Is it worth it to get involved with a married man

14 reasons not to get involved with married men

How often girls, when they despair (or do not even try) to find a man, get involved with those who already have a family. Some of them think that they can take a man away from his lawful wife, some of them think that this relationship is temporary and that she will search for “the one” on the way, and some of them even agree inwardly that they won’t get more anyway, because all the good men are already taken.

Well, I will try to dispel the daydreams and tell you about the consequences of such relationships, so that everyone can make an informed decision about whether she needs it or not.

Reason number one.

If you think that sooner or later the man you choose will leave his wife and become yours, I’m going to upset you. The likelihood of that happening is close to zero. Yes, he may tell you that his relationship with his wife is absolutely terrible, that he doesn’t love her, that he suffers by staying with her. And even that he’s going to get a divorce. If you’ve been in that relationship for a couple of months, you can still believe it. But if you’ve been hearing it for a year. Think about it. More often than not, it’s noodling to get pity and tie you down. Practice shows that men very rarely leave their wives for new women–that’s one. And when they do, they often come back, that’s two. The reason is very simple. He has an established, familiar world, and no matter how bad it is, it’s his world, and it’s familiar and clear to him – it’s his comfort zone. By the way, you have to understand that this world is bad, it can be a complete fabrication. And if he has you and so – you can come to you at any time, to get warmth, affection, attention and care, and then go back to his wife – why change anything? Just imagine the consequences and what a man would have to go through if he actually decided to leave his family. Seriously – imagine that. Why would he need all that?

So when choosing a married man to be in a relationship, you have to realize that he is NOT going to be with you, and you will be constantly sharing him with your wife. And that’s chronic jealousy, resentment and crying into your pillow. Holidays alone, waiting your turn, and eternal second place. Ready?

And even if you have living examples where a woman has stolen a man from his family and he now lives with her or even married her, remember – these are the exception that proves the rule.

The next few reasons follow from the first.

If you take it for granted that such a man won’t be yours anyway, it’s obvious that in this relationship you’ll just be WASTING YOUR TIME – wasting your life on someone else’s man. Instead of working on yourself and looking for a suitable partner to create a full-fledged family, you will spend years in useless waiting and, of course, you will most likely grow old and be left alone in the end.

Think about it – if you are always in second place, if on holidays he chooses not you, but another woman, if anything happens, he leaves everything, including you, and runs home. Do you think you would feel wanted, loved, needed, valued in such a life. Probably not. And that’s a very serious blow to your ego. And even if you are able to get over this at the moment, understanding that this is a normal course of things in such a situation, in the long run it will lead to a strong LOWERING of your self-esteem. The consequence will be that you will not be able to feel worthy and confident and will not be able to present yourself in a good way to other men. It will also affect all other areas of life. It’s also very painful in and of itself. Do you want it all?

Not as obvious as the previous one, but perhaps even more significant. Being constantly in the second role, and not being the first and only one for the chosen man, you CHOOSE to live this way – to be second. And in your subconscious, you get the idea that you can do it that way! And that becomes your comfort zone. It is very difficult to move after that into a normal, fulfilling relationship. Firstly, because certain patterns of behavior have already been established, and secondly, because your subconscious mind will constantly give out the usual scheme – that you are the second. And for you, this will be the natural and normal state of affairs. And even if you break up your current relationship and try to create a new one, your subconscious will be happy to help you find a married man again!

Even if you’re not in a relationship with a married man, I think you have a rough idea of what’s waiting for you there. So let’s think about it. Okay, being with a man is bliss. But if he’s not yours, and you’re constantly settling for leftovers of his attention, will you really be happy? It’s a kind of incomplete happiness. And your dissatisfaction with the situation, your resentment and your desire for more will constantly make itself felt. Sometimes it will break out and you’ll make a scandal and showdown for the man of your choice, which, of course, worsen your relationship. But more often you will just cry into your pillow, realizing that nothing can change. What is the risk? Chronic background dissatisfaction will cause stress – in the emotions and in the body, and it is psychosomatic and the inevitable HEALTH problems and constant going to the doctor. Plus negative emotions and tension have a huge impact on your appearance – facial features change (as you know, not for the better), and the aging process goes much faster. As a consequence there is a decrease of the physical rating and the probability to attract the attention of a worthy man, and a possible decrease of the interest of the already existing one. From this even more tension and frustration – and you get into a vicious circle. More precisely – in a spiral, on which you steadily go down.

