My husband does not love me.
It is not necessary to speculate all your life about the behavior of your husband and consider him a being from another planet. You can take a different path – the path of psychological literacy. Understand the features and characteristics of their husbands: why is he like this, but I am different? Why did my husband suddenly say that he does not love me – is it really so, or the reason for it is something else? And what are the actual signs that the husband does not love his wife.
How do I know if my husband has fallen out of love: is it just me, or is this the end?
Again and again you open wedding photos – because you are so happy and in love there! Tears come to my eyes from happiness for the way you were then, and pain for what has become of you now. On that magical day, it seemed that you would be together for life and his feelings for you would grow with each passing day. But the reality turned out to be more like a drama with a sad ending than a happy fairy tale. More and more often a terrible thought arises in my head – my husband does not love me. The further away into the past the wedding day, the worse your husband’s attitude towards you.
Maybe you began to notice signs that your husband fell out of love more and more often:
Does not give flowers and gifts, does not make nice surprises, not once asked for a date – as if you have a hundred years together and tired of each other.
He started to spend too much time at work. Virtually never goes home, and when he does, he keeps talking about work.
Doesn’t pay attention to the family, doesn’t spend time together.
Does not talk about his feelings, does not show any emotions toward you. He is cold and withdrawn. Immersed in computer games or the phone.
Is this the end and there is only one way out with a scary name – divorce? Or is there still a chance to change everything and return her husband’s love? What to do if your husband does not love you?
I am sure that if there is even a small chance to save the family, you will hold on to it. After all, you yourself love your husband with all your soul, every cell and are willing to do anything for him. Despite all the downsides, there were so many happy moments between you! And there is a lot that keeps you together. But does he need this chance? If a man has fallen out of love, how does he behave? How bitter it is to live in this uncertainty. How do you know for sure what your husband feels? And how do you know if your husband has fallen out of love?
The usual suggestions are:
Create a situation in which he shows his attitude toward you (e.g., make him jealous);
Ask your mother or girlfriends for advice;
Go to a fortune teller or astrologer.
Beware: do no harm!
In this kind of advice lurks great danger. At first glance, they seem simple and effective. But these actions can undermine the last trust in the family and cause great harm to your relationship.
And then you may finally lose his love. To prevent this from happening, you need to figure out what a strong couples relationship is built on. You can read more in this article: Let’s talk frankly.
Love or no love?
It is not necessary to speculate all your life about the behavior of your husband and consider him a being from another planet. You can take a different path – the path of psychological literacy. Understand the features and characteristics of their husbands: why is he like this, but I am different? Why did my husband suddenly say that he does not love me – is it really so, or the reason for it is something else? And what are the actual signs that the husband does not love his wife.
Each person has certain psychological qualities called vectors. They form our character and habits, give our features to the way we perceive the world.
For a woman with a visual vector it is especially important to have a great love in a relationship. For her the very meaning of life is in love. And if there is no love, then life is not nice. For a visual woman it is very scary to lose the feelings of the loved one – it is tantamount to the loss of the meaning of life. If there is a suspicion in her soul that her husband does not love, it will endlessly bind and torment her from the inside.
“They love with their eyes” is about us.
Romantic expressions of love are very important for the visual woman: flowers, compliments, pleasant surprises. Words of admiration and tender eyes of the beloved. And if she is paired with a man with a visual vector – they will easily understand each other. But there can be another situation when her husband has no this vector or has other dominant vectors. And his manifestations of love will be different.
Signs when a husband does not love his wife: myths and truth.
If a man does not give flowers, does not behave romantically – perhaps he just does not have a visual vector. It just does not occur to him that this is the way to express his feelings and that it is so important to you.
If he spends a lot of time at work, often stay late and take work at home – do not be quick to suspect that he was cheating or cooling interest. This is often the way men with a skin vector – producers and workaholics by nature. For them, the main manifestation of love – to climb the career ladder and provide for his wife and children at the highest level, so that the family has more than others have.
If the husband does not accept all these “calf tenderness,” and his love is shown by actions, care for the family and children – most likely, you got the owner of anal vector. It is not easy to be affectionate and show your feelings, but he is an ideal father and reliable family man, and will always be your strongest rear.
If your lover is often withdrawn and aloof, is immersed in his own thoughts and can seem to forget about you – this does not mean that you are not important to him. Such behavior can be a sign of a sound vector. Sonic people may have a storm of emotions inside, but outside – not a single muscle will tremble on the stone face. They are often focused inside, on their thoughts. And if the person is not aware of his sound vector and does not realize himself, he may become increasingly detached and depressed. Attempts to rouse him and pull him out of the cocoon of his own thoughts will cause him to react irritably, and in an impulse he may even yell out that he hates his wife (or “you all” in general). But what he’s really screaming about is his internal shortcomings.
So are we from different planets or not?
Many of the seeming signs that a husband has fallen out of love, in fact, are not. But without realizing it, we interpret our beloved’s behavior in our own way, through ourselves: when I love, I want to do “something.” And if he does not want to do it – then he does not love. We draw the wrong conclusions and get offended, we start to wind ourselves up. And instead of listening to the other person, we become even more distant, we hurt each other.
