Here we are: how to tell if a married man has fallen in love with you, but is still hiding it
Married men also fall in love. Tips from psychologists will help you to analyze your environment for the presence of men in love, but engaged. Also, experts will tell you what to do in this situation.
A married man is very different from the free man. He does not need to attract a lot of attention, because he has a lot to lose. Someone who is engaged, but in love with another woman, will try to hide it by any means. That is why you will have to be more careful to discern such notes in the behavior of an acquaintance or colleague. Many say that it is better to be a happy mistress than an unhappy wife, but psychologists advise to think twice before you respond to the betrothed man in return.
He finds reasons to talk or be together
If they are his wife’s girlfriends, he will be happy to host them. Even if his wife is around, he will be happy to have a pretty lady in the same room as him. He is always glad to see you at his home or in the company of his wife.
In addition, he may call you or write to you for some personal reason. Your girlfriend’s husband, who is in love with you, will try to establish a friendly relationship with you.
He shows interest in your affairs
He wants to know what’s going on in your life, what you like, what music you listen to, what movies you watch. The only thing he definitely won’t start a conversation about is your man, if there is one. Of course, he can support such a conversation, but no way he will be interested in your partner.
Jokes with you and treats you differently.
Jokes, humor, and attempts to cheer you up are all clear signs that he wants to be special to you. This doesn’t seem like a direct show of affection on his part, so he’s sure to try to show all his wit.
He may call you something special – to form a new form of your name or give you a cute nickname. On this psychologists advise to always pay special attention.
He can give you a ride home, if you work together. He helps you in everything. All men show sincere and pure feelings in such a way. If you slightly hint that you need help, he will be at the forefront to provide support.
He listens to you, speaks little and chooses his words very carefully. This can be explained by the fact that a married man in love does not want to hurt you or hurt his feelings. This is a very important indicator of his love.
If you work together, he will try to help in some way in terms of business. If you are a friend of his spouse, he may constantly offer to make tea, coffee or go to the store for sweets. True, you can’t rely only on this sign: perhaps the man was simply brought up in a hospitable family.
For him, you are special.
In a conversation at the communal table or in company, he will begin to allocate you more often than others. This will be noticeable by how often he turns to you, on what occasions.
He may even make some non-verbal compliments. For example, you didn’t make a very funny joke, and he is the only one who laughed. Be sure to watch for such actions. Also, if he jokes himself, he will definitely look in your direction to see if you are laughing.
Other important indicators of his crush
Touching . He absolutely will not miss a chance to touch you. He can use any excuse to do so, but he will be very careful here as well.
A smile . This sign can never be ruled out. Even his eyes will smile. They will glow with tenderness when he smiles.
Gaze . He will look at you more often than necessary. Be sure to look at him by suddenly shifting your gaze to his eyes. If you notice that he often looks in your direction, he is in love.
How to behave if you realized he is in love with you
The most important rule is not to talk to him about it. Do not ruin the relationship if you are not ready to give him love and warmth. Let him continue to behave as he pleases and is comfortable. Don’t accentuate this so he doesn’t get in trouble with his wife.
Do not start flirting with him, because you can destroy the family and other people’s relationships. Let him make his own decisions. If you are also in love with him, and in this case it is worth to remain neutral.
If suddenly his behavior begins to be noticeable to you, then it is noticeable to all. It is necessary to calmly and diplomatically hint to him that he is behaving inappropriately. Men at such moments as if waking up and really realize that they are betraying their spouse.
As for the view from the wife of such a man, all spouses are advised by psychologists to take advantage of tips on how not to miss the possible beginning of an affair by her husband.
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Signs of falling in love on the part of a married man
“Love pops up when you weren’t expecting it at all…,” is a classic that many married couples are familiar with. Indeed, it erupts even where it would seem impossible, where the relationship is formed and life is predetermined. And as divorce statistics show, getting married does not mean loving the same one all your life! Today, let’s talk about the male population: how can a woman understand that a married man has flashed feelings for her?
Married man in love: the main signs
People in love practically do not know how to control themselves, so it is quite easy to understand, really in love with you or it is a banal desire to diversify their married life. Look closely, observe, feel, and everything will become clear to you at once!
