Lover does not want to communicate – how to understand his behavior
So, you have a man. You are reverently waiting for each date, fluttering like a butterfly on the wings of love and dreaming of a joint happy future, which is sure to be bright. The relationship becomes closer, and it seems to you that this is forever.
But suddenly you find that your man can afford to cancel a date or disappear for a few days without explanation. The lover does not want to communicate? What can indicate that this may indicate how to understand his behavior and behave correctly? Do I have to try to get a loved one or cut him out of your life? Read more about this.
Reasons why a married lover does not want to communicate
Relationships with married men often begin with an active courtship. A woman, seeing all the risks of the situation, at first refuses to meet, but the man does not give in, bribing his persistence and convincing in the sincerity of intentions and determination to end his marriage. In the end, the girl decides to trust and give such a confident beau a chance.
So why then does the lover not want to communicate with the woman he so zealously pursued? Possible reasons:
He got what he wanted, and the goal is no longer so attractive. The woman’s rejections at the beginning of the relationship aroused excitement, but when he has achieved a certain success, his interest is no longer fueled by anything – he becomes bored.
A long relationship with a married lover does not indicate that he will end up staying with you. Rather the opposite. If in the first months of communication a man did not talk about formalizing your relationship, there is a high probability that he will not be ready for this step ever again. His promises and assurances to the contrary may sound completely sincere, but in order to create a full family, you should look for an available man. More often than not, mistresses stay in that status forever.
A man sees your relationship as just a supplement to his marriage. He is satisfied with the status quo. He gets from his mistress what he lacks at home. He assumes that everyone is happy with these conditions, since the woman agreed to be his mistress in the first place. In such a case, the man does not even think about leaving his wife or making his lawful spouse his mistress.
If a married lover doesn’t want to communicate and ignores you, it usually indicates that he has had enough of your relationship. He has taken what he needed and is no longer interested in continuing your relationship. The ex-lover is thinking of ways to end the affair.
Other reasons for a lover’s silence
To understand the reason, you need to know a lot about your relationship, such as how long it has been going on. If you have just started dating, maybe it’s because the young man has been disappointed by something in the communication, and so he’s trying to end it. If we are talking about a longer relationship, you can assume that at this point in his life some other interests besides your connection came to the fore. A lot also depends on how often you used to communicate, how open and sincere you are with each other.
Is his girlfriend his closest friend or an excuse to have fun? Do you often discuss intimate topics or spend more time in bed? These are different types of relationships in which there may be different reasons for a man’s silence. Let’s name a few of the most common ones.
The man may simply be busy with some things related to work, school, family… Perhaps he believes that at this stage of the relationship he should not report to the girl in some aspects of his life. In this case, it is better not to bother with unnecessary calls and messages, so as not to show yourself as too intrusive and not to upset your relationship.
The first crush is gone. This is noticeable in the way the nature and frequency of your meetings have changed. If before you both tried to find every free hour to spend together, now your meetings have become much rarer and shorter. The young man is increasingly busy with other urgent matters. And the meeting time drags on, not filled with seemingly anything meaningful.
Your relationship is based more on sex than on trust and intimacy. Therefore, in between meetings, it can be difficult for a man to find a reason to make contact. It is difficult to find common topics and interests. Tenderness and caring may be associated in his mind with another kind of relationship – between spouses and relatives. Your relationship he qualifies as having a different character.
Author and facilitator of women’s trainings to harmonize women’s energy. Master of the removal of limiting beliefs and master of the settlements.
I have prepared for you three lessons that will help you better understand yourself, remove the restrictions that prevent you to feel loved and live happily.
Video lesson with meditation: The 5 states of femininity
You will learn about the five feminine states that exist in every woman, how they manifest and which archetypes you have the most manifested and which are not developed.
Video lesson + meditation: How to let go of past relationships
Telling you what you need to do to free your heart from old feelings, and break the energy threads linking you to a past partner.
Audio Recording: Love Yourself Neuro Affirmation
Thanks to this neuro-affirmation you will be able to return love for yourself and feel sincere gratitude and happiness for each of your day.
The lover does not want to communicate: what to do
If a lover does not want to communicate, it can be discouraging. It’s no secret that in the wilderness of men are launched for the sake of new sensations, which they do not receive in marriage. And that is why mistresses are sometimes bestowed with more attention (and gifts) than the legitimate spouses.
But if a loved one suddenly stopped contacting or communicates dryly and briefly, it is a reason to be wary. Perhaps his wife found out about the secret connection and is now trying to confirm the affair by hook or by crook.
