I’m tired of living: where does fatigue come from
Everything through force. It would seem, live and rejoice, so many years ahead… I haven’t even begun to live yet! But I’m already sick of it. No strength, no desire to live. Outwardly, her life is a cause for envy. But inside is a black abyss sucking out all her strength.
“I’m tired, tired of living,” she says. On the outside, her life is a source of envy. But inside is a black abyss, sucking out all the strength.
Tired of Living: a monologue in the kitchen
You would think you should enjoy your life, there are still so many years ahead of you… I haven’t even started to live yet! And already bored. No strength, no desire to live. Like a robot, mechanically performing necessary actions. Who needs them? Why am I doing it? Who decided that I need it in the first place? Is the meaning of life to perform useless actions day after day: to go to work, run to the store, spend the money I earned on food, eat, sleep, wake up, and repeat the beaten route – home, work, store, home?
Everything is through effort. Even what is commonly referred to as pleasure, through effort in the hope of a cure. It doesn’t work. I think I was born with this fatigue. I sleep and can not sleep.
For some reason I read the advice of psychologists. It’s bullshit. It’s all bullshit. My friends say: “Get a boyfriend. Have a baby. “Have a kitty cat, after all!” What’s the point? “You gotta think positive.” Oh, come on! How much more positive can you get? We’re all going to die someday, and that’s the only thing that keeps me hopeful. And the constant prophecies about the end of the world also cheer me up.
I am trying to come to terms with myself. There is nothing to complain about. There are people who are worse off, who have really serious problems, desperate situations. But what do I care about them? I’m tired of it all! And of people! And from life! And of myself!
No, I’m not at all thinking about how to kill myself easily, or looking for ways to die quickly without pain or anything like that. I feel like there’s some special meaning to my existence. It even feels like I’m the chosen one and someone is about to appear, open a secret door in front of me, and I’ll finally wake up to my real life. Otherwise, there is no point in living.
Apathy, boredom, depression: underline.
Have you ever heard anyone you know complain about unbearable fatigue? Or maybe you yourself are tired of such a life. Sometimes it is precisely fatigue and nothing more. True, it also does not arise out of nothing. After all, when a person does what he loves, communicates with people he loves, life – in joy, and fatigue only enhances the pleasure of the subsequent rest. It’s such a pleasure – literally lie in bed after a busy day.
What’s wrong with that? Let’s understand why we find ourselves in a situation where we feel tired of life, and what to do if we’re tired of everything.
There can be many reasons to say “I’m tired of life.” Most of them can be grouped into three groups, which we will talk about in detail below:
Many people who say “I’m tired of living” mean that they are not satisfied with their current life situation. But possessors of the sound vector, for example, when asking questions about the meaning of life, often decide that there is no meaning at all and become burdensome with the very fact of a “meaningless” life. As long as we do not distinguish one state from another one hundred percent, none of the many pieces of advice will do any good. At best, we will guess by accident and hope that the next time will work, too. At worst, we will make the situation even worse.
For example, if one tries to bring a person with a sound vector out of depression by noisy fun, it may end up in an even worse condition, at least with a headache. On the other hand, those with a visual vector are more likely to feel better in noisy company.
TOMSHA: don’t wait for love, love yourself
Longing is a friend of visual vector holders. Any of them feels the flow of life only in the change of emotions, colors, moods. At the top of the emotions – euphoria or love. At the bottom – longing or sadness. Sometimes you can’t fill yourself with vivid impressions even occasionally, and you don’t have the skill or ability to give your emotions to others, to be compassionate. “No one loves me” is a faithful companion of homesickness and a feeling of weariness “from it all.
If we present a conditional scale of development of the properties of the visual vector, we will see at the very beginning a complete concentration on oneself, on one’s own experiences, fears. And the further the development goes, the more attention is paid to those around. And if at the very beginning – “I want love, love me! As the vector develops, it becomes more and more “I love! One must understand that the development of the properties of this or that vector is not a verdict or a “bad evaluation. It is not directly related to what is considered the development of the personality as a whole. Moreover, development goes on only until puberty, so we cannot control this process on our own. But we can realize the properties to the extent available. Interestingly, in a state of superstress, we can “lose” all signs of the development of properties.
