Reasons for breaking up with a guy

The main reasons for breaking up

The breakup of an established relationship is a very hard process. At the moment when you have to let your loved one go, you have to give up joint plans and dreams. The future becomes not as clear as it was just a couple of days ago. From an outsider’s perspective, it is often impossible to explain why this or that couple suddenly broke up. Needless to say, sometimes even the former partners themselves do not realize the reasons for their separation immediately and not completely.

Once and for all?

There are different ways to break up. Not too often, but there are cases where lovers after a temporary break come together again. Sometimes this episode in the relationship even strengthens the further attachment to each other. But not all breakup scenarios are positive.

  • Some couples after the end of a romantic relationship maintain friendly or warm friendly relations. Of course, this is possible if both people were able to cope with their emotions and distract from painful feelings. It happens that former couples eventually form very good and close friends for life.

More often than not, a breakup ends up being a complete breakdown in communication. If one partner’s feelings have not faded, any reminder and contact causes him heartache. The breakup often leaves a deep resentment, and people in such a case deliberately sever all communication with each other.

  • Couples experiencing a crisis of relationships, often take a mutual decision on a temporary pause. This is not a bad psychological shake-up, an opportunity to reflect on and test their feelings. Sincere love after the reunion only flares up stronger. But you should not resort to this method for any trouble in the relationship.
  • Breakups in which one or both partners retain sincere feelings are very difficult. Regardless of the reasons for the breakup, the person is forced to toss and turn between the desire to be with his beloved and the impossibility of continuing the relationship. Feelings can last and not fade for months or even years. It takes tremendous willpower to leave in love. Often it leads to long-term depression.

Reasons for Breakup

So why do people who once loved each other still break up? For what reasons does one or both partners are inclined to break up the relationship? What factors and life situations cause couples and family unions to break up?

  • Disillusionment with a partner can be the cause of a relationship breakup. Many people, especially at a young age, tend to give their beloved a lot of qualities that he does not have, to present an ideal and desirable image for themselves. Especially often rapid disappointment occurs after the start of life together. Common life reveals hitherto not manifested or skillfully disguised flaws and personality traits. Often the test of living together is not passed even by couples who have safely met for several years.
  • Strong differences in interests and incompatibility of characters can lead to separation. It is very difficult to be with someone who does not share your hobbies, life views. Mutual support, acceptance of the partner is important in the relationship. But with cardinally opposite outlook to build and maintain trust, filled with understanding and mutual respect relationships are unlikely to succeed.

  • Breakup with a boyfriend or girlfriend can occur due to loss of interest on the part of the partner. At the beginning of a relationship, trying to create the best possible impression and win the heart of the loved one, lovers shower each other with gifts, nice words, phone calls and other signs of attention. After that, some people find it hard to accept the fact that all romance is in the past. Both women and men are very important to feel the attention of their partner at any stage of even a long relationship. Lack of care and signs of love is most often interpreted as fading feelings.
  • Lies can ruin both friendships and love relationships. If repeated repeatedly and intentionally, deception leaves a deep wound and can ruin a lifelong relationship with a person prone to such a vice. Without openness and mutual trust, relationships become strained, because one of the partners must always be on guard.
  • Excessive jealousy and possessiveness of one of the partners also turns the relationship into pure torture. Jealous man wants to control every step of the lover, often arranging aggressive questioning, scenes of mistrust and scandals. Living together turns into a real battlefield. One partner is fighting to keep his freedom and the right to personal space and interests. The other wants to suppress it as much as possible, to subordinate their control.

  • Harmful habits or addictions of the loved one. Alcoholism, addiction to drugs or gambling is a very severe problem, causing pain and anxiety to all the loved ones of the addict. Severe forms of alcoholism and drug addiction are often accompanied by behavioral disorders. Therefore, maintaining normal relationships becomes impossible and living together simply becomes unbearable.
  • Relatives and loved ones of someone in the couple can interfere in the relationship. Often, parents zealously interfere with the union, because the chosen one or the chosen one, in their opinion, is not suitable for the beloved child. Due to financial dependence or excessive attachment, young people often force themselves to follow their parents’ will. However, older parents can also manipulate fully mature, middle-aged children.
  • Psychological or physical abuse, blackmail, and manipulation are very valid and justifiable reasons for separation. A man who is prone to such things and systematically brings down on his partner a barrage of negative emotions and insults is unlikely to give up his model of behavior. But he who, gritting his teeth, will tolerate it all, risks a nervous breakdown, chronic nervous exhaustion and a long goodbye to adequate self-esteem.

The reason for separation can also be such a trivial thing as money. Financial problems can arise suddenly, even in a very successful person. Welfare and confidence in the future are very important for the couple. The obvious prospect of living in poverty with your lover will not make anyone happy.

  • Cheating hurts and discourages someone who has decided to take such a step while in an ongoing relationship. Many guys and girls can forgive a lot of things, but not this. And when infidelity happens after many years of prosperous family life, it is simply confusing. A very small percentage of couples manage to survive cheating and keep the relationship at the same level.
  • Problems in the couple’s sexual life can prompt the termination of the relationship. Very bad if the couple is not ready to adequately discuss sex life, to express to the partner his desires or comments. As a result, the couple gradually drifts away from each other.
  • The monotony of joint life, the absence of new interesting impressions does not help to strengthen the relationship. Couples who have been living together for a long time, at a certain point there comes a “crisis of habit”. The existing way of life gets boring and there is a desire for change. If neither partner feels the looming threat and does not make timely attempts to bring something new into the relationship, the couple may break up.