It’s well known. A relationship with a married man is a SIN from the point of view of religion. If you are not a believer, you can skip this point. But if you are a believer, it requires no further explanation for you.

Not as well-known and obvious, but it’s there. Having a relationship with a married man is one of the biggest KARMIC WRONGS. Without going into too much detail, you are essentially taking someone else’s – something that doesn’t belong to you. And every action has consequences. In this case, the sin is so serious that not only you but your children may have to pay for it.

Another non-obvious reason not to enter into such a relationship is a breakdown in your energy. In order not to complicate things, let me explain in simple terms: the system of energy exchange between a man and a woman is arranged in such a way that the man feeds on the woman and provides for his family at the expense of her energy. Ideally, he feeds off his wife and provides for her. But if he has another woman, he will also receive energy from her, but he will not give it back to her: his wife will use all his achievements. And if you are an additional woman, you will also be an additional source of energy for this man and, as a consequence, you will feed another man’s family and another woman – his wife. And she will prosper, not you. Moreover, this man will receive energy from you even after you are separated! In fact – it is a permanent channel Drain your energy into someone else’s family. Think about it, do you want to do that?

It’s for those who think they’ll be looking for the right man for themselves in parallel with the relationship. It won’t work. The fact is that when a woman gets into a relationship, she stops feeling free. Even if you know in your mind that this is temporary and that you need another man, on a subconscious level everything is different. You begin to think differently, behave differently, act differently – as a woman who already has a man! YOU’RE ALREADY BUSY! It’s a property of the psyche. And all your actions will correspond to this state.

Besides, this effect is not only expressed in your actions – it is a constant vibration, the vibration of a busy woman. And even if you manage to control your behavior, on a deeper level you will still be read that you belong to someone. And men will feel the same way on a subconscious level, and relationships won’t work out. This is an energy issue and it is impossible to control it. Accordingly, the chances of meeting your man while in a relationship are practically zero.

And there is another danger here that no one can avoid. We get attached to the men we sleep with. This is inevitable. It’s also a characteristic of the psyche. The female psyche. And if at the beginning of the relationship you will still think that you are in principle free, that you will look for another man and you will easily break up with him, then after a while you will notice that you do not want to look for someone else, because you love and appreciate this man, you are used to him. And all the others are strangers and you don’t want them. And on top of it all – everyone you get acquainted with (if you don’t stop getting acquainted at all), you will be comparing them with what you supposedly already have. And I assure you – all others will be worse! Not because they really are worse, but because this one is already native. And this is a very serious trap.

In addition to the previous one. The logic of the universe. If you said yes to a married man, the Universe stops looking for opportunities for you to meet “the one”-the place is already taken, after all! You’ve agreed to the worst. What’s the point of straining. This is the law of freedom of choice, and you take that step yourself – you choose a married man, DENYING THAT MORE FITTING OPTIONS. As long as you’re free, and there’s room for you, the Universe is looking for a mate for you. But if you’ve given that space to someone else, you don’t stand a chance of getting what you really want – a free man to create a full-fledged family – alas.

It is for those who think that all normal men are already occupied. This is where I urge you to be logical. You’re dating a married man. He’s dating you. In essence, he’s cheating on his wife. Do you think he’s normal? For some reason, it seems to me that a decent man would NOT go out with his wife.

The following two reasons are for those who are still hoping to steal a man away from their family and sincerely believe it is possible.

