The ability to wait in a relationship: explaining the point

5 suggestions about the importance of waiting

The skill of waiting is a true art. Whoever has developed this talent proves that he has reached an important degree of personal evolution. It involves self-control, tolerance for disappointment, restraint, and the ability to see reality in perspective.

When we come into the world, we are the opposite. A child is not put off by meeting your needs . He wants what he wants and asks for it to be delivered immediately. If he fails, he gets discouraged and cries.

Consequently, the ability to wait is a conquest it is achieved only by time, experience and patient work with yourself . It is a great virtue that protects and strengthens in the face of adversity. It enables us to deal with bad times with a great attitude. The great thinkers know all this, and that is why they have given us wonderful principles in this regard. Here are some of them.

” He who does not want to, is not disappointed. And he who is not disappointed will not be degraded. Thus, the true sage waits in peace while things happen and they do not send out their desires. So peace and harmony have their place, and the world goes on its way.”

-Lao Tse-

1. The pleasure of the skill of waiting

If anyone cultivates the art of waiting, it is hunters and fishermen. That’s why one of Joseph Antoine René Joubert’s phrases is, “The pleasure of hunting is the pleasure of waiting. As you can see, in this case we are not talking about waiting as a sacrifice, but as something that brings satisfaction.

The hunter’s expectation is an active expectation. Being part of the problem that implies being able to catch your prey . The only way to catch it is to give it time to come out of hiding and be in a position where it can act.

The same is true of fishermen. In the background is a metaphor for life. A good moment is not all moments. You have to wait for it and know how to act when it is presented.

2. the best way to wait.

This is a phrase by Gustave Flaubert that says the following: You must wait when you are desperate , and walk when you are expected “. This is the paradox of the ability to wait. It does not mean passivity, just moving in the right direction.

Active waiting has to do with not stopping, just to see how time passes. It has more to do with knowing that it is important to keep moving forward , Although this progression is limited or does not offer exactly what we are looking for immediately.

3. it is better not to get ahead of ourselves.

Part of the art of knowing how to wait is not to find ourselves in mental scenarios of the future. Especially when it involves possible problems, but is not present. Many times we wear a lot, trying to solve problems that haven’t even arisen.

This is roughly what Julia Navarro reminds us when she says, “When we get to this river, we’ll talk about this bridge. “. Going back to the metaphor, we will never know if we will actually reach this river. Maybe we never do, but we spend a lot of time and life building the bridge in our imagination.

4. Wait with hope

This phrase by Samuel Johnson says the following: ” One must wait, though hope must always be frustrated, for Hope itself is joy, and its failures, though frequent, are less terrible than its extinction. “.

According to Johnson, hope itself is joy. It means looking to the future with optimism and positive expectations. Although it is not as expected, the attitude itself is a plus for our lives . In contrast, despair is the death of all illusions in the face of tomorrow. With this, life itself begins to lose value.

5. Everything comes .

This is one of the simplest phrases, but it is also more convincing with regard to expectation. It says the following: All things come to him who knows how to wait.” The author of this maxim was Henry W. Longfellow. He summed up in one sentence all there is to say about the art of waiting.

Many times we don’t get what we want because we’re not persistent enough. Sometimes it takes time, and sometimes that time is also considerable . This long wait can cause us to strive to act or abandon the goal in advance. We forget that the more we persist, the better our chances of achieving what we seek.

The skill of waiting has to do with maturity, with balance, with character . It is one of the hardest conquests in life, but it is also one of the sweetest and most enriching. He who knows how to wait also knows how to live.

Patience, the art of knowing how to wait Patience is learned, though in many cases it is still unresolved. We can follow some guidance and reinforce this necessary attitude. Read more “

The ability to wait in a relationship: explaining the point

Oh, how many times in my life has someone said to me, “You have to be able to wait,” “All in good time,” and a million other variations on the theme. I’m glad I realized in time: life won’t change until you change it.

Lingering waiting – a stable female condition or a rare case? Do you have to wait for a man? Or “take the bull by the horns”?

I have prepared a checklist of the five most popular cases where you do not need to wait.

Take a notebook, pen and write a synopsis! So, DO NOT WAIT:

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  • You never know what lies ahead. You might go to work tomorrow and suddenly get that promotion you’ve been wanting for a long time. Whether you believe in fate or not, life is unpredictable. If you manage to accept the fact that you can’t influence some things, you’ll be able to avoid unnecessary stress and keep hope alive.

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1. When he makes the first move

Women’s initiative is one of the most controversial moments in the relationship between a man and a woman. Not only because it is entirely entangled in a thread of stereotypes.

More often than not, this question arises while still dating. While men are afraid of rejection, women are guessing married or not. Or, even worse, insist on making the first move.

Do not wait until the man of your dreams decides to get acquainted. Linger on him for 3-4 seconds and smile sweetly. He will understand everything himself. And will be ready, if not to get acquainted himself, then accept your offer for coffee.

He will feel your sympathy. And you won’t have any remnants of the missed opportunity.

Of course, there are men who are self-sufficient and do not require an “invective.

