If the boss is a man. How to be a subordinate?
Nowadays, managers of different levels can be both men and women.
Despite the fact that the appointment to leadership positions mainly takes into account the professional experience and business qualities of a person, in the same team a male and a female leader will behave differently.
In order to establish mutual understanding and good relations with management, the rank-and-file employees should know which line of behavior they should choose in order to avoid possible problems. Clinical psychologist Elena Kharitontseva (Moscow) talks about the gender specifics of managers’ behavior and how subordinates should behave in each case.
The origins of the problem
Men and women use different ways of processing information and react differently to certain situations, so between men and women often have different difficulties in business and personal relationships. This is due to the way the brain works: men have a more developed left hemisphere and 6 times more gray matter in the brain than women. Because of this, they have a well developed spatial thinking, they have a good sense of time and three-dimensional objects, and can concentrate on solving one important task. Men are more successful in situations where one should react quickly to what is happening or solve a certain problem very quickly and as effectively as possible.
Women have more developed white matter of the brain: the right and left hemispheres of the female brain are better connected by nerve fibers. Because of this, women can keep several tasks in their head at once, are more in-depth and have more flexibility in assessing situations and making decisions.
Thus, due to neuropsychological differences, average women and men in leadership positions react differently to conflicts, stressful situations and tasks. Understanding the peculiarities of female and male behavior will help subordinates to establish optimal relations with the manager, reduce stress and avoid possible conflicts. It should be remembered that in this case we are talking about averaged models of behavior – all people are individual, so in each case the behavior of the manager may differ from the statistical average.
The peculiarities of a male leader
In their relations with their subordinates male executives behave in a more reserved manner, but they are inclined to risk and are not afraid to try something new. Male supervisors are more straightforward in their relations with their subordinates. They behave better in a stressful situation, but if a stressful or conflict situation occurs inside a team, a man pays little attention to the reaction or psychological state of employees – the result is more important to him.
Male leaders are characterized by the following distinctive features.
Male leaders are more rational than women. They talk less, but put more meaning into their speech. Men like clear and concrete facts and do not like to listen to long and lengthy explanations. They do not like working with large amounts of information, it irritates them. Men prefer to concentrate on one task and find it more difficult to switch to other production issues and tasks.
2. Conflict Management
In conflict situations, men act more effectively than women: they are quicker to find either a compromise that will help resolve the production conflict, or resolve the situation by their own volitional decision – quickly and finally. For this reason there are no prolonged or “pressing” conflicts in teams led by men (especially if the team is small). If a conflict situation arises, it is resolved fairly quickly. Unlike a woman, a man rarely resorts to outside specialists to resolve a conflict – he resolves it himself, by his own volitional decision.
3. Determination .
This is one of the most important distinctions of male leadership. Men take risks easier and are not afraid to make a mistake: in case of a mistake or failure, they just continue to act, not worrying about “what if. “. For this reason, institutions run by men can have quite large one-time bonuses.
Men are characterized by a clear focus on results, so they are not distracted by personal or family problems at work. Unlike women, personal problems of male executives almost never affect their relations with their subordinates.
5. Standing up for themselves.
Men have a subtle sense of competition and rivalry, so it is extremely important for them to clearly defend their own position, especially if a man is not quite sure of himself. For this reason it is difficult to achieve a compromise in relations with a male leader, and to change his mind is dangerous for the subordinate: if the employee is too assertive and actively defends his point of view, the manager may perceive it as a threat to his authority.
6. Reaction to stress with
In a stressful situation men increase their powers of observation and begin to actively produce testosterone, so they focus on solving the problem without emotion, using only objective data. Men perform better than women in stressful or high-risk situations. Where there is a “man-system” interaction (technical services, etc.), male leadership is more effective, and where there is a “man-human” interaction (e.g., medical or psychological services), women perform better.
Tips for Subordinates
1. With a male leader, employees should behave more independently. It is very important to address the manager only with a specific question or on a specific case and to formulate your thoughts clearly and as briefly as possible. It is not necessary to coordinate every step or decision with the manager unnecessarily if there is no special instruction to do so. One should not address him/her on the slightest occasion or too often – in this case the manager may think that the employee is not confident or cannot cope with his/her work.