The main signs of a married man in love:
The behavior of a married man who has fallen in love with an unmarried chosen one can vary from extreme to extreme, it all depends on his inner mood, temperament and external circumstances. From the outside it always seems strange: the man in love wins the attention of his assertiveness, increased attention, a sense of humor, then suddenly it becomes cold, avoids meetings, turns away his eyes. So if before you could easily joke, chat, say hello, and after a while you suddenly stopped noticing, it’s a sign that the man is trying to hide or suppress his budding feelings (he is tormented by remorse, fear of the unknown, etc.)!
The next sign that a man has fallen in love will be to show his best side. Since ancient times, the male part of the population conquered the second halves by demonstrating their strength, power, cunning, dexterity, so that men have it on an instinctive level. If at the sight of a desirable woman a married man suddenly starts to be clever, philosophical, joking incessantly, showing his expensive tie (gold watch, luxury car), demonstrating his economic activity, subconsciously he says: “Look at me, I am a leader! What I can do! How I can!”.
Increased attention to his person will also help to know if a man loves you, if he is already married. This allocation of the environment (constantly turning to the object of admiration, seeking support, approval), looking for an excuse to be alone (an offer to meet at work in an informal setting), “casual” meetings (“like, you go to this time, too?”), the excessive care, unreasonable interest (what he likes, from what city, where he studied, what he dreams about).
Some desperate catfishermen may even flirt with the woman they love in the presence of their legitimate chosen one, arguing for a friendly attitude. “Are you jealous of Katya? I specifically invited her to my birthday party to introduce her to a colleague. Yes, I was not flirting with her, it’s just an ordinary attempt to defuse the atmosphere! And I went after her in the kitchen to help wash dishes, because you were busy with the guests. By the way, alone a man stays with the beloved woman just to enjoy her presence, there may not be any sexual connotations.
If you and a man are quite normal, but in the presence of his wife, he pretends to see you for the first time (it becomes dry, nervous, cold), this is the most obvious sign of his warm attitude towards you.
To understand that a married man has fallen in love with you, will help his actions directed in your direction. Usually, a man in love becomes caring, participative, shows all his gallantry and good breeding – open the door to the building, bring coffee, move the table, help with a big report, give you a hand, hold an umbrella, carry a heavy pile of papers, let you go ahead. If a woman with whom a man is in love is in trouble, he will always come to the rescue, will connect his connections, will fulfill his promises even at a loss to himself.
Also a sign of being in love is considered a man’s desire to protect his loved ones, to protect them, to protect them from possible misfortune. There appears a special name / nickname, which the gentleman in love awards his potential chosen one.
Married men who are determined to show their love, are more daring in their actions: they openly surprise women with surprises, take them to restaurants, filled with gifts. But in response, they will also require you to total commitment, coming into a frenzy at the mere thought that you can connect your life with someone else!
Find out if a married man loves you or it’s just a passing sympathy, will help his eyes. Gaze of a man in love under any circumstances directed to the desired woman, it is the law! What will be the look, depends on external factors and the nature of men, but it will be present in any case.
If a guy is hiding his feelings, he will look fluent and embarrassed, and if you respond with direct eye contact, he will immediately lower his eyes. He always looks, even when standing half-turned away from a pretty girl, when talking to another person, when someone else focuses attention on himself (the director speaks at a meeting, someone tells a funny joke, a guest star sings at a corporate party, etc.). And if he sharply withdraws his gaze from you, it is a sign that he is afraid to admit his feelings and you, and himself, and others.
A more determined man shows his love long studying glance (which lasts at least 10 seconds), and the eyes read interest, excitement, tenderness, care, passion. If you notice that with you constantly trying to make direct eye contact, you know, you really are seriously interested!
To check whether a married man has fallen in love with you, pay attention to him during joint communication. The most important sign is sincerity. Usually the single suitors like to rush sweet talk to arrange a companion to himself: “I never met a more amazing woman,” “I and my wife for six months living in different areas, so consider that I’m single,” “Every night you come to me in a dream,” “Do not plan your summer vacation, I will take you away from people where it will be just me, you and the sea. If you hear from a married man such empty speeches, it is unlikely that he truly fell in love, rather the words of a born lady’s man.