But often their approaches are copied and distorted by beggars, alphonsees, and professional courtesans. To get their attention and to get acquainted is to put a checkmark in the list of victories.

Identify such a man can be at first sight and just one question – you can! How to do this I tell you in my free authoring online course Men: an honest guide.

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  • Evaluate all aspects of what you want. If you want fame, you must be prepared for invasions of your personal life, judgment from others, and the realization that fame can pass quickly.

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2. When he leaves his wife.

It is said that every mistress dreams of being a wife. I believe that the role of mistress is demeaning to a woman.

“Mistress” is a status in which a woman lives in chronic expectation. When he will find a minute or free the evening, when the wife will go to Italy, when the children will grow up, the mother will recover…

And in this status you will always play only a secondary role. Like a set in a theater, because the audience looks at the actors, not at the curtain.

Another option: a wife in waiting mode – husband after mistress. He cheated once or he cheats right and left, and she is faithfully waiting for the man to come to his senses. After all, he promised to make it right.

Honey, if a man has cheated, of course, you are partly to blame, but when everything repeats itself in a circle – get out of the relationship. Take the experience and run.

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Article information

In other languages:

English: Learn to Wait for What You Want, Português: Aprender a Esperar Pelo Que Deseja, Bahasa Indonesia: Belajar Menunggu Apa yang Diinginkan, Español: aprender a esperar por lo que quieres, Nederlands: Leren wachten op wat je wilt, العربية: تعلم الانتظار على ما تريد, Français: Apprendre à attendre ce qu’on veut, Tiếng Việt: Chờ đợi những điều bạn muốn, 한국어: 원하는 것을 기다리는 법, ไทย: เทย:เรียนรู้ที่จะรอคอยในสิ่งที่ตัวองต้องการ, Deutsch: Lernen, auf das zu warten, was du dir wünschst

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3. When he’s matured.

5 years together, then they live, then they part; 7 years the friend shows signs of attention, but doesn’t make the first step; 2 months they have sex once a week and there is no hint of serious relationship; he is 3 years younger and has not made love yet…

Do these situations sound familiar? I’m sure it does! When a woman gets trapped in an “unclear relationship,” first of all, it’s a reason to work on yourself.

If this case concerns you, too, analyze how you behaved in a relationship with men, and whether they have anything in common. And you’re sure to find a match, and not one.

And even if the mother, grandmother and aunt Sveta together shouting: “Take the boy – there are no men left! You’ll raise him yourself!” – Do not listen to their advice.

You have only one life, and it is up to you to choose each of your men. The only question is whether your choice will be conscious or “traditional.

Some women have excellent intuition. If your intuition tells you that you do not need to wait for this man, then do it.

If you’re constantly waiting for something from a man, you’re in a passive position. Most likely, you’re not ready to work on your relationship together and solve your problems together.

This needs to be fixed right away.

Let me be honest with you… When a man likes a woman, he doesn’t slow down.

Many girls just can’t believe the fact that a man is comfortable, comfortable, pleasant around you… AND THAT’S ALL.

If more and more often your relationship is associated in your head with the “incomprehensible”, the options are two. The first – to let him go, the easiest. The second is more complicated, have a heart-to-heart talk and figure out what is keeping you from getting to the next level.

Such a conversation allows you to find and work through the problems, resentments, misunderstandings, and identify the goals of each of you in the relationship.

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4. When he apologizes.

Resentments, quarrels and grievances are very dangerous not only for the relationship, but also for the inner state of each partner.

Psychosomatics is not an empty word. And to deny that emotions have no effect on our lives makes no sense at all.

“Stifled” emotions, the inability to forgive rob you of your feminine beauty, because your whole being is trying to contain this negativity.

Learn to live your emotions and talk about your feelings to your man. Believe me, he is ready to listen to you! You just need to pick up the words.

Don’t wait for him to apologize – he may not even understand where and how he was wronged. He forgot, he worked too hard, he didn’t hear you or ignored you – it doesn’t matter. Tell him about it!

The “waiting” position is the position of the passive victim.

If in a relationship with a man you stop waiting and will make the first steps towards reconciliation, he will appreciate your step.

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5. When he proposes

Female victims convince themselves that marriage saves them from all their troubles and worries. That’s why they wait years and years for him to be ready. But you shouldn’t do it that way.

First of all, the law of desire works. If you passionately want something and you are as much afraid that it will not happen – your worst fears will be confirmed.

Marriage is no guarantee of happiness for a woman. And marriage is not an indicator of responsibility for a man.

In a huge number of marriages the spouses live a purely formal life and there can be no talk about any kind of intimacy and love.

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You have had enough!

Stop waiting! So you’re missing out on the most wonderful opportunities of your life and maybe along with them a decent man.

Waiting – kills initiative and deprives you of energy.

An active attitude in life is one of those qualities that attracts worthy men. So the most effective way to attract a worthy man is to pump yourself up as a woman and constantly work on your femininity.

With faith in you, Yaroslav Samoilov.

Free online course
“Man: an honest guide to use.

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