Mistress of a married man: rules of conduct
The advantages of the role of a mistress. The rules of conduct of a smart mistress. How to act a married mistress? How to properly steal a beloved man out of the family? Common mistakes of a mistress.
Advantages of the role of a mistress
So, what are the advantages of such a position?
A woman does not owe anyone anything. Agree, at least once in your life you have dreamed of an easy relationship in which no one pressures you. You do not have to give your man all your free time. If you want, you can have a relationship with several young men. And you won’t have to feel guilty about having a steady partner (unless, of course, you have a spouse).
Great relationship experience. Communicating with the opposite sex allows us to learn to understand people better. Every relationship is a valuable experience that helps us work through our own mistakes.
Having a good time. Contrary to popular belief, a married lover can give you not only fabulous sex, but also fascinating communication. Many couples enjoy visiting theaters, exhibitions, and taking small trips. A new person in your life can help you find a stimulus for self-development and self-improvement.
Distraction from everyday life. Unfortunately, everyday life is the reason for the cooling of feelings in many married couples. Quarrels and misunderstandings often arise on this basis. With a married lover you can forget about all these problems. Meetings with him – it is a holiday of romance.
Fresh emotions. How often in life there is a lack of new feelings that make us look at the world in a different way. The wise mistress of a married man enjoys secret dates, finding some special zest and spice in this position. If this is the kind of feeling you are looking for, you will have to change your lover from time to time.
Material support. Becoming the mistress of a wealthy man, you will be able to receive from him pleasant gifts that he could not afford before. Nothing wrong with this: you give him positive emotions, and he spoils you luxurious surprises.
The lover can provide material support
Why does a man need a mistress?
Speaking about the rules of conduct for the mistress of a married man, you should first of all understand why men decide to cheat on their spouses. What do the representatives of the stronger sex really want from girls? Here are the main reasons for adultery:
A mature man wants to feel young and reckless again. To do this, he chooses young and pretty girls who are willing to give him their own time.
The man is tired of constant relationships that are filled with scandals and quarrels. He is looking for an opportunity to pour out his soul and talk about his own problems. The man expects understanding and moral support from his mistress. This is not a spouse who nags him almost every second.
After several years of marriage, the man realizes that he lacks fresh emotions. At home he is greeted by the same woman, dressed in the same housecoat. He knows every inch of her body, he has learned thoroughly what gives her pleasure in bed. He remembers by heart the names of her favorite perfumes and TV shows. He just lacks variety, not only in sex, but also in relationships.
Sometimes a man wants new emotions
Problems in bed. Intimate relationships in the family often gradually come to naught. Unfortunately, this is primarily the fault of the spouses, who stop looking after their own figure and appearance. There are also women who are almost indifferent to sex. So a man has to look for satisfaction on the side.
Revenge. If a man suspects or catches his wife in an affair, not every man decides to get a divorce. Some husbands simply have mistresses, which help them improve their self-esteem.
Thus, in the mistress of the man in the first place looking for what he lacks in his own family. And these are the very things that once accompanied the beginning of a relationship with his current spouse.
A man never decides to cheat in order to start a new family. From this follows the first rule of behavior for a married man’s mistress: you should never, under any circumstances, wait to continue the relationship. By allowing yourself to think that one day he will leave his spouse and come to you, you doomed yourself to suffering. Do you need it?
Tips for the mistress of a married man
Do not try to keep a man to himself with any gifts and nice surprises. Ties, lighters, perfume, put aside for a permanent partner with whom you will be linked serious relationship. The best gift for a lover is you. In beautiful lingerie, neat outfit, with good styling and natural makeup. Do not turn into a caring mommy.
Do not pry into your lover’s personal life. Asking him about his family, you are likely to hear no truth. Most often men tell their mistresses that they live with their spouses as neighbors, there is no intimacy between them, and in general they sleep in different beds. Naive girls believe this nonsense and … invent feelings from the man. At the same time, the hero-lover himself has a great time with you and his wife.
The lover must have a private life
Realize that the spouse will be for a man in the first place. Let the feeling faded, let the sex they really have problems, but they are connected by many years of life together and possibly common children. In addition, according to numerous surveys, a small percentage of men are ready to sacrifice the usual comfortable living conditions for the sake of a new adventure. Enjoying your company, he will go home, where he was waiting for dinner, cooked by his wife. And do not make of it a tragedy too.
Do not try to become his second wife. If it turned out that you really fell in love with her lover, do not try to keep him out of the family, ironing his shirts or pampering him with delicious treats. In this case, his interest in you will gradually fade, because there will be no intrigue.
Do not acquaint a man with his relatives. Chances are, the proposal of such a meeting will just alienate the lover, who will think that you have some kind of a plan for him. This rule does not apply to friends and acquaintances.
Are you expecting gifts and expensive surprises from your lover? In that case, from the beginning you have to act like a real lady. During the first visit to the restaurant, you should not take out your purse purse and try to pay for yourself. Also accustom the man to come to you not to come empty-handed. At least, a bouquet of daisies must be present. Be a weak and desirable girl for him.