So here’s the thing about longing. When we, possessors of the visual vector, cannot realize our need for a change of emotions and there is no one around to whom we can have compassion, quenching another person’s pain with love, we fall into longing. Or, when things are not yet too bad, there is unbearable boredom and weariness with life. What is meant here is this way of life, the lack of a sense of the flow of life, the lack of a change of impressions.
The most common cause of homesickness is a break in an emotional connection due to the separation or death of a loved one. In this case, any advice would be inappropriate: as long as a person does not understand the real reason for the difficult condition, the world will be out of focus. The training “System-Vector Psychology” by Yuri Burlan examines these themes in detail. When there is an awareness of one’s own desires and innate qualities, the heaviest longing transforms into light sadness – pleasant memories of happy moments associated with the one who left. This opens the way for new relationships without fear of loss.
“I began to feel like a living person. My day just explodes with emotion. I sing at the top of my lungs, then I roar, panting, then I roar like a wild horse. I am alive, I am! I slowly began to have the strength to live. To live and to do. I began to sort things out. Ugh, so many things piled up!”
“I realized what it means to live with rage! When I read about it in other reviews, I always tried to imagine what it would be like for me, but for me it turned out very differently than I had imagined. I really only worry most of the time by the end of the day about not getting everything done that I wanted to and why there are so few hours in the day. I go to bed with joyful anticipation of the next day and wake up full of enthusiasm, because I know why and what I am going to do. And all this despite the fact that outwardly nothing much has changed. “
APATHY: It’s impossible to live like this, and it’s impossible to live like this
Apathy accompanies quite different processes and can be in different vectors with very few exceptions. Accordingly, the causes of fatigue from life in apathy are quite different. This raises the question of what to do when you are tired of everything. The difficulty is that only the individual can answer it.
When the properties of vectors are not realized, desires are not fulfilled all the time – hands are lowered, and psyche reacts mercifully – extinguishes desires. So that it is no longer possible to understand what we want. That’s all that comes to mind – this life doesn’t suit you! I don’t want to live like that anymore! How do I want it? I don’t know. This is often called emotional burnout. But it is not always emotions that “burn out”.
We are largely guided by the understanding of the “right” way of life that we see on TV or on the Internet. Every now and then we are shown “rich layabouts” enjoying life on their yachts or villas, partying in expensive clubs and restaurants … And we always have problems – either with money, or with time. Or the child has snot, or grandmother has pressure. Or a husband who is a slacker and alcoholic, or no husband at all – and you never know which is worse. Each of us gets more than enough of these adventures. We run nonstop, carrying bags, penny-pinching, endless worry. And there is no one to blame. When we managed to get a good night’s sleep, we can hardly remember.
Thanks to system-vector psychology we understand that each of us is endowed from birth with our own set of unique qualities. Each vector has its own desires, its own potential talents and properties of psyche, ideally suited for their realization. Not only that, it is designed by nature that we get the highest pleasure from life when we realize our qualities in society.
It is our nature to want what we cannot fulfill. What makes one live a life that is not one’s own? It is not the “external conditions” to which we are so eager to shift responsibility. The reason is again a lack of self-understanding. Sometimes, intuitively, we find ways to bring ourselves into balance. The condition slightly improves, it is possible to continue to live. Soon fatigue returns again, and there is no more time and energy for your favorite activities.
It is not necessary to be strong, it is necessary to be necessary.
The realization of an adult is always an exchange of qualities for values. And the values are different for each vector. It seems to us that the situation will be saved only by a radical change in life, while the solution may not be so difficult. Not all of us really want a villa and a yacht, it may be enough to hear from her husband the words of love and gratitude. The very understanding of what one really wants removes most of the problems, even if objectively there is every reason to be tired of life.
For example: a woman with an anal vector is potentially an ideal hostess, but she vitally needs to be respected by other family members and expressed gratitude. What if she gives her all of herself to her family, and she doesn’t even hear a “thank you” in return for the dinner she cooks? Does no one want her efforts? Resentment arises, and then – a sense of fatigue from this unbearable burden. And if at work it is impossible to have a comfortable for anal vector measured pace, constantly jerked, do not allow to finish what has been started?