But if your partner asks more than he tells, is interested in your life with pleasure, observes you with interest during the conversation, enjoys the pleasant company, there is a place for feelings. If the companion talks about a difficult period in life, he will empathize (the corners of his lips will droop, his eyes will become anxious, his posture will be tense), if positive things are pouring from his lips, he will immediately share with her joy.
A telltale sign of a married man in love is that he tries at all times to get a woman to talk to him privately.
To understand that a married man is in love with you will help to observe his non-verbal signals. They come from the depths of the subconscious, so it is impossible to hide these signs.
First, a man in love always tries to look at the highest level in front of the desired woman, so when you see her, he straightens his back, pulls back his jacket, fixes his hair, draws in his belly, glancing at his appearance.
Secondly, the appearance of favorite person in sight automatically raises the mood of the man. So if he involuntarily appears on the face smiling, his posture becomes open and relaxed (a signal of psychological comfort), one eyebrow raised reflexively in pleasant surprise – you obviously have something more than a friendly liking.
Third, a man in love constantly tends to be turned on his face, knees, and body toward his beloved, even if they are just in the same room. If people are communicating, the most obvious signs of great feelings are considered dilation of the pupils, copying the posture of the interlocutor, tilting the body in her direction. The most “screaming” gestures are considered to be the scrolling of the wedding finger and putting the thumbs behind the belt of the pants. So the man sends a signal that he is ready to consciously break marital fidelity, and he wants to do this only with you!
Another symptom of a married man in love is the constant desire to touch the object of adoration. It can be as purposeful touching the hair, back, shoulders, supporting the elbow, as well as accidental touching with the hands. It really can be a coincidence, and the tactile contact is unintentional, but if a member of the fair sex notices that it happens regularly and is present even where it could have been done without it, then it is a sign of true love!
If a married man has serious feelings for a girl, he constantly strives to be with her: going to the same store, sitting next to her at the morning meeting, running into the same cafe during lunch break, etc. At the same time, these meetings are always accompanied by light physical contact. Touching your loved one is a normal physiological reaction! By the way, if you seriously like a married man, he will subconsciously reach for your hair to feel them to the touch, to breathe the fragrance.
What a girl do in love with a married man
When you have determined by obvious signs that sincerely attracted to a married man, you have a serious decision, what to do next. Before you decide to reciprocate a busy man, think about what it may cost you. Is there any guarantee that you are the last and only love of his life? Are you ready to take a man’s children, share his budget, attention, vacations? Will your reputation suffer from a momentary decision? What are you willing to do to maintain this relationship, to develop it? What sacrifices will you make for it?
While you are thinking carefully about such serious things, let’s get into a little family psychology. Statistics say that married men fall in love with other ladies quite often, but leave their families for these “flashes” very rarely (1 man in 10). Keep this in mind and don’t be in a hurry to agree to such a relationship ahead of time.
If you by circumstances do not intersect with a married man, cut it off at the root. Out of sight – out of mind! First, in such a relationship a woman risks a lot of trouble (wives like to assert their own), and secondly, because of the nervous breakdown, the constant worrying, resentment, stress, sooner or later she will earn a serious health problem. So, alas, there is nothing to gain here.
If you can avoid contact with a concerned married man is not possible (he is your boss, colleague, friend, classmate), develop a particular strategy of behavior:
- distance yourself from the man in love if possible (step back, sit down during the meeting, avoid eye contact, keep conversations to a minimum, refuse to help);
- Spread the word about your affair with a man, and for reassurance, ask a friend to meet you at work;
- Turn your attention to another man in the team (even if the lover will be angry, he will not deal with you about it because the situation himself is quite piquant).
If a married man openly admits his feelings, frankly talk to him, make it clear that between you nothing can happen! Not under any circumstances!
“Well, what if it’s love?”, you ask… If this is the same feeling that consumes all thoughts, makes you forget about everything, gives you strength and allows you to breathe, then you know what to do!