how hard and challenging his job is. Tell him that you really appreciate the sacrifices he makes for his family, and that you see him working hard to make your future brighter and happier. It’s not even about the money – yours or his – but about recognizing what society tends to take for granted (as part of the “man’s due” list).

3. Set aside time regularly to “rock out” with him in bed.

Chances are, he’s not capable of hours-long sexual marathons of the kind you sometimes see in porn movies and that we, getting all hot and bothered, read about in “women’s novels. But guess what? The best intimacy in the world is the intimacy between two people who love each other. It helps us soar to the very heavens, and feel as if you’ve reached into each other’s very soul, and connected on a hitherto unreachable level-so let sex always be special and hot for you. Both for you and for him. If you make him feel as if he were your own personal sexual deity, he will surely return the favor, and it will make your life together much happier.

Sure, the concept of “marital duty” little by little goes into oblivion, and, in my opinion, it’s great, but a healthy relationship can not hurt the same healthy mutual attraction to each other. And if you find it difficult to fully open up and relax at home (whether it’s because of the kids, fatigue at work, or because you’re tired of your home walls to the point of “I don’t want to”), try closing the two of you in a hotel room and hang a “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door.

Well, if it’s so far beyond your family budget, it’s quite possible that even a tent somewhere in the deep woods will be enough for you. And even if you don’t have a chance to go out yet, you can add some zest to your sex life by talking to each other about your fantasies (and bringing a couple of them to life), or, say, by watching some videos from PornHub together.

You can also take some candid erotic photos, and send them to your partner from time to time. Don’t want to take completely nude photos or are you afraid someone else will see them? Take erotic, but discreet and imaginative photos. A bra strap that has slipped down from your shoulder, a panty edge peeking out from under a pair of jeans on your thigh… In a word, it’s all in your imagination.

In fact, it’s quite simple: maintain your desire for him. Dream about him, think about those sleepless and hot nights that you spent together, and what it is in his body that you like the most. And when you fill your mind with desire to the brim, pour that desire out entirely on him when you have a chance to be together and enjoy each other.

4. Support his desire to do something alone sometimes.

To be honest, for me personally, this point was probably the most difficult. I don’t know why, but when Ivan and I first started living together, I just hated how much time he spent without me surfing or mountain biking. Both he and I worked a lot at the time, all we had left to spend time together were evenings and weekends, and I felt like he was neglecting me for his toys.

By doing so, I was putting a lot of pressure on my husband, and frankly, it wasn’t very fair to him. Over time, we learned how to properly allocate our free time, I realized that I shouldn’t resent him for these hobbies, and in turn began to take advantage of his willingness to support my desire to spend an evening at the gym, over my journal, or, say, just a book in bed at any time.

It’s actually a good thing that some of your free time is spent apart (unless, of course, he gets so caught up in his hobbies that you disappear from his list of priorities altogether)! If you’re worried about him spending the evening somewhere else, ask him when he’s going to be back and, if it’s not too late, plan something together for the rest of the evening. Spending time away from each other can give you more topics to discuss, and if he uses that time to exercise or meditate, it can also help him be happier and healthier.

It’s actually quite simple: when he tells you that he needs to do something on his own that makes him happy, smile and wish him good luck and kiss him afterwards. This will help him understand that you support him wholeheartedly and are not angry with him at all.

5. When you are together, put your phone away.

I repent, I am often as guilty of this transgression as anyone else around me. There is always another email to answer, another text message from a friend, another social media feed to browse. I understand the temptation is great… and yet, you need to put that beckoning screen object aside and finally see the man sitting next to you.

When I realize that I am once again stuck in this vicious circle, I try to take a deep breath, and think soberly about what the risks are if I just ignore all the messages coming to my phone while we are together. Well, I mean, in the event of a matter of life or death, my husband will certainly understand, and he won’t resent the fact that I need to make a few phone calls and send a dozen messages, but most other things… they can well wait.

And I realize that once I put my phone aside, I begin to really see the man I once bound my life to and love madly. I see his beautiful face, gentle hands, and I realize how stupid it was to spend my time not on him, but on some soulless iron.

Make a simple pact with your partner – if during your time together one of you need to stick in the phone for something important, let your significant other know about it – just a few words. “The server is down, we need to get it up right away,” or, say, “Our babysitter is calling” are perfectly worthy reasons to interrupt communication for a while, but let your partner know that you are not doing this because you have become bored with him, and that you will try to solve everything as quickly as possible.