  • Age crises are a serious test for long-term relationships. Over the course of their lives, everyone goes through several difficult and life-changing periods. Marriage or relationships are often threatened at these times. Young crises are characterized by impulsiveness, a sudden desire for drastic changes. At such times, the guy or girl tends to “cut corners”, they are attracted to everything new, unexplored, hungry for change for the better and ready for action. Mid-life crises are often accompanied by apathy, depression, a sense of disappointment in life. In such situations, it is important to recognize the root of the problem and provide your partner with adequate support.

In severe forms of the course of age crises is better to use the advice of a psychotherapist.

Why do people break up: for what reasons can spouses dissolve the union and file for divorce?

There are many motives for which a man and woman decide to be together.

But in the process of life together there are just as many, if not more reasons to break up.

Why does this happen? When comes the very edge, after which comes the realization: “This can no longer go on”?

What are the main reasons for breakups in modern families?

The main and main reasons cited by psychologists are the following.

Before the wedding.

It often happens that in the turmoil of preparation for the wedding, the main foundation of the marriage union is lost – trust . Strangers begin to work together for the first time to solve important issues, problems, and search for compromises… And, unfortunately, suddenly realize that the future spouse is a completely different person, a stranger. The former connection breaks off.

Because of the quarrel.

The main premise of separation after a quarrel – overconfidence, selfishness and unwillingness to accept the other person as he is. Frequent conflicts and altercations are only consequences of a distorted perception of reality.

Often the person creates an idol of the other half, and then, when the image from the dreams does not match the stated, begins “re-education,” which subsequently leads to discord.

After the birth of a child

The appearance of a new family member is always a serious challenge.

First, the usual way of life of both men and women is radically changing.

Secondly, financial difficulties accumulate, because a significant part of the budget goes to the care of a little man.

Multiply all this by a woman’s dissatisfaction with her appearance, her chronic lack of sleep and, as a consequence, the almost total lack of intimacy, you can get a time bomb.

After a long relationship

Over time, everyone changes – his views and tastes, habits and values are transformed. This evolution may not always coincide with the partner’s worldview and point of view. And a successful relationship needs a regular mutual exchange, a positive influence on each other and joint development.

If one person, so to speak, is running forward, and the other remains in place, it inevitably leads to a breakup, because there is no point of contact, no interest.

The partner does not want to have children.

Similar to the previous motive, people can have diametrically opposed views on the traditional values of society . Unwillingness to create a complete family can be dictated by childhood psychological trauma and unpleasant memories, wrong parental attitudes and spiritual immaturity.

Because of the parents of the husband/wife.

Sometimes parents on one or both sides try to assert themselves at the expense of their children and, as a consequence, are constantly trying to teach them to “live right. As a result, they instill in the couple the wrong attitudes, generating dependence on the opinion of their elders.

The reasons for the breakup of a marriage are both weighty and silly

The weighty reasons for breaking up include:

  • A mutual loss of trust;
  • opposing life values and goals, views and worldviews;
  • Emotional and physical abuse;
  • deceived expectations;
  • Unhealthy addictions and dependencies that are difficult to deal with;
  • Lack of emotional and physical contact, partnership
  • Financial and domestic problems resulting from the inability of spouses to fulfill their responsibilities.

But people also divorce out of stupidity. Separation occurs because of boredom, selfishness, contrived loneliness.

In such cases, in a loved one can be annoying even little things that can be corrected, such as inability to cook delicacies, dislike of pets because of allergies, or the tone of the conversation in the excitement.

The Top Most Common Reasons for Couples to Break Up

The most common reasons for divorce are varied. Let’s look at the main ones.

Why do guys get divorced?

According to most men, the main reasons for breakup lie in the following:

Yes, the strong sex is far from always psychologically mature to the stage of a serious relationship in time.


Women, on the other hand, want a divorce primarily because:

  1. Experiencing insecurity, fear of not meeting the expectations of their partner.
  2. Tired of “everyday life” – the fair sex is important that the romance of the candy-bouquet period of relations at least occasionally diversify everyday life.
  3. Do not feel love – in most cases, it is important for a woman to be in love, and then be loved.
  4. Realize that they made a mistake in the young man, rushed, etc.
  5. They found out the chosen one in treason with the mistress or, on the contrary, tired of the obsessive jealousy.

Why is it important to understand what caused the separation?

Find out every detail of discord, error and time to dot the “i” – important for representatives of both sexes.

After all, very often in disagreements with a partner man acts hastily, rashly, on emotions.

To find out the causes of the relationship termination in time – it means to help yourself to understand if a native and close person really is, if it is worth giving him and yourself a second chance, or is it really better to cut off “once and for all”.

Video on the topic

The reasons for divorce are explained in this video:


To summarize, a breakup is always a blow and a hard ordeal in life for two . But whatever its consequences – a final breakup or an attempt to “enter the same river twice” – understanding the causes gives a clear understanding of how to build a further, already happier, life.

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