Why does a man talk about another woman?
You have to write in such a way that you can’t help but be read. I think I have the magic of words.
The expert – Margarita Lopukhova
Family psychologist. For eight years I save the “family unit” from collapse. I help couples regain love and understanding.
The question “why is the man talking about the other woman,” they will find a thousand excuses. It can get to the point that men can quarrel with you just not to answer the question asked honestly. Sometimes even they can’t give themselves an accurate answer to the question asked. Such is the nature of men. It is easier for them to bypass difficult questions than to hurt you, but the question is that by silence and pathetic excuses they make women more hurt.
He doesn’t like you.
The answer to why a man talks about another is simple – he is not interested in you or has become uninterested in you. As painful and rude as it may sound, it’s a fact. But having a fact does not mean there is no way to deal with it.
If you are not dating and the man talks about the other woman in your presence, it is worth listening to the little things he emphasizes. Perhaps he shows no interest and talks about the other woman because of a problem with her at work?
It is possible that she has filled the space in the man’s mind and that is why he, trusting you, shares about his girlfriend. In this case, it is important not to show that you do not care about the other person and do not make yourself look bad jealous. Persistence and deliberate steps can get men interested and make him forget about the other.
If you are dating and noticed that your man talks about the other, that is the SOS signal. Do not roll up a scandal and scenes. These actions will only worsen the situation and make you look bad. Try to understand what is in the other girl that is not in you or why he talks about her. This way you can better understand the “enemy” and not let him get (maybe even unknowingly) your man.
But when you have done your best and you see that the situation is clearly not in your favor and the man keeps talking about her, then you have lost. A man would rather throw himself off a high rise than tell you that he has fallen out of love. Representatives of the male sex often shift solutions to difficult issues on the fragile shoulders of women.
The man thinks you are just a friend.
Perhaps the problem that a man talks about the other woman is hidden in you. Few women or girls know how to show their interest in his companion, and therefore they do not notice you as a woman, because you do not show it. The line is very thin, but breaking the wall between friend and lover is often harder than it seems. Being a friend or a brother is good, but don’t overplay your hand lest you fall into your own trap.
You are too indifferent to a man.
What can not be done to attract the attention of a loved one. Perhaps the man lacks your attention and affection, and he is looking for all of this in other women. Listen to him, do not ignore, if you do not want to lose your man.
A man can also talk about another woman if he wants to make you jealous. This option will seem to many a purely feminine trait, but believe me, men know how to surprise. And in this case you should deal with the reason for his actions, to understand what it prompted to cause you to be jealous. Perhaps it is also your indifference.
Men are more straightforward than girls. Some of them can not suspect that, talking about a colleague, classmate or friend will cause you resentment. They may just share with you about their everyday life or what impressed them.
If you don’t like hearing about other girls, tell your lover how you feel and explain everything. A loving person will always understand.
Do not confuse honesty with stupidity. An honest man trusts his woman and tells her about the people he is interested in. A foolish man will do the same without realizing what he is doing.
A final and possible reason why a man talks about another woman may be his posturing. He likes to make a show of himself, to feel powerful over women, to think that he is surrounded by them and to enjoy himself. The man may even be aware of the fact that he makes you angry and he enjoys it. Such a man may love his woman, but he will always and everywhere come first.
In other words, your man’s selfishness has no limit and he should get rid of it, so as not to continue to gratify his ego and more.
Conclusion: do not stop being feminine, listen to your men, be more decisive and remember that no one is worthy of your tears.
A man tells a woman about other women: why and how to react
Hello. Today we discuss on the blog bursin.ru , why a man tells a woman about other women. They share their past adventures, compare with exes, enthusiastically talk about those with whom they accidentally met, discuss colleagues at work … Why? Do not they understand that such conversations we do not have to heart, that we hurt their comparisons? They understand everything! Then what are they trying to achieve? There are several reasons, but not all of them are bad.
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I’ll start with the most innocuous reason: boundless trust. What does that mean? For example, my man talks to me daily about the women he happens to interact with during the day – coworkers, neighbors, salespeople, unexpected acquaintances he meets, and others. He just tells me everything that happened to him. Knowing that I might get jealous if I hear that he communicated with someone from his acquaintances, he prefers to let me know himself. He says, “I don’t want to hide anything from you. A colleague of his recently had a car break down. I don’t like her – she is young, windy, and unmarried, though she is the mother of two children. She is always looking for a benefactor and a good stepfather for her children. It’s a long commute to work, and we live in the same neighborhood. She asked my husband to drive her there and back for a few days while the car is being repaired. He could have told me nothing, I wouldn’t have known anyway. But he told me because he wants us to trust each other, and honesty is the key to boundless trust.
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By the way, I had to
Another reason why you shouldn’t be especially worried is that you “had to say something. If your man suddenly became frank during a conversation about a topic and told you about a similar incident that happened to another woman, this is not a reason to be alarmed. For example, you are planning a trip on vacation and he suddenly said that he went there with Anya and he did not like it there. Unpleasant to hear that, but not fatal. One-time incident – swallow and move the conversation. It happens regularly – talk to him about it, explain that you do not like his memories of exes and ask him not to talk like that. If he cares about you, he will understand and listen.
You can tell your friend anything.
