How to set up a colleague at work?

10 Ways to Drive an Employee to Dismissal at Will

There are not only “beloved” employees, but also those whom you want to get rid of as soon as possible. And not necessarily because this person is bad at work. They are just annoying… With a long face or extravagant manners, with excessive relaxation or a formal attitude to work. Clearly not in the spirit of the organization. Only how to fire without violating the labor laws or the contract? There is only one way – to force to leave by “voluntary resignation”. And to make it so that this desire of the employee became very hot, and the decision about dismissal that followed – firm and irrevocable…

1. Continuously on any occasion and in various forms inform the employee that he does not work well.

Criticize all of his reports, wrap and ridicule any initiatives. Don’t pass up an opportunity to “speak highly” of his professional qualities in front of colleagues or customers. Periodically ask the employee the question, “What do you even do here, huh?” Continuously make it clear that he took the wrong job. And in general, to do a skilled job he is not given … The result will not be long to wait. Few people can live and work with the constant feeling that you are bad and only interfere…

2. Hold the employee responsible for expensive objects, with which he does not work and which he is not able to keep safe.

Most people like the devil from the responsibility for material responsibility in principle. And all the more so if you have to be responsible for something you can’t even keep an eye on. For example, tell the system administrator that he will now be responsible for the safety of all computer equipment of the company, including the server and several workstations in a remote branch. Or “please” the advertising specialist with responsibility for the presentation equipment with which managers travel to exhibitions. And, make such a message should be immediately with an inventory and the act of acceptance in his hands. Followed by the nervous exclamation of “I will not sign it, I’d rather quit!” should not be left unattended…

3. Create a sense of chaos for the employee. Make him stop understanding at all what his duties are and what he has to do every day at work.

The essence of this method is expressed by a well-known phrase: “Go there – I do not know where, bring it – I do not know what. In practice, this is implemented by issuing new daily tasks (with cancellation the next day), vague instructions. Ordering an employee to put aside all current tasks and take on a new project, then immediately drop that project and take on another. The purpose of all these actions is to destroy the employee’s understanding of his or her daily responsibilities and to completely disorient his or her activities. As a result, when he comes to work each day, he will no longer understand what he is doing and what he is doing at any given moment. It can not go on like this for a long time – nerves can not stand…

4. Let the person know that the organization has long since stopped needing him or her, or the position he or she holds. And keep him in “honorary retirement” simply out of a sense of responsibility and pity.

That is usually the way to get rid of old and faithful employees who were at the root of the company, served faithfully, but were unable to grow professionally with the firm and no longer fit the new level of business. To fire this person with their own hands – the conscience does not allow. Usually such an employee is under the illusion that everything is still hanging on to him and the company still needs him. However, if illusions are dispelled and it is made clear that today’s “work” is just charity from the boss’s side, the normal (proud) person is elementary offended. And will try as soon as possible, at least for self-assertion, to leave for another job.

5. Inform the employee that his activities will soon be checked by a special commission created by the employer.

Such a statement should cause the employee to be visibly confused: “Why a commission? The management already has a complete picture of my work… The only reasonable explanation is that they are digging around under me, looking for an official reason to fire me. And, probably, under the article on professional inaptitude or the like. So why call a commission? If you want to fire me, then I will quit myself!

6. Make changes to the employee’s job duties in such a way as to actually lower his position and the level of work he is doing.

Technically leave the employee at his current position and status. In fact, seriously demote him. For example, take away his subordinates and assign him some stupid, but very “important” work. Fill the “combat officer” (sales manager) with clerical work or send a high-end programmer to the accounting department to make “programs” calculations in Excel. Hardly anyone will want to do inadequate work and degrade professionally for long.

7. Make the rest of the staff actually boycott the employee, literally stopping all communication and interaction with him.

For example, sympathetically and in deep secrecy tell each individual employee of the company that their comrade is suffering from a rare and incurable disease, the mechanism of infection of which the medicine still does not know exactly… the method works without fail. The very next day the employee will discover to his astonishment that he is not receiving a handshake (the reason is clear), he is shunned, and generally looked upon as an enemy of the people. And even if we discard the emotional component, it is still unreal to perform work without interaction with other staff … I wonder how long he will hold out?

8. Appoint an employee as the CEO of a legal entity, effectively leaving him in his previous position and with his previous responsibilities.

In fact, this is about the same as hanging material responsibility (see method 2). In this case, however, any kind of liability could result, up to and including criminal. To sign blindly for someone else’s decisions, possible “cash-out”, to guess if the taxes have been paid… Well, no way, look for the “Pound” elsewhere. Better a layoff than such a “career jump”…

9. Organize a “set-up” for the employee, as a result of which he will be happy to just quit.

For example, arrange for the freight forwarder to “lose” a large amount of goods, or the secretary to lose important documents, or the cashier to lose cash. (You can bring in specialists from the security service to solve the problem.) As a result, the terrified employee will consider it best to close the matter with a simple resignation of his own accord. As a second option, you can organize a sexual harassment scandal in the office (for the man). Arrange an investigation of the smallest details, organize a meeting, demand an explanation and repentance. In theory, a normal man will tell everyone to go to hell and quit.

