How to make up with the guy if we broke up?
How to make up with the guy if we broke up?
“How do I make up with a guy after a breakup if it’s my fault?” – this question, apparently, tortures you not the first day. And most likely you are seriously offended him, since he decided to break up with you. Your situation is fixable. Even if you think it’s over, it’s not. Resentment, anger, pain, neurosis are just human emotions. Emotions are a fickle thing. Today they are there, tomorrow they are gone. Today he is offended, and tomorrow the resentment and anger can be replaced by a desire to see, a longing for a loved one, and even a decision to forgive his girlfriend for the “joint.” In our article, we’ll tell you how to behave so that your loved one not only forgave you, but he returned to you. To do this, we recommend to take advantage of useful and relevant advice from psychologists, who are not the first year in their practice of teaching people to find common ground with each other, to establish relationships and restore communication. These tips are feasible, they are not difficult, and most importantly, they give 100% – the effect. Act for sure, and you’re sure, following the advice of experts, you will be able to regain the trust and love of your boyfriend.
So what is recommended to do to get him to forgive and get in touch? Right now you are a source of irritation for him. The person who has hurt him and for whom he is experiencing negative emotions willy-nilly. Change the situation. Stop irritating him.
How do you do that? Apologize. Just apologize for your “shame” and openly tell the man that you did not hurt him intentionally. Your task – to explain to the man that no one is sinless people in the world, each of us make mistakes, including yourself. We do not do it on purpose, not to hurt the people closest to us, but because it happened. Be honest and straightforward with him. If the man does not want to talk to you, write him a message or letter, most importantly, tell him the essence of your words. If he reads your thoughts, he will cool down a little and “take down the defense” so to speak. Afterward, give your loved one time to cool down a bit. Negative emotions, pain and resentment in his soul should subside a bit. This is only possible over time, plus, your confession and apology will serve as a catalyst for him to eventually stop being angry at you and start communicating with you.
Don’t push him, don’t get hysterical, and don’t beg him for forgiveness. This behavior puts you in the position of “humiliated woman” and gives him the opportunity to control you, to dictate his terms. If you apologize to a man, do it only once, maximum two times. Your man is a smart man. He will understand that you are sorry. If it is about your infidelity, and loved one left you because – of another man, you can use a little tricky techniques in psychology, which take into account the peculiarities of male thinking. In particular, as you yourself know, a man is all about his ego. Another man, a rival, and your favoring this other man is a very big blow to your boyfriend’s ego. His self-esteem is now severely damaged, so when you apologize, you can mention that the connection with the other was stupid and unintentional, almost fleeting to you, and also directly say that no man on the planet Earth is no comparison to your beloved.
What does it take to make him want to come back to you? If we are talking about a big fight, time and distance is the best medicine for your relationship. Your man has to get over the hurt himself, and you should not “flash” in his face. Give him the opportunity to be alone and make a decision for himself. Reassure yourself that everything you could, you’ve already done.
Now it’s time to gently “push” him to make a decision in your favor.
How you can do this:
Before you continue reading, we suggest watching the following video:
1 Start living your life. The less you “jerk” him around, beg and seek him out, the sooner he will want to get in touch with you. Of course it’s hard, and you may feel guilty about what you did, but then again, you did everything you could. The rest is up to your man: to forgive you or not.
2 Change your appearance and your inner attitude. Become attractive to your ex-boyfriend so that he would want to come back to you, even in spite of your big quarrel. You need to take the advice of marketers and make yourself a bright, popular lady who attracts the eyes of other men and lives in harmony with himself and with his life. Then the ex will start looking in your direction again and want to be part of your happy life.
We have already written about how to change yourself externally and internally in other articles on this site. Come in, study the useful information and put it into practice. It will help you completely change and transform yourself.
3 Tell him directly that you’re ready to restart your relationship, but you won’t put pressure on him, much less persuade him. He’s free to decide for himself, and you’ll respect his choice. So, if we once again, again, go through the article and briefly answer your question: “How to reconcile with the guy after breaking up, if I am to blame?”, the strategy of your behavior with your ex is as follows:
How to make up with your boyfriend.
A fight is a very unpleasant thing. But what to do if the guy does not take steps towards the girl because of his ego? Psychologists agree that in the case that the girl admits her wrongdoing, the guy can quickly thaw out.
Remember, after a quarrel, it is important not to allow self-injury, which slowly destroys feelings and calls to end the relationship. Do not rush to conclusions, it is better to take the initiative in your own hands.
What to say to a guy to make up? The answer to this question is sought by many girls, who, in one way or another, are guilty in front of a man. Especially important is to show sincerity, which is sure to bribe the partner. If the guy does not go to the contact, think of what a pleasant surprise to present and how to apologize.
Use words or phrases – “honey, I love you so much,” “let’s forget all our insults and disagreements. Do not continue to clarify the relationship, even if the guy is determined to continue to argue and use humiliation techniques. Even if you have acted low, you should draw conclusions! But a real man would not dare stoop to scolding in the direction of a woman.
If you, for whatever reason, do not have the courage – you can make up with the guy by SMS. To do this you do not need to write a long text of apology, it is enough to admit his wrongdoing, and to write affectionate and warm words.
Many psychologists and experts recommend that before making up with an ex-boyfriend, give an outlet to emotions and work out special techniques. This may not necessarily be shouting insults in the woods, it is quite possible to just cry in silence. If you are an expressive person – lay out your grievances on a piece of paper, getting rid of negative thoughts, fears, fears. After that, simply throw the sheet in a trash can or burn it.
After the emotions have subsided and the anger has stopped boiling over, it is necessary to think well about the situation. Better yet, understand why it happened between you. Perhaps you committed a misdemeanor and not the joking action you think you did? Maybe you have a temper and do not know how to take constructive criticism? Only after analyzing the behavior should you talk to your lover and discuss further plan of action.
How to make up with the guy from a distance
Long-distance relationship is a fragile thing. Communication is heated, due to the fact that the halves are far from each other, which exacerbates the quarrel, and can develop the conflict even more. In both the first and second cases, it is necessary to understand the cause of the crack in the love relationship:
Lack of trust on the part of the partner
This is a serious reason, which statistically can even lead to a breakup. A big quarrel can flare up because of trivial jealousy and deceit, which, in one way or another, are present in a serious relationship. It is worth talking to your partner and let him know that love is the most important thing and you need to learn to trust each other. This will bear fruit, which will strengthen the union. According to most experts, spicing things up in the relationship won’t hurt either. It warms up the feelings and helps to strengthen the relationship. But remember the measure!
Conflict because one of the partners is proud.
Whether you like it or not, but remake your partner is impossible, this is an adult formed person with his life principles and experiences that he consciously carries through life. But the power of conversation should not be underestimated. Once the man hears the requests and sincere remorse, the conflict will be over.
Another major reason why most long-distance couples fight. In order to avoid a similar fate, it is necessary to regularly call at least by video call, in case there is no possibility to see each other in person.
Important! Psychologists advise to invent certain rituals and traditions