How do you know if a man loves you? 23 signs
I’ve been in journalism for more than seven years now. Half of them as an editor. My weakness is doing mini investigations on new topics.
Expert – Margarita Lopukhova
Family psychologist. For eight years I have been saving “family units” from disintegration. I help couples regain love and understanding.
Why is he not taking any steps – because he lacks determination, or he just does not have feelings for you? How do you know if a man is in love with you? Is it worth taking everything into their own hands and make the first move? It’s time to find answers to these questions.
Symptoms of falling in love.
There is a high probability that he really is not indifferent to you if:
- He’s starting to behave differently.
Some guys, after realizing they are falling in love, start to pull away from the girl. Yes, this behavior may not be very logical, but what can you do – humans aren’t the most logical creatures on the planet.
He can be confused and even scared of his feelings, of his helplessness in front of them. Girls can be guilty of this too, can’t they?
If his behavior around you changed dramatically (and yet you did not have any conflicts), look closer to the guy – are you the cause of his discomfort?
- You’re his priority.
Is he willing to rearrange his schedule for you, compromise and do whatever it takes to make you happy? Does he appreciate your needs and desires and sincerely try to please you? This guy seems to really enjoy your company.
- He sets you apart from others
He cares about you more than anyone else. Strikes up a conversation just with you. Tries to impress you with jokes. Looks for eyes in the general company and sends you smiles… Sound familiar? That’s a good sign.
- He cares about your opinion.
If a guy asks for your opinion on issues that are important to him, it can also indicate that he feels sympathy for you.
- He remembers little things about you
He remembers what kind of coffee you prefer and what movie you wanted to go to the movies. He remembers the title of the book you recommended him to read and invites you to the restaurant that makes your favorite pasta. Why does he pay such close attention to these little things? Because they relate to you.
- He shortens the distance between you.
Leans in and moves closer during conversations. Cuddles you when meeting you and holds you so (of course, just for that reason!) You do not stumble. He looks for you in the crowd at a party and immediately rushes to you. Because he wants to be as close to you as possible.
- He protects you
When he’s near you, he immediately turns into a brave knight, ready to protect his princess from the dragon. And it’s not just physical danger. He protects you from all negative influences and does everything to see you smile more often. And for the sake of it he is ready to move mountains.
- He compliments you
On your appearance, your intelligence, your sense of humor and other virtues. Openly express their sympathy in words, he is not ready, so acts “workarounds.
- He wants to please you.
And takes active steps to do so. Trying to cheer you up when you’re sad, gives gifts, invites you for a walk, sends sweet messages, etc. Because he sincerely wants to please you.
“He talks about you all the time!” – Did you hear that phrase from his friends? That’s a great sign! Especially if the guy himself is not very fond of showing his feelings. You’ve really got him hooked!
- He’s always ready to help
Lying at home with a fever, and you’re out of medicine? Or did you have an urgent craving for a popsicle? If he is ready to rush at your first call to solve your problems and problems, then, to this guy definitely worth looking.
- He worries when you fight.
He doesn’t want there to be any conflicts or misunderstandings between you. And genuinely cares when he realizes he’s upset and disappointed you. Because he values your feelings and your attitude towards him.
- He’s jealous of you.
Laughingly telling him about another guy’s advances and he starts to boil over? Throws unfriendly glances at any of your suitors? Sounds like this guy is jealous. And doesn’t want you to get someone else (although excessive and unhealthy jealousy is no longer OK, but that’s not what we’re talking about now).
- He’s interested in your plans for the future.
It’s important to him that you can confide in him and talk about your innermost dreams. He may also want to be a part of your future.
- He supports you
In all or almost all of your endeavors. He calms you down when you fail and emphasizes your strengths in every way. At times he seems to see more good in you than you do, which is how falling in love works.
- When he’s talking to you, he puts his phone away.
He’s looking at you, not at his gadget screen. Because, first, he wants to show his interest and get your affection. And secondly, he does not miss the opportunity to admire you.
- He asks you to write when you get home.
If possible, he will accompany you home himself – it’s another chance to spend time alone with you. If he can’t, he’ll ask you to text or call him to let him know you got home safely. And he really cares – if you forget to text him, he’ll get in touch.
- He invites you into his company
Is your boyfriend always asking you to join his group of friends? That’s great! It means he wants to spend more time with you and gradually make you a part of his life.