It is also possible that the lover simply does not want to communicate in between meetings. He is ready to scream passionately in bed, or to discuss the main characters while watching a movie together, but after he leaves your apartment, it’s as if he turned off. He ignores calls and SMS, does not respond to emails and messengers … Of course, this situation can not suit a woman. And so it’s time to “turn on the detective” and figure out why the lover does not want to communicate.
Three main reasons why a lover does not want to communicate between meetings
Very often there are conflicts between people in which the cause of the dispute is not clear. It happens that both in the heat of the moment say silly things and after a while do not remember what the argument was about. Sometimes one is offended, and the other is left wondering what happened. Love relationships are no exception. If the lover does not want to communicate, it is better not to delay and try to deal with the situation immediately. Of course, not always the partner is in contact, considering that you should know for yourself what his offense. Try to talk, analyze past events. And we will look at three common reasons why the lover does not want to communicate between meetings.
If you decide to have a relationship with a man who is married, be prepared that this relationship will depend on the internal situation in his family. If the wife suspects treason, the spouse will limit communication with the mistress as much as possible, remove all kinds of evidence. Then the lady on the side needs to go into the shadows and just wait. Call, write and try to get in touch in any way is not worth it. In such a situation you need to clearly understand that the mistress is not in the first place for the man. His wife and children are more important to him, and he is not planning to leave them for the sake of the next hobby. And in general, think about whether you need a man like this? Would you like a husband?
If a woman agrees to the role of the mistress, she must understand and accept that it is only a hobby and no more. Most likely, she will not have the right to whims, whims and privileges. A man will not tolerate various antics, leave everything in the middle of the night and go with a bouquet of flowers, invite her to romantic dates in the most beautiful places in the city. Intrusive behavior can easily provoke indifference from the stronger sex.
A lady should be wise and restrained. If you have free time, instead of searching for a lover, take time for yourself: visit a spa, go shopping, sit in a cafe with friends, go to a useful master class. In fact, perhaps this is a sign and the very moment when you should consider a serious relationship with a free man.
Resolved to play the role of the mistress and you want to keep it impregnable? Not a good tactic. A man who decides to have an affair on the side, will not be too long to woo and pursue, especially if the first sex has already happened. The main benefits that a woman can give, he gets from his spouse. But a mistress, most likely, he needs for self-assertion. “Neither one, nor the other,” the man will think and simply cut off communication with a too proud lady.
What to do if the lover does not want to communicate and ignores
In this section, we will consider why the lover does not want to communicate without explanation and how to behave in such cases:
If your lover is a businessman, then do not be surprised that he often has no time to communicate with you. Business, meetings, business trips, his wife, children – all this requires time, attention and energy. And you are just a mistress, you can wait.
At the beginning of a relationship he can secretly send you love messages, flowers and gifts. Cover up the work, but in the meantime be with you. But time is merciless and any relationship will become much easier and more relaxed in a few years or even months. Most likely, the man got what he was looking for and the passion has faded.
Face the truth at the beginning of a relationship with a married man. If all he wants from you is sex, then don’t expect anything more: intimate conversations, holidays together and messages about mad love and children together.
Remember he has a family that, whether you want it or not, comes first. He will never choose socializing with you over spending time with his children. If he calls his wife and tells her that she is lying with a fever of forty, he will drop everything and rush home. Or leave for a weekend at the cottage with his family – you can forget about your loved one for two days.
If a man is able to have a relationship on the side, do not imagine that other mistresses he will not have. Chances are, you are not the first, not the last. And now, when no one has heard from him, perhaps this is the case. Men who are in love need something new all the time. They can change his mistresses at the speed of light, periodically returning to one or the other.
If the day before you fought and he does not write, perhaps waiting for the first step of you. There are principled men who, regardless of whether they are right or wrong, will never be the first to contact. So they show that you are to blame, and if you do not give in, you will lose your partner forever. It is up to you to decide whether you agree to such a relationship or it is better to look for a free and more worthy candidate.
A man can disappear and not get in touch in force majeure situations (an accident, someone got sick, he himself was in the hospital, problems with his wife). In all such cases, he will have no time for a mistress. Although sometimes men just make up these explanations to protect themselves from any claims.
Not all men know how to explain themselves. Unfortunately, many leave without saying goodbye. And this shows their ill-manneredness, cowardice and possibly stupidity. If your lover for a long time does not write or call, most likely, he left in English.
Girls who decide to have a relationship with married men should realize that 90% of the time no one is going to leave the family. Moreover, if the wife suspected something, the spouse will do everything to dispel doubts: delete correspondence, photos, contacts, become a model family man, will rush home in the evenings, go to parent-teacher conferences, go out with children. It is worth noting that some men stop relationships with mistresses once and for all.