Consider the following situation. You and the young man are not in a relationship, but you more than like him. You make plans for a future together and are waiting for him to figure out your feelings. But the guy thinks you’re just a good friend, talks about his past relationships and asks your opinion on the other girls he attracted. It’s time to sound the alarm. Urgently grab the bull by the horns and fall in love with him. There’s no point in waiting, or you’ll never get out of the friendship zone. If he considered you as his girlfriend, he certainly would not discuss with you.
I – a treasure.
Some guys periodically tell their ladies how much attention they get from the opposite sex, so that they do not forget what a treasure they possess. Yes, this kind of psychology of communication.
“Do you remember how nice and handsome I am? Don’t forget that, and let’s love me more,” is roughly what they want to convey. This can happen if:
- The guy is a narcissist. He likes it when all the attention is focused on him.
- You’ve been a bit cold lately, maybe you’ve had a fight, you’ve been working hard, you’re tired, or you’re not feeling well. It bothers him, he tries to cause jealousy to make sure you feel.
- The guy is not sure of the strength of your relationship and arranges “stupid tests.
Or he just wants to piss you off – pest.
Self-actualization of a weakling
This is also what wimps do, unsure of themselves as a man. That is why they show off and make up for it. At the same time they try to belittle the woman, to devalue her virtues. If he regularly praises himself, talking about how irresistible and in demand among women, but you speak only about your alleged deficiencies, then he is a weak man and not the best man. In this case, these types are often nothing – do not shine clever and live at someone else’s expense. In a conflict situation they hide behind the backs of others, pass up or run away. And then break away on those who are a priori weaker, including their women. My advice to you, stay away from them. A weak man will destroy you morally and will definitely never make you happy. Run away before the relationship has gone too far (marriage, children). Have they already gone too far? Look for ways and run while you’re still young and able to start your life over.
You don’t live up to your ideal.
If a man praises certain qualities of other women, but does not directly point out the shortcomings, perhaps he is waiting for you to guess and reach for the ideal yourself. This may apply to:
- Appearance: “Alyona bought a season ticket to the pool, started swimming and lost 10 pounds in two months.” “Marinka looks so good with a short haircut, she cut her hair to her toes and is happy.
- Jobs: “Katya says that staying at home is boring. She would never agree to be a housewife. “Vika quit her old job, studied online and now works in a big firm, earning twice the salary.
- Interests: “Masha reads the same book as me. It’s so interesting to discuss the plot.” “Olya got into table tennis, now she beats all our men in the department.”
Or something else. He’s not comparing you, but he’s letting you know it would be great if you changed the way he wants you to. How do you respond? Don’t try to please him and reach his ideal. He will always be something lacking in you – will be tortured to change. Be yourself. If he loves you, then you are who you are. But take a sensible look at the situation. Maybe you’re really stuck at home, turning into a clown and losing your zest for life? So it’s time to change, but in the way you want.
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This is the end.
If a man intentionally makes you angry, predicting a reaction and still talking about other women – this is the end. He has decided to break up with you. Directly say it – do not have the guts, so he takes to the scandal. He wants you to break up with him. What to do? Ask him straight out: “Why are you telling me this?” Not a coward – will tell the truth, otherwise he will find excuses or continue the offensive. The only way out is to break up. He has already decided everything, made a plan of retreat and puts it into action.
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She’s not in the past.
Sometimes men, when starting a new relationship, can’t let go of past relationships. He still has feelings for that lady, so on occasion he remembers her, not realizing that he is causing you pain. There are two possible outcomes:
- He needs time to forget.
- He goes back to her.
You can tell that this is the case if the conversation always involves the same girl, and he talks about her with tenderness or pain, sad or angry, in general, not indifferent. Do not cut corners, wait for a while. Do not notice any improvement, then talk to him frankly. Your relationship probably has no future.
The behavior of a male dog
If a man regularly and proudly talks about his love affairs and victories, then he is a typical male dog. For him, women are expendable, a means to obtain pleasure. He’s fine as he is, he’s not ready for a serious relationship. Don’t expect him to settle down when he meets you. This can happen to male dogs, but it’s an exception. Maybe he’ll be a model partner for a few years (or even less), and then he’ll snap and start cheating. Do you want him to? If he decided to start a new life with you, he’s not likely to brag about how macho he is.
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Revenge for the breakup
Finally, consider a situation where the ex-spouse after a divorce begins to tell you about his “sins” during the marriage, or how he was wildly “celebrating” the freedom, changing partners as a glove. The reason for this behavior is one – he is revenge on you for the fact that you left him or can not accept the fact that you are happy without him. He was probably waiting for you to suffer, to apologize, to try to come back. No, it’s not love, it’s trivial ego stroking. Otherwise he wouldn’t tell you that he slept with her and this and that. He’s not trying to make you jealous in order to test your feelings and gauge his chances of getting back. He just wants to hurt you so he can make life difficult for you. Nip those attempts in the bud. Keep communication to a minimum. And if they have to communicate, cut off such conversations at the beginning, making it clear that you do not want to hear anything about his adventures.
Girls, love your men, but themselves a little more. Be considerate and understanding, but do not let them humiliate you and play on your feelings. Love is only beautiful when it is mutual and paired with respect. That’s it for me. Goodbye.