It flows out of the previous one. If a man has cheated on his woman with you and even left his family for you, I hope you realize that after a while you may end up with another woman in your place and you end up in his wife’s place. After all, he already did that once! Are you willing to live with a man and be constantly afraid that someone will steal him away from you just like you once did?

In addition to the twelfth. Here I will return to the laws of the universe and Karma-no one has abolished them. Consequently, the likelihood of people trying to steal your man, your husband, like you once did, is very high. Think about it. This will not only affect the man you stole from another family. Even if you start a new relationship with a free man, there is a great chance that someone else will be attracted to him, and that girl will be as active and enterprising as you were and won’t hesitate to take what is not hers either.

Also applies to a woman’s energy. And it doesn’t just apply to married men, but to any relationship “about nothing” in general – which leads to nothing in the first place.

The more men a woman has had, the less energy she has. If you think of a woman’s energy as an apple, then every man she has been with takes a very tangible bite out of that apple. And if you take into account that the channel of energy drainage without doing certain practices remains open even after the end of the relationship, you can understand what a woman’s energy losses are. It turns out that when you meet your one and only, he will get a bitten off apple, if not a single stump at all. As for the married man, see point one – he won’t be with you anyway. And while in a relationship with a free man there is a chance that he will get all that apple anyway, in the case of a married man, you just give him a bite.

I’ll end here and hope you now have enough information to make an informed decision.

An affair with a married man: is it worth it or can’t the heart tell?

Some argue that an affair with a married man is doomed to failure. Others, by contrast, vehemently defending this relationship, arguing their position on the freedom of everyday family life. In this matter there is no right and wrong. Each girl chooses her own path, depending on what she expects from such a union.

But one thing is certain – a woman who decided to take such a step, must have a strong character, otherwise the relationship with a married man will quickly grow for her from a pleasant, titillating adventure to the endless worries and dashed hopes. About the possible pros and cons, successes and failures of the novel with a married man you read in our material.

Psychology of relations with a married man

A girl has fallen in love with a married man. It is important not to think that life is over. After all, the fact that you fell in love with a man who is not free, not necessarily your fault. You need to understand how he came into your life. Suddenly, it was no accident.

Help a few questions to ask yourself:

    Why did this connection happen in my life?

Many women are well aware that being a mistress is not good, yet they continue to date married men. Why do you do it? Live in the moment or make far-reaching plans? Analyze soberly this situation and give yourself an honest answer to the question, why do you need an affair with a married man?

Here and now – you are free people who are good together, you are passionate lovers, you are pervaded by an unknown dependence, and sometimes some financially unsustainable. Are you attracted to a relationship without commitment?

Admit to yourself, do you care about having a legitimate wife for your lover? Or if, on the contrary, you prefer a free relationship.

Do you worry about the possibility of a joint future as you look at your relationship at a time when passions subside.

It is only in jokes we laugh funny about the secret relationship on the other side of the marriage. In fact, every woman, as a mistress, is constantly experiencing an inner struggle with herself. Each time she steps over the forbidden line, stepping over herself. She is tormented by the thought that after their rendezvous, the man returned to the house where his lawful spouse is waiting for him.

Most likely, you have some internal problems of a psychological nature, if you keep choosing in the objects of his love married. In fact, this is an existence in the background of someone else’s life, you will always be in the background, in the shadows. Mistresses are asked not to call and not to write, to forget their favorite perfume. Not everyone is to their liking.

Depends on what scenario your relationship develops, but often it is a woman looking for ways to organize a meeting. Lives in the hope that he will, after all, leave his wife. And it’s not a fact that he needs it. Suffer from the relationship in the end only you.

You should always be fun and easy, a woman without problems and worries for his beloved.

Women amuse themselves with the fact that they are better than his wife, because he prefers her over me. And wives live in ignorance while he goes to me. But all of these “self-beliefs” break down in reality when your lover returns from you to her.