It’s really simple: be really there for the person you love. And don’t trade communicating with him for communicating with your smartphone screen.

6. When you take something for yourself, take something for him as well.

To be honest, I borrowed this tip straight from James Sama, but it’s very useful advice, and it’s very easy to follow!

Going for coffee at your favorite coffee shop? Get him his favorite latte or cappuccino! Going to the kitchen to whip up yourself a hot ham and cheese sandwich? Offer to make one for him, too!

It’s not at all about how much money I spend on this gift, it’s about the fact that I then have the opportunity to say to him, “Listen, I was walking by the surf store and remembered you and got you this there.”

It’s really simple: it only takes a few seconds to say, “I’m going to the kitchen to get a sandwich, can I get you something?” but it has an incredibly positive effect on your relationship.

7. Look him in the eye.

You don’t have to constantly devour your chosen one with a loving look – as if you’re both fifteen years old and you first got out with him on a date. Just take a few moments to catch his loving eyes, and let him know that you also love him madly.

If you, like me before, believed most of the stereotypes about men, you hardly think your man needs your loving gaze – because men are “supposed” to be stern and not particularly emotional – but… just try to do it. Look him straight in the eye, smile, and hold your gaze on him for about three seconds. By the way, this technique is a great flirting technique because it makes the person you’re looking at feel like they’re the only man in the room, even if they’re not. Yes, I realize that you’ve had a long time to “rope” this man by making him your boyfriend or husband, but he still deserves to feel special and the only man in the whole world.

It’s really simple: Look him straight in the eye. Smile. And repeat as many times as necessary.

One of the secrets of a long and happy relationship is your desire to gift your partner with many happy moments – if, of course, your partner is willing to do the same for you in return. No wonder psychologists say that marriage becomes much happier and more successful if partners treat each other with kindness and sympathy, not taking each other for granted.

Of course, following the advice collected in this article is not always easy, though I pretend it is. Sometimes they require us to be vulnerable in ways we’re not used to at all. I know exactly what you mean, because I’ve been in your shoes more than once, and I’ll probably find myself in your shoes more than once in the future. But you know what? It was worth it.

Also, ask your partner about all the little things that make him happy – I bet you do most of them anyway.

What a man needs from a woman. The 5 conditions of a man’s love.

Is there a “Perfect Formula for Feminine Behavior with a Man” and if there is, what is it?

Many people ask this question, but everything really is not complicated, and although in love affairs are all individual, you can safely highlight the five conditions, following which a woman will forever hold the heart of men. Fifteen years on the subject of intimate relationships and well versed in it, I – Andrew Ryder, I assure you that almost any man expects from his beloved:

  1. Emotional support
  2. Care and comfort
  3. Playfulness and intrigue
  4. Grooming and sex appeal
  5. His own sexual satisfaction

If a man gets all this from his chosen one, he puts her on a pedestal of Love, appreciates her and does not think about cheating. In fact, this is the ABCs of relationships. These are both the conditions for their stability and the conditions for the preservation of a man’s Love.

And since each of these conditions is important in its own way, let us examine them separately.

The emotional support of a woman for her man

A man needs respect and recognition, thereby he asserts himself, and he expects it in the first place from his beloved woman, the one who is closest to him, whom he trusts and on whom he can rely in life.

In order to live up to the expectations of your loved one, a woman needs to:

  • Demonstrate faith in her man
  • Stress his importance and exclusivity
  • Praise him at every opportunity
  • Rejoice with him in his successes
  • Support him in difficult situations
  • Empathize with him when he is not successful
  • Criticize him as little as possible

If a woman in all things support a man, empathizes with him, interested in his affairs, if it is emotionally close to him and shows responsiveness, he appreciates it. Feeling himself in her eyes the most important, the best, the most necessary, he sees her kindred spirit, and even muse. From such women rarely go.

2. Care and comfort

This condition has material and psychological components. The material component is quite clear. It means to be a caring wife and a good, diligent hostess, diligently arranging the family home. No matter how protocol it may sound, but there is no way without it. By the psychological component of comfort refers to the psychological atmosphere in the home and conflict-free relationships. Nothing destroys them so quickly as prolonged conflict. And here the woman should be the first to act as a reconciliator, she needs to be more flexible. By making compromises and playing along with a man, a wise woman skillfully smoothes out conflicts. Love nest vyet more likely it, and it defines the feeling of warmth felt by a man at home.