If the lover stopped communicating after his wife found out, think about your relationship. Do you need this man? Are you willing to waste your youth? For him, his spouse and family come first. It is possible that his wife found love correspondence or saw you together and forced her husband to cut off all contact in exchange for forgiveness and preservation of the marriage. It is good if he at least tells you about it in some way. Or maybe he’ll just disappear and never contact you again. Relationships with married men carry more risks than advantages.
But also do not discard the option when in any confusing situations lover covers his wife. After all, it’s so convenient. If he is bored with you, he just says that he can no longer continue the relationship, because his wife was caught cheating. Do not be upset, you need to know how to let go of unnecessary people. Occupy yourself and build a new relationship with a free man.
Is it worth it to return a lover
If one adheres to moral principles, one should not enter into a relationship with a married man at all. But romance, passion and feelings of love are so consumed by some girls that they think only about their happiness and hope for a happy ending.
What to expect if you do decide to tie your fate to a man who is married:
- A mistress will never come first . Unfortunately, not everyone understands and accepts this truth. For a long time girls can keep hoping that the man will leave everything and leave the family. When this does not happen, begins fighting, scandals, claims. At such moments there is no desire to dress nicely, to put herself in order and to go out of the house in general. Such a scenario is quite common.
- If the lover’s wife found out about the cheating, there will be trouble . Some offended women cannot be stopped: insults, calls, threats, publication of information in social networks, damage to property. A woman in the name of her family and her children is ready for much. In such cases, a married lover is not that he does not want to communicate with the couple, he will do everything to never meet her again in life.
- Entering into a relationship with a man who has a family, pay attention to the presence of children . You can never build personal happiness by hurting others. Remember the rule of the boomerang. Moreover, if a man has children already in their teens, they will interfere and ruin life in all sorts of ways. Think about yourself and the prospect of such a relationship.
- When choosing the role of mistress, be prepared for judgment and resentment . Every person for whom family is an immutable value will not approve of your decision. Perhaps over time, those around you will accept this fact. If you have children, they, too, can suffer for your action: jokes from classmates, oblique glances from neighbors.
- If you still won and her lover abandoned the family, still be vigilant. There is a chance that after some time, the man realizes his mistake and expressed a desire to get back to his wife and children. The past is not so easy to forget. Slightly soften the circumstances by moving to another area or city. And, perhaps, already in a relationship with you, the partner will find a new mistress. After all, if a man has cheated once, he will easily repeat the second and third.
- Getting into a relationship with a mature man, make sure of his marital status. Not a very pleasant situation, when the girl in love up to her ears learns about the presence of a stamp in her passport. It’s good if she hasn’t had time to get pregnant yet. If your partner lied to you or, perhaps, continues to do so, leave his partner. And the faster, the better.
The correct return of a lover
Sometimes feelings are stronger than common sense, and the girl by all means wants to return the lover. If you dared to do such a thing, do it without harming yourself or others.
Sometimes a temporary breakup is good for you. Partners rethink relationships, behaviors, and actions. When emotions subside, a person reasons more logically. The man himself may realize that this is the girl he needs for a pleasant pastime, and even life together.
It is not for nothing that at school after each test the teacher conducted an analysis of the errors. This skill is useful and important in adulthood. Knowing your lover, adjust your behavior. This will probably solve all the problems.
- Step 3: Show your positive qualities.
If a man and a woman have been in a relationship for a long time, they get used to each other and are in no hurry to surprise each other. Show your partner your advantages. Conquer him, as at the first meeting. Make him fall in love like before.
If the young person avoids meetings, the likelihood of restoring the relationship is too small, but still possible. The main thing you can not do – to impose and annoying. If you know him well, you can visit the same places he goes with friends or at lunchtime, perhaps parties and events of mutual friends. But be very careful and cautious, because the man may be with his family.
Consider the period of separation as a time when there is an opportunity to do what you love, to learn something, to become better and more interesting. After all, today the lover has decided to break up, and tomorrow his feelings can flare up again. You should be in good shape and in a great mood, not crying into your pillow, counting the hours until his appearance.
- Step 6: Recall pleasant moments.
Joint photos, music, movies and memories can revive feelings. You can create a themed date or invite to a place where you met, kissed for the first time, spent a weekend together.
Psychologists say that girls are capable of believing things that are not really there. A man can woo, give gifts and call for a date, and a woman at this time has already mentally introduced him to his parents, organized the wedding and is on his way to the hospital. Always keep in mind that there is a passing infatuation, and, taking courting married men, and should always include your brain and think ten steps ahead. Very rarely do such relationships end positively.