In addition, you’ll be able to conduct an investigation. First, you can find out what his environment is like – you can tell a lot about a person from it. And secondly, from the reactions of his friends to you you will be able to understand how often this guy discusses you with them.
- He smiles more when he’s with you.
You always manage to cheer him up, and he doesn’t even try to hide it. His face immediately blurs into a smile – the guy is happy for another opportunity to spend time with a girl he likes.
- He tries to surprise you.
Carefully chooses the place for your meeting. Or his hands prepare dinner. Or arranges your surprises. Or suddenly gives you the gift you’ve been dreaming about. In other words, he’s doing everything he can to make you feel good – just as good as you make him feel.
- He shares his thoughts and feelings with you
Physical intimacy is beautiful, but only with the people closest to our hearts do we dare to be emotionally intimate. Is he willing to share his worries with you and allow himself to be vulnerable? This is a clear sign that he trusts you and sets you apart from everyone he knows.
- He’s trying to share your interests with you.
Your favorite show isn’t his style at all, but he’s willing to watch it with you. Why? Because he wants to get closer to you and have another topic of conversation with you.
- He’ll admit that he’s thinking about you.
He can say it outright or hint at it in every possible way. Because he really has you in his head. And he likes it.
Is it worth making the first move?
If you really like the guy and want you to be together, why not? Especially if you see that he’s also showing you signs of attention and is clearly interested in you. After all, life is too short.
If a guy is by nature insecure and indecisive, you may never wait for him to make the first move. And then, when you’re about sixty years old, you’ll meet by chance in a store and realize that you foolishly missed out on your happiness and a lot of time for nothing. It’s a frightening prospect, isn’t it?
Before you decide to take that first step, however, think about this:
- You could be wrong.
For some people, flirting is just a form of communication. They can flirt with literally every other person without having strong feelings for anyone. Are you sure your acquaintance isn’t in that category?
Is he always willing to be supportive and come to your rescue? It is quite possible that he is just a very friendly and helpful person. Not just with you, but with everyone in general.
What to do: pay attention to how he communicates with other people. Is he really giving you special attention?
- Your confession could make life difficult for both of you.
Are you in the same company, study or work together? If so, think about whether it’s worth the risk. If he turns you down, you may experience tension that makes you and the people around you uncomfortable. The same thing – if he reciprocates you, you will start an affair, but eventually parted on a not very good note.
What to do: think about whether this man is worth the risk.
- Maybe he doesn’t need any of this.
Is he even ready for a relationship? Does he need this kind of commitment? What if his hesitation isn’t just because he’s afraid of getting rejected by you? What if he’s okay with the easy, playful format of your relationship without any obligations or official statuses?
How have his relationships with ex-girlfriends worked out? Does he know how to take responsibility in different areas of life? Or will he hide in the bushes as soon as you make the first move? You need to find answers to these questions.
What to do: Respond to his flirting. Invite him to a non-committal friendly meeting. His reaction to your actions will already be able to judge whether this guy is worth your efforts or not.
The verdict: If you’re used to taking everything from life, do not like to waste time and are not afraid of possible rejection, then you should definitely take the first step. It’s still better than being in limbo for weeks/months/years and subconsciously shutting yourself off from relationships with other people.
How do you take the first step?
You can ask a guy out, hint at the fact that you like him in every way (looks, gestures, flirting) or declare your feelings outright. And if you lack determination, read these stories of real girls who took matters into their own hands:
- “I took his phone, entered my number and signed my contact as ‘best girl ever.’ Huh, that was so unlike me! But it ended up working out just fine and spilled over into a relationship that lasted five years,” K, 23.
- “He called me into his workplace. Sitting around, sorting things out. I don’t know what came over me, but I just stood up and walked right up to him. “Well, I certainly can’t concentrate that way,” he said. “Then take a break,” I replied and kissed him,” M, 24.
- “Oh, I always take the first step. I tell you from experience, guys love it when at a party you just walk up to them and take them dancing with you. Also, ladies, it saves you from having to refuse to dance to suitors you’re unsympathetic to,” R, 19.
- “I sent him a link to the Myers-Briggs psychological test. He sent me his result, and we started chatting about it. We have now been in a relationship for over eight months,” K, 24.
- “I’ll just give you some advice: make sure he’s not dating anyone beforehand and don’t confess your feelings on a drunken head. Also, don’t rush things and don’t demand that a guy immediately declare his love for you back,” N, 30.