At first, building a relationship with a married man, you are literally flying on wings, you are desired and loved. You take a profitable position: it is not you who are cheating, but his wife. But over time it becomes more and more difficult for you to share a man with a legitimate wife. And the loved one does not want to leave her.

In this case, falling in love women risk to turn into a kind of dependence, she seizes jealousy, wanting to take a man out of the family, constantly proving his superiority to his wife. The lady loses herself in this cycle of concern to capture her partner, her whole interest is focused only on him. It becomes like madness.

The positives and negatives of an affair with a married man

Let’s identify the moments that embarrass a girl in an affair with a married man:

  • It is a relationship with no prospects for the future . You may be entertaining hopes that he will leave his wife for you, but this outcome is unlikely. A married man’s office romance in this situation is quite convenient for the latter. Living in two houses is even beneficial: he is loved everywhere, they are waiting for him and literally throw themselves at his feet. So why stop all this?
  • It will be difficult for you to live, turning into a shadow: constantly hide your feelings, hide from acquaintances, try to make sure that no gossip about you did not reach his wife.
  • Be prepared for weekends and holidays alone, which will not help to brighten up your family and friends. The man will not be able to congratulate you on the holidays day to day, at most to whisper congratulations to you secretly from his wife on the phone. New Year’s Day, International Women’s Day, Valentine’s Day you have to meet alone with yourself and your inferiority complexes unnecessary.
  • You will be jealous of the man to his wife, no matter how ridiculous it may sound. After all, their life is your dream. When you can looklessly and unashamedly go to the theater, a cafe, go to visit friends or go on vacation. Not to mention the nightly pleasures, when there are no time constraints and flinch from the sudden call.
  • Your meetings are doomed to secret places, as far away from prying eyes and ears as possible . All on the run, all under a seal of secrecy. You will have to put up with his fond conversations with his wife, while you will have to turn into a silent and powerless wall.
  • For him, his family will always come first, you are unlikely to be able to break this . You have to figure it out for yourself: are you ready to be on the bench all the time and get only half of the relationship? You either have to accept the situation or stop the relationship.
  • Yes, as a rule, lovers are driven by passion, by impulse. But no matter how hot the beginning, sooner or later you will begin to get used to it, you will want more. You will begin to be annoyed by his hurry, a million urgent matters, disregard for your problems. In fact, all comes down to the fact that you will meet only for intimacy. And your questions about the serene future together man or hush, reduced to the fact that so far it is not the time, we must postpone discussion until tomorrow. Or immediately give you a harsh message that there is no prospect and can not be. All he can give you is here and now. A woman sits alone, waiting for a window in her lover’s schedule for her.

Men look at such relationships as an affair between a married woman and a married man somewhat differently. Some do not accept such relationships in principle; the institution of marriage is important and valuable to them. Others see it as a kind of adventure, which is vital for strengthening the marriage, being a splash of emotion. Still others are satisfied with pictures of half-naked beauties in adult magazines.

Questions such relationships are many, as well as the pros and cons. But many young ladies choose this type of relationship because they are not in a hurry to get married, and this option seems particularly suitable for them.

So why do girls tend to choose a married man as a lover?

  • They are healthier. Such men have fewer outside intimacies, they are the most positive in all areas, including drinking less alcohol and not abusing smoking.
  • Such men rarely get genital infections – they watch out for this point, because they have a responsibility for themselves and their spouse. This is a big plus.
  • “Married man” is easier to capture his passion, he is easily excitable. Your meetings give him an incredible drive and a storm of extreme emotions! After all, your couple is always at risk of being exposed.
  • The man tries to always be on top, because each of your meetings, as the last chance. Mistakes are unacceptable, his blood is boiling – he’s a male superhero! And he must look like one. This at home he can walk in tights with elongated knees, but here – no.

And on the other hand, there are women who are quite established in life, they simply do not need a life and family problems. A lover in this case is a perfect solution to their problems.