The presence of intrigue in a relationship and the playfulness of the woman

Love – a game, the most exciting and interesting game in life. To make sure that relationships do not become boring and boring, you need to keep the intrigue in them, and the key role here – for a woman. It is important to be herself, to be playful kitty, and do not become the perception of men familiar housewife and solid mother of his children. If she does not tease the man, does not flirt and not seduce, if it completely depends on him, predictable and completely understandable, he may pull to the side – for the game, hunting and intrigue.

4. Grooming and Sexual Attractiveness of a Woman

Fashion for “naturalness” does a disservice to sexuality, and many women over the years neglect to take care of themselves, thinking that they should be loved as they are. They relax, and in vain, no one owes them anything, these are not the times.

Of course, behind all this there is work, time, and money. But there are no other options. If a woman does not make it a habit to work on her grooming, if she allows herself to relax in this respect, let her not be surprised at the role of the house slipper, who is forgiven for being wrinkled, scuffed and shapeless, but is treated accordingly. Yes, a woman in this respect is more difficult than a man, and she has to work more on her appearance. But these are the laws of nature. A man loves with his eyes, and there’s nothing that can be done about that. Illusions in this respect are dangerous.

5. Sexual Satisfaction in a Man

Whether women like it or not, but for men there is no true love without sex. The rule “NO SEX – NO LOVE” is 100% valid here. That is a good sex with the woman he loves is the highest expression of love for men, sex is primarily strengthens it. Sensuality of relationship is not crossed out, it’s important for a man, but sex is the foundation of his love.

Understanding and accepting this, a woman can perfectly build a relationship with a man using her sexuality. And on the other hand, if a man lacks sex, the relationship will not be stable. As cynical as it sounds, the way to a man’s heart is through his balls, and it really is.

And while you may find this ending harsh, believe me, it is realistic. “What does a man need from a woman” is the question we asked ourselves, right? I have tried to answer it for you.

That said, we ended on sex for a reason, because:

  • First, it is the most fragile part of a long-term relationship
  • Secondly, it’s the most satisfying thing about happiness.
  • and thirdly, it’s the most reliable thing that connects you to a man, because of a man’s dog nature.

I have developed a special workbook for women “How to SAVE A Man’s LOVE. 10 RULES of a skillful woman and a checklist for them. As an advocate of stability in relationships, tried to clearly and concretely describe in it, what to do a woman, not allowing love to cool down.

This is a FREE, but cool book for women who value relationships and want to live in harmony, without cheating. Use it and you will be much more successful in your personal life.

If you liked the way I was thinking and this article seemed relevant, you can read my other materials on this subject. They may also be of interest to you:

If you liked my train of thought or the way I write in general, you might be interested in the FREE Methodology Book on this topic.


The 10 RULES of a Good Woman and their checklist

A FREE but cool PDF eBook-Tutorial for women who value relationships and want to live in harmony, without cheating, without letting Love get cold.

Thematic Method Book.

A FREE but cool PDF eBook-Tutorial for women who value relationships and want to live in harmony, without cheating, without letting Love get cold.


The 10 RULES of a Good Woman and their checklist

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About the Author

Andrew Ryder

You need to be creative in your attitude to life and enjoy it!

But do it with reason, and in this I can help people. – Happy personal life – stable, harmonious relationships – a vibrant intimate life you just can have it all, and I tell you how.

Author of 36 books.

Many of them have been translated into English, German and Spanish and are on sale on Amazon.

Developer of the adult game series FANTS.

Sold over 400-odd thousand games, with most buyers being regular and married couples

Author of the world’s most complete Collection of Role-playing Erotic Games

Includes 200 erotic role-playing game scripts and is listed in the Guinness Book of World Records

Author of 160 articles on relationships

Posted on various popular internet resources and read by millions of people

Author of a series of master classes, lectures and video courses

Covers the most topical issues of intimate relationships and has helped hundreds of thousands of people.

Expert and personal relationship consultant

I have been helping people build happiness in their personal lives and competently build relationships for 15 years.

I am not a psychologist, and relationship TECHNOLOGIST. In a relationship is more important literate behavior than psychology, and I teach you to build them competently. Competently, it means for your benefit.

I am a proponent of a creative approach to personal life and relationships: they need to DEVELOP you, bringing pleasure. Do you agree? Then we’re in the same boat!

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