Lack of realization of given properties or trying to live “someone else’s” life is a huge stress to the psyche. When we do not get what we want for too long, at first we feel frustration and irritation. But we are not aware of our desires! This is why it is not a specific situation that irritates, but everything irritates. To protect us from chronic painful experiences, to reduce the intensity of experience, gradually comes apathy. And further on – a man blundering through life for the allotted time.
Even if external conditions seem to be an absolute dead end, system-vector psychology Yuri Burlan helps get rid of apathy and enjoy life again. And it all begins with self-understanding. The efficacy of this technique has been proven by numerous repeated results.
“I came out of this state of vacuum, of a state of nothing, of an unwillingness to do anything. There are no more thoughts – I’m tired, I’m bored with everything, I don’t want anything. I don’t let myself get hung up in my thoughts. Gone is the tension, the feeling of powerlessness and emptiness. There is no longer this groundless anger and irritation. It’s like I came out of a prolonged coma. I became easier to lift…”.
“After a month of training my apathy toward life was gone. I began to be very interested in life. I became interested in people. It became easy for me to be among them. I still do not understand them completely, but I no longer shy away from them as I did before the training. “
DEPRESSION: know yourself – find the meaning of life
The reason for the fatigue of our heroine, as well as many other owners of the sound vector, is a lack of meaning. Without understanding the meaning it is impossible to perform a single action, and the feeling of meaninglessness of life as such kills. There seems to be no meaning to life.
The abstract intellect needs silence, concentration, and tension of the mind. Only in this way do answers to the philosophical questions of existence come. That’s how poetry and music come. This is how ideas come. But there is an important condition: the concentration must be outside – on people, on external tasks. For those who do not possess a sonic vector, this clarification will seem strange. Nevertheless, for sounders the possibility of falling into the abyss of their own worlds is too great. Alas, inside one’s own head one cannot find an answer to the sonic query “what is the meaning of life”, no matter in what form it is formulated.
Only the owners of the sound vector want to get to the root cause and clothe this search with all kinds of forms. Not understanding their real desires, they often seek altered states of consciousness in the hope of discerning Something that hides beyond this reality. Some choose easier ways – meditation, drugs. Some study foreign languages or engage in programming in the hope of finding an answer there. Some stare at distant universes, believing that they are the ones that hold the memory of the root cause. Some live an “ordinary” life, unaware of their desires – they have the hardest time.
Vector is desire. Like a compass needle that always points north. Can you change its direction? You can. But nothing useful will come out of it, except an overstrain on the system. In our case – overstrain of psyche and, if we speak about sound vector possessors, subsequent depression. And this is not an abstract thing, but a real suffering.
Nature has a special demand from the owners of the sound vector: we determine the life of all mankind by our awareness of the Meanings. How this happens is explained in detail in the training of Yuri Burlan “System-Vector Psychology”. And first of all we have to cognize ourselves by our differences from others. Then already put together for myself all system of the world order, where each element is ideally entered in the general plan.
“For a year and a half I sat on antidepressants, turned into a vegetable, stopped feeling life, but there was no relief, I lived just a vegetable… I came to the training, realizing that if I did not do something else, then I would just turn into the garbage of society, if I did not jump out the window, take pills or cut out my heart, then I would definitely go crazy or end my life in a dump. After a few sessions I found myself thinking that for some time now I just don’t think about death. Somewhere in the middle of the training I felt a great desire to open a window and look at people… I LOOKED AT SUMMER! I suddenly saw that I was walking down the street, and it was summer! It was warm and there were lilacs. I stopped and smelled the lilacs ))) How is that possible? How did I live without an SVP. “
“Relief came immediately – I realized that I wasn’t crazy. That there are a huge number of people just like me, asking themselves the same questions. I didn’t want to die or run away from this world to a monastery.”
I’ve had enough! What to do if I’m fed up?
All of the reasons described above can and do ruin life together. Residents of modern cities often have several vectors. In such a case, it is really difficult to sort out your own feelings – whether there is no point in living, or whether you are tired of living joylessly. One thing is clear: you need to do something with your life.
“I’ve had enough! I don’t want to live like this anymore!” – These are the words that have guided many into a new world. A real life. Their own.
It doesn’t mean that all problems have evaporated, although that happens. It doesn’t mean that life no longer presents challenges. It’s simple: if you can see where your faucet is leaking, it’s easy to fix it. But where are your energies going aimlessly? How can you fill their lack? Systems-vector psychology is a simple mindfulness tool to help you troubleshoot your life.
Try this tool in action at the next free online training Yuri Burlan .
What to do if you get tired of life: 6 steps to help you recover
Getting tired of life from time to time is normal. Sooner or later each of us has such a growing sense of exhaustion that it robs us of motivation and joy in life. Complicating things is the fact that we rarely talk about our feelings so as not to appear weak, and this slows down the process of dealing with the problem and makes us feel like we are the only ones who will survive the fatigue of life.
Another difficulty: you can’t solve a problem you don’t even know exists. So you have to learn to recognize your condition. If you are really tired of life and are in a state of exhaustion, you will be constantly angry about little things, you will stop sleeping properly, you will not be interested in anything anymore and you will feel devastated.
If you see most of the above signs in yourself, it’s time to restore your strength with a few tips.
1. Think back to the times when things were good, and try to figure out what has changed
This is the most effective way to figure out when things went wrong. Look back and remember the times when you were living your life to the best of your ability or when you just felt happy and motivated. It could have been your high school years, going to university, living in a different city, or being in a different relationship. You can remember what you liked to do when your life was going well. Maybe you had a hobby that kept you going during that period, or you were surrounded by like-minded people.
When you figure out what you had to give up and what you really missed, you can bring it back into your life, thereby finding the strength and motivation to move on.
2. Set goals.
Some people think that life fatigue comes from having too ambitious goals. But allow for a moment the idea that you’re tired of life because you don’t see the point in moving forward. Think about it. What are your goals? What do you want to accomplish? Where do you see yourself in five or ten years? What is the meaning of your existence?
If you can’t answer any of these questions, you’re essentially living a meaningless life. And that’s one of the most important factors that affects how you feel about life. So anger, feelings of exhaustion, and lack of motivation can come from someone who doesn’t set goals for themselves, but lives as they have to.
3. Think about what you’re missing.
Maybe you don’t give yourself time to rest or you’ve had to minimize communication with loved ones because of a heavy workload. You think these are temporary restrictions that won’t affect you and your life, but you’re wrong.
For a full life, you may be missing just regular conversations with friends or family, where you can share your worries and just unload your brain.
4. Slow down.
Early rise, work, home, and on the weekend, trying to close all the burning deadlines, household chores, a long-awaited nap, and here’s Monday again. Be honest, does this consistency scare you? We’re so used to running around like a squirrel in a wheel that we have no idea what it’s like to slow down, carve out half an hour from our schedule to rest, set aside household chores, and spend our day off to entertain or socialize with loved ones. We are too busy to rest. We move too fast to stop for a moment and pay attention to the things that really matter to us.
Stop running – slow your step. Plan a vacation even if you can’t make it, delegate things, don’t take work home, allow yourself to go out with friends instead of lingering over household chores.
5. Make an effort in areas that are beyond your control
You may not have enough money to move to a city where life would be most comfortable for you; you may realize that a loved one you miss so much can no longer return. In any case, remember that there is always the possibility of trying one last time and making sure that it really won’t work. You just need to indoctrinate yourself to be content with the idea and then start working on making it happen. Nothing is impossible, especially if you haven’t tried it yet.
6. Restore motivation
An important factor in getting joy out of life is our level of motivation. As soon as you start doing small but pleasant things, you will immediately begin to enjoy life in general. Start small – pick one day of the week and dedicate it exclusively to yourself. On this day do whatever you want without talking yourself out of it: draw, dance, do silly things, go out with someone, or just watch soap operas all day.
For the other six days, continue living your normal routine, but add some nice little things. Wear your favorite perfume, dress comfortably, exercise, eat well, and stay away from things that drain you mentally or physically.