Fortunately, today there is a technique that helps you accurately know and understand your husband. Once and for all unravel the mysteries of his behavior. Independently find an answer to the question: my husband does not love his wife, or it just seems to her? Moreover, to help restore interest and tenderness to each other. Training “System-vector psychology” Yuri Burlan has already helped hundreds of women to keep their families and resurrect the love of her husband:
“I suddenly found the love of my life in my husband that I couldn’t even dream of…”
“Before the training I thought I had made a big mistake committing my life with my husband. Now I can describe my condition as follows: “What a fool I was! He’s my genius. “
“My relationship with my husband is great! We’ve been married for nine years, and a year ago we were thinking about divorce. Now we’re living like we’re on our honeymoon. “
Why doesn’t my husband love me and what to do?
Hello, dear readers. In this article you will learn what to do if your husband does not love his wife. You will become aware of the reasons why this can happen. You will learn what signs indicate that a man’s feelings have cooled down.
Why the husband has fallen out of love
You should understand that the disappearance of love must be preceded by something. In some cases, the blame falls on the shoulders of the woman herself, who does not cope with the role of a good wife.
- Constant quarrels and conflicts in the family kill the man’s feelings.
- The wife turned out to be a bad hostess, the house is a mess.
- The woman is a bad cook. As you know, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.
- The wife often reproaches and criticizes. Over time, the man gets tired of it and his feelings go out.
- The wife stopped attracting a man because of changes in appearance.
- The wife is not spending enough time with her partner. The woman stopped showing her feelings, caressing her spouse, taking care of him. The husband feels a strong lack of feminine warmth and over time loses interest in a man who does not nurture feelings of affection.
- The man has a new lover, and feelings for his spouse have temporarily faded.
- There is a loss of respect from the wife. Men are overreacting to this.
- The wife’s level is no longer appropriate. The man is evolving and the woman is not.
- You began to spend too little time together, feelings have dulled, there is no emotional intimacy.
- Problems in intimate life. The woman is not satisfying her partner’s needs.
- In fact, there has never been any feelings, the man fooled himself.
Characteristic manifestations
Let’s consider, the husband does not love his wife, the signs of this condition.
- The man has become irritable, literally on a blank spot begins to turn on, freaks out. He does not like how cooked soup or poorly cleaned floor. At first he reproaches his spouse, then he begins to turn to insults.
- The man has stopped consulting in making decisions, such as changing jobs, moving, business trips, repairs, summer vacations.
- Husband stopped touching his spouse, no longer hugs, kisses, does not hold hands during walks.
- Indifferent behavior of the man, his withdrawal and unwillingness to comply with any requests of the spouse.
- Completely lacking a sense of compassion. Husband does not help when he sees that the spouse is hard to do something, does not care about her when she is sick.
- Has stopped respecting his wife.
- Instead of positive emotions, his wife’s stories cause only irritation.
- The man stopped making gifts, giving flowers.
- No longer feels jealous of his partner, she has become indifferent to him.
- My husband is disappearing more and more often to work or go out with friends. Most importantly, he is hardly ever at home, because he does not want to be near his wife, he tries to reduce the amount of time they spend together.
- He stopped being interested in his spouse in an intimate way. It is possible that he began to cheat.
However, it should be taken into account that the emergence of one or more signs can be explained not only by the disappearance of feelings, but also by other factors:
- difficulties at work;
- health problems;
- a strong nervous shock;
- the depressing monotony of everyday life;
- Improper behavior of the wife.
What to do
- If your spouse’s feelings have dulled because you spend too much time at work and practically leave him without attention, think about it, maybe it’s time to change your priorities if you want to keep your family.
- If the feelings of her husband cooled because you have changed externally, for example, gained a lot of extra weight, stopped to look after themselves, you need to do everything to transform and regain their former attractiveness.
- Perhaps the interest of his spouse lost because you stopped developing, he was bored to be around uneducated person, it’s time to think about their self-development.
- If the culprit is the inability to keep order in the house, it’s time to pull yourself together and start coping with household chores.
- If you can not cook and what at the beginning of married life your husband turned a blind eye, now caused great disappointment, it’s time to seek help from mom, mother-in-law or girlfriends to help master the new skills or enroll in cooking classes.
- Spend as much free time as possible with your spouse. If possible, send the children on weekends to relatives. This way you will be able to spend a whole day alone.
- Maybe his man lacks your support, your care, start praising him, talk about how much you love him, thank him for everything he has done and is doing.
- It is possible that his feelings have disappeared because there were constant squabbles, arguments and fights in your home. Man simply began to treat you badly. Change yourself, show that life can be calm, quiet, and a cozy home.
- Start to show interest in his life, hobbies, aspirations. Encourage them.
- Make sure not to violate the boundaries of personal space of her husband.
- If feelings in the man completely cooled, you can let him go. Perhaps he will be able to think things from a distance and realize that he was wrong, his love is not going anywhere. If not back, then it’s time for a divorce. You are also still able to arrange a personal life.
Now you know if your husband does not love his wife, what signs tell about it. Do not hurry to get upset, try to find reasons, adequate explanations for this. You may still be able to change everything, if your husband has grown cold through your fault. The main thing is not to give up, and try to return the former feelings of a spouse.