“How do you know if a man is in love?”
What signs clearly indicate that a man is attracted to you? Reddit girls share their thoughts:
15 things a man only does if he truly loves you
If your man does these 15 things, you shouldn’t worry. He truly loves you.
Sometimes it’s hard to know how a man really feels because you never know what’s going on inside his head.
But love is not just a feeling, but actions that always tell the truth.
Men always show their feelings through their actions and the actions they do (or don’t do) toward you.
Does the man feel a simple sympathy, attraction or do he have real feelings?
There are certain things your man will be willing to do when he loves you.
The psychology of a man who loves you.
He listens to you intently.
Often we exchange words during a conversation, only waiting for our turn to speak. But with the arrival of a special man, everything changes.
The person who really loves you will not pretend to listen, but will actually listen to you . He will pay attention to the words you say and try to understand you. Moreover, he respects everything you say and remembers all the details.
If he really likes you, you will get his undivided attention because he is truly interested in knowing everything about you.
2. Never forces you to do anything you don’t like.
He will respect your decisions and won’t force you to do something you don’t want to do if you’re not ready for it.
If a man knows it will hurt you, he is unlikely to ever ask you to do it, simply because he respects you and doesn’t want it to upset you.
3. is interested in you.
He will care about your feelings and your opinion, how you look at the world, and what you think about this or that.
He will ask you about your dreams, your goals, what makes you do things a certain way. He will try to find out everything about you.
4. Gives you some freedom.
One of the worst situations in a relationship occurs when one partner tries to take over the other’s personal space.
We usually don’t like those who smother us with attention and keep us from developing as individuals. A person who truly loves you and cares about you will never invade your personal space.
5. Cares about you.
We tend to care about those we love. There are many ways to show you care.
Sometimes you just need to support your significant other when they want to share their thoughts and feelings, or care for them when they are sick.
6. Telling your friends and family about you
Men aren’t as strong in expressing feelings, and if he feels comfortable enough to tell his friends and family about you, and they in turn mention that they know you, you can be sure that he genuinely loves you.
How a man who loves you behaves
7. Gives you honest advice and asks for the same
© Getty Images Pro
A man will be proud of you and will never try to push you away. He will appreciate your work, but at the same time, if need be, he will give you honest advice instead of veiling it or saying something useless.
8. Will think about how to spend his time, not how he spends his money
A man who loves will always find ways to spend time with you without fears or excuses.
He will enjoy spending time with you. It will be more important for him to spend time with you than to think about how much money he will spend on it.
9. Jealous of your male friends
He will feel jealous jabs when you go out with your male friends, but at the same time he won’t forbid you to do so.
He is more likely to try to talk about his feelings and jealousy instead of distancing himself and avoiding the situation.
10. Doesn’t consider sex to be real intimacy.
For him, real intimacy will not consist of sleeping with you, but of kissing you on the forehead when you are not in the mood.
He will seek emotional intimacy, and you will feel as if you are looking into each other’s souls, knowing each other’s dreams, hopes, and fears, and understanding your partner on a deeper level.
11. Showing your vulnerable side.
Men in general very rarely show their vulnerability. They don’t want to appear emotional, and to them vulnerability is a sign of weakness.
Therefore, if a man talks frankly with you about his vulnerability, shares secrets with you, talks about his worries and fears, it means that he truly loves you.
12. Arguing with you for the sake of your relationship
Arguments and disagreements are normal in all relationships. They show our partner what is important to us. However, you can tell if a man loves you by the way he argues with you.
If he tries to solve a problem between you, is willing to compromise, invests time and energy to explain his point of view, you can be sure that he loves you.
13. Will never try to break up a relationship, even if you have problems
No matter how difficult the situation is, a man who loves you will never decide to break up. He will always try to solve the problem instead of pouncing with accusations.
He will always look for ways to make things right.
14. Discusses plans for the future with you and supports you in your aspirations
Trust is something without which it is difficult to build a relationship. A man who cares about you will ask your opinion when he needs to make important decisions in life, because he trusts you and he cares to know what you think.
In turn, he, too, will encourage you and help you achieve your goals.
15. Thinks you are the most beautiful woman inside and out
A man who loves you will not focus his attention on pimples, a cold on the lips or other small flaws.
He will not care if you have gained or lost a few extra pounds. You will be the most beautiful woman to him because he loves you as a whole with all your virtues and flaws.