Don’t involve a man in your personal life. You have every right to communicate with other members of the male sex. Let him know that your relationship will last exactly as long as you want it, not him.
Speak directly to him about what you’re not happy in your relationship. For example, when you are at home, he switches the TV to the sports channel. Or he is constantly late for meetings without a good reason. Do not be silent and do not play the martyr. Man must know that before him – self-sufficient and confident girl. You do not have to play by his rules.
Be busy doing something. In addition to work you should find yourself an interesting hobby. Go to the gym, Chinese courses, literary circle, go to the theater, etc. A busy schedule of life will not only make your life brighter, but also show your lover that he is not the center of the universe for you. Let the man himself adjust to the rhythm of your life and find time for dates.
Flirting with a married man and how not to cross a fine line
Professional copywriter with a philological education. I have a wide outlook.
The expert – Margarita Lopukhova
Family psychologist. For eight years I have been saving “family units” from disintegration. I help couples regain love and understanding.
It often happens that married men do not have enough experience and emotions, and he begins to flirt with other women. Life and the monotony of family life spur men on new “feats”. This is not necessarily cheating or flirting on the side.
Attention married man can manifest itself in compliments, easy courtship, ambiguous jokes, and at this point it is important for a woman to understand what to expect from men, and how serious his intentions. After all, flirting with a married man – a fine line, which is important not to cross, so as not to destroy the family happiness.
The situation may unfold in a slightly different way. Sometimes a married man likes a woman and she begins to flirt with him herself. Not in order to steal him out of the family, but simply because of his feminine nature. After all, for many members of the female sex, flirting is a special manner of communication, sometimes it does not involve anything serious.
When it comes to flirting with a married man, the concept of flirting has changed its meaning. This is not the kind of flirting that could be between a free man and a free woman, it is light and unobtrusive communication that does not cross certain boundaries.
In any case, when flirting with a married man, there are some important rules.
Sometimes flirting with a married man begins to turn into something more serious. In this case, it is important for a girl to fight back hard and clarify what the man expects from their communication. Sexual hints, secret meetings and other spicy stuff unobtrusively suggest that innocent flirting smoothly flows into a stronger emotional connection between a man and a woman.
When is the moment when flirting ceases to be just flirting and turns into cheating?
Once a woman has a feeling of guilt, which she strenuously drowns out, it means that the innocent flirting is not so innocent. Women’s intuition simply suggests that it is time to stop. At heart, the woman will try her best to justify herself.
She tries her best to convince herself that nothing serious is going on, but in fact the situation has already gone too far. Woman tries hard to convince herself that it’s just talk, just meetings, just friendship, just light flirting … But his consciousness is not deceived, and a sense of guilt confirm this.
In communication flirting appear juicy messages, photos that somehow want to delete, so that no one would see. This is a sure sign that flirting with a married man has gone too far. A man can carefully hide all correspondence with a woman, put secret locks and codes on his phone, just so his wife would not see it.
You can convince yourself that this is only for the good, because his wife may not understand it all. But in fact she will understand everything correctly, if of course she will see. And so it’s time to stop with the correspondence.
Loss of time.
When communication between a man and a woman is delayed longer than it should be, a 15-minute meeting over a cup of coffee turns into a whole hour, it is worth paying attention to this. Flirting is certainly a good thing, but there has to be a measure of communication.
Man, innocently flirting with a woman, begins to lie to his wife that he is at a meeting, busy, called to the boss, or invent any other reason to “fend off” his wife. All of this is a sure sign that flirting with a married man has gone too far. To understand the unpleasantness of the situation, it is enough to put yourself in the wife’s shoes.
These are not necessarily direct hints of sex, but a certain intimate atmosphere that occurs when communicating with a married man. Long glances, unexpected touches, frank topics are all harbingers of erotic overtones. This means that a woman flirting at this point with a married man becomes an “accomplice” to treason.
So how to flirt with a married man and not to cross the line of decency? The basic rules in this case look like this:
- Do not discuss with a married man his spouse, family and in general do not touch such serious topics. Then flirting with a married man has all the chances to remain an innocent affair. Especially since a well-meaning husband would be extremely uncomfortable discussing his spouse with anyone.
- Do not talk about sex. Not in any context. Erotic jokes in any form foreshadow a shortening of the distance between the flirtatious, which is fraught with very well known consequences.
- Find out intentions. If unobtrusive, and then very even intrusive flirting continues day after day, it is important to know the man’s intentions. Is he just having fun? Or their family boat gave a breach, and by their courtship the man is trying to get away from those problems? If that is the reason, it is better to send a man to solve his family business right away, and then flirt back.
In general, flirting with a married man can bring just pleasure, if you do not violate certain rules. A woman can safely enjoy compliments, romantic glances, perhaps even small gifts, but do not get carried away. It is enough to put yourself in the place of his spouse and understand how she will be uncomfortable with the courtship of another woman.
Sometimes, with the help of flirting and courting for another man is trying to get away from family problems. This is also unacceptable, because family problems need to be solved immediately, rather than running away from them