10. Look for the slightest reason and announce to the employee official reprimands, warnings, etc. Eventually, in the face of being fired “under the article”, the man will leave on his own.

Wait for him in the morning with a stopwatch (and witnesses) at the office doorstep and if he is late, immediately draw up a report. Announce him an official reprimand for any reason and immediately issue an order. All your actions should make it clear to the employee that the administration is looking for a reason to fire him, and on the “bad” article. (Accordingly, gather the necessary documents.) So why wait?

How to spite a colleague at work: “harmful” tips

How to spite a colleague at work: harmless ways and more drastic measures. “Harmful” tips how to ruin the life of the whole office. A selection of videos.

We always have to be and work in a team, and very often not every person from this group is to our liking, and sometimes with colleagues at work a person gets into a real war. If you suddenly find yourself in a situation where you have to compete with another employee of the company, our article will come just in time, because with its help you will learn how to make mischief to a colleague at work.

Harmless ways

If you do not want to spoil your karma and strongly disadvantage the person with whom you work, we suggest you harmless ways to spite your colleagues at work.

  • The easiest way is to ignore your rival, believe me, when a person notices that his tricks do not respond it hurts even more. Indifference is the best weapon.
  • If you are an intemperate person, try to mirror your opponent’s actions, this will annoy him even more. The truth is, this will further inflame your conflict.
  • You can use such harmless tricks that are more like friendly pranks, such as mayonnaise on a bun instead of cream, or paint soap with colorless nail polish, then it will not soap. These shenanigans are great for you if you and your coworker are kind of friends, but still competitive with each other.

More cardinal methods.

  • If one particular person hinders the life of the entire team, you can unite and arrange him on strike, stop communicating with him, do not respond to requests, simply ignore him, if the enemy will not try to correct himself, he simply can not work in a team and will leave his workplace very soon, or simply will stop bothering you.
  • You can translate your colleague’s work document into some exotic language (Hindi, for example), of course, preferably retaining the original, but if you are dead set on leaving it as it is, let him redo it. You can translate simply by copying the text into a translator.
  • With a syringe you can fill the working mouse of the enemy, and then his hands will be oily, he will wash them every time, and they will get dirty again and again.
  • Another “trick” with the mouse is the food film. Put it under the mouse, and it will not react, you need to do it as inconspicuously as possible, so that the colleague does not immediately guess.
  • You can make a screenshot of your work screen and, when your colleague leaves for a couple of minutes, open that picture, but make it so that it is all over the screen and there aren’t any icons. In order to remove suspicion from yourself you can even offer your help and pretend that you want to fix something, the main thing at this moment is to hold back laughter.
  • If your colleague came in black pants (the girl, respectively, in a skirt) draw a target on his workplace with chalk, if you instigate all your colleagues, you can enjoy a funny spectacle all day, and “send” the colleague home in this form. This method is best suited for those who have light chairs in the office.
  • Of course, you can always set up the hated colleague in front of the bosses, ruin his report and then he will not only be forced to redo all the work all over again, but also lose his bonus.

How to ruin life in the office for everyone?

If you are just a very bad person and want to spoil the life of the office for all employees, or you are a black sheep that everyone is picking on, here are a few “harmful” tips.

  • Constantly tell your colleagues something, how you took your cat to the vet, how masha broke her leg, and many other similar stories, your colleagues will be furious with your constant stories, be sure.
  • Your phone is ringing, you should not leave your office, speak as loudly as possible, let everyone hear that your girlfriend dumped the guy, you can walk between the tables to approach everyone.
  • Use a perfume with a very strong scent, it is even better to spray in the office and go about your business.
  • Turn on your inner perfectionist. Rearrange all the cups and rearrange the pens. There should be perfect order everywhere, tell everyone what to do and how to do it.
  • Buy fast food and other food with a pungent smell. Let everyone feel the aroma, you can also snack on chips and crisps, so that in addition to the smells employees “enjoy” the sound.
  • Complain more, you must be dissatisfied with everything: too hot, too blowing, you did not get enough sleep, you want to eat. Other people’s whining is very tiresome.

All these actions should be done defiantly, so that the colleagues saw that you are not just such a slovenly person, but just want to annoy everyone. Just do not overdo it, as all these actions will not find a response from the boss and may even provoke the boss to fire him. Your goal is to hurt the disliked employee, not to lose your job, although this is also a way to get rid of a hated colleague.

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