Such ladies live beautifully. They have the whole world at their feet – expensive restaurants and resorts, lots of successful men around them. They dress in boutiques, drive luxurious cars, live in a perpetual feast.

In this case, an affair with a married man is only good – it does not limit the freedom of action and movement.

And the washing of shirts and arrows on pants we leave to the wife. The mistress gets the cream – fantastic sex, gifts, a life without inhibitions, conflict and jealousy.

Let’s talk about the pros that will help you decide if you need a relationship with a married man:

  • Freedom . No one controls you, no one influences your choices and decisions about this or that. You can even have several men you like and not report to anyone.
  • You will learn to understand people, yourself. Look at the relationship from a different angle – an opportunity for self-improvement and personal development.
  • The man can be a very interesting companion, you can not only spend time exclusively for sexual pleasures, but also for talking . You expand your horizons. If it succeeds, you visit exhibitions together, go to the theater or a restaurant.
  • Romance, passion, no home cares and problems. Your meetings will be an unforgettable adventure, let your imagination run wild. Whereas in marriage we are more often met with the solution of domestic issues, romance and passion sometimes come to naught.
  • Burst of emotion and energizing you get from an affair with a married man. Psychologist tips say that if you understand even a little bit of the psychology of the relationship, then you can easily translate them from a purely physical to emotional.
  • Gifts and gifts from a generous knight – another nice bonus. Allow yourself to enjoy attention, including in the form of material goods.

Three signs of a losing affair with a married man beforehand

Remember that an affair with a married man is a big responsibility. There are the interests and rights of the legitimate spouse involved. Since ancient times people say: you can not build your own happiness on another’s misfortune. Of course, if you are driven solely by a mutual desire to meet for the sake of casual pastime, then maybe it’s not such a problem. But more often it is a complicated relationship, the outcome of which is very uncertain.

Let’s think together, do these relationships have a chance to succeed?

It is quite possible. The man went to look for a new woman for some reason: a surge of emotion, a thirst for adventure and new sensations. You could have hooked him sexually, with his soul, the direct opposite of his spouse. But keep in mind, when you take the place of the lawful wife, the situation could happen again. So how to identify unpromising relationships:

  • The man is agonizing, he’s tossing and turning, he has no clarity in his preferences. Most likely, he will choose his spouse. On the principle that the bird in the hand is much more reliable than the crane in the sky.
  • There’s no trust in the relationship. Maybe he just wanted a break from the boring life and, except for temporary meetings without commitment, he did not need anything else?
  • The only thing on his mind is sex. Relationships built on this basis, uniquely unpromising. Cut off the shoulder right away, otherwise it will only hurt later.

Nevertheless, many women are looking for excuses for these futile relationships, trying every way to keep them.

Four tips on how to keep a married man for longer

You are unlikely to be able to tame and bind a strong man. Representatives of the stronger sex are very scrupulous in their choice of a partner. Here are important not only spectacular appearance, but also intelligence, resolution of domestic issues, intimacy and much more. However, there are still ways that you can try to keep a married man:

  1. Become the person closest to him . Open up to him, he will be yours. A rare man will be able to share with you weaknesses, difficulties, representatives of the stronger sex are very secretive in this regard. When you become a reliable friend for him, consider that half of the job is done.
  2. Do not put pressure on him. A man can run away from the family because of the strong pressure from his wife. Take the opposite position. Be a friend, a humble counselor. He needs support.
  3. Don’t force him to make a choice. Let him decide for himself. He should be lured by your relaxed, passionate, sincere.
  4. Be quiet. Happiness loves silence, no matter how clichéd it may sound. Watch the man, his attitude and feelings. Catch the moment when he is ready, and boldly declare yourself. Show that you are interested in him and ready to go through any difficulties on the way to happiness.

This is a small part of the options that help you position and firmly bind to a married man. All in your hands, be wise and unobtrusive. Note that not always a woman craves strong relationships, sometimes the initiative comes from a man.

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