2. It is very important for subordinates to copy the supervisor’s behavior, both verbal and nonverbal. If a supervisor behaves in a reserved and sedate manner and talks slowly, a hurried, fussy or fast-talking employee may irritate him, sometimes even at the unconscious level. In this case, even if such an employee will offer something of value, the manager may have an aversion mechanism. That is why it is very important to copy the behavior of a male supervisor, especially if he is older or higher in rank.
3. When communicating with the supervisor you should not gesticulate much – this will help the subordinate to calm down. A reserved pose, a calm voice, and a measured pace of speech will help the employee convey his thoughts more precisely to the manager and be better heard.
4. It is not necessary to argue too actively or too emotionally with a male leader – this will lead to the opposite result. If you’re lucky and your manager is a professional, if he’s confident and has good self-esteem, he may take your point of view. But if he is insecure, he may see you as a competitor. In this case, he will not accept even your most rational proposals, but you can make an enemy in his face. Therefore, when dealing with the head it is necessary to observe a certain parity. On the other hand, after some time, such a boss may well pass off your suggestions as his. This is normal, as the task of the team is to achieve a certain result.
5. For a male supervisor, a businesslike approach on the part of subordinates is important: he will not forgive mistakes of employees because of problems in their personal lives. A man believes that work is work and family problems should not interfere with work tasks.
6. Under no circumstances should you question the authority of a male leader – he will perceive it as a threat. Even if you are very lucky with the chief, he will still require you to strict obedience and compliance with the chain of command.
What is the man-director in love and relationships
Does a man’s profession affect how he shows himself in sex and relationships? Our columnist Milana Uvarova sure: affects, and how!
A man with certain personal qualities, the mindset and temperament chooses for himself the profession that helps him to express himself. And relationships, in fact – the same self-expression, and most sincere of all possible. By the way a person is in love and sex, you can tell a lot about himself.
Flip through the gallery and see what the wives of famous billionaires look like:
The male director is a very good organizer. He always knows where to take the lady of his heart, how to spend time, in what restaurant and at what time to book a table, what movie show to choose. You do not have to painfully invent ideas for a joint leisure.
He appreciates time, so he knows where and when there are traffic jams, when it’s better to go by subway, and when – by car. If he said he’d pick you up at 15:00, he’ll pick you up at exactly that time and will be waiting for you to be ready. But you’ll get to the restaurant/park/friends’ apartment in exactly the time he promised.
It’s not that the director likes to boss you around. He just knows how to organize people and take responsibility for the result. If he has planned a project (a date is also a kind of project), he expects the woman to comply with all the agreements.
Yes, he is good at strategic planning, but sometimes inflexible in case of force majeure. Unless his specialty is crisis management. The average director can falter in the face of an unforeseen situation, so he is not attracted to flighty women, who tend to change their opinions according to their moods.
The male director is a man of his word and deed. As he said, so it will be. In this sense, a more reliable partner is still to be found.
He also lives in constant stress and is often tired. More precisely, he lives and works as if in two modes – “on” and “off”. More often than not, personal relationships are in the second mode. Yes, at the stage of courtship, he will show his best side, because the skills of self-presentation honed to the smallest detail, but in the relationship more often expects warmth, support, stability and peace of mind.
Harsh manager at work, in the home environment can be the cutest little cat: affectionate, obedient, willing to compromise. All because the male director is tired of responsibility at work and at home prefers to relax, leaving all the decisions to his partner.
In sex male directors can be quite different. Goal-oriented achievers who expect their partner to orgasm on a schedule. Or gentle lovers who enjoy slow, sensual sex as a way to relax and distract from worries.
As for family finances, the male director would rather control them himself. He likes to understand what condition the love ship is in, whether it needs fixing and how long it will be able to stay afloat.
Male directors suitable woman strong, economical, provide a reliable rear. Or tenacious, goal-oriented businesswomen who perfectly understand all the hardships of life manager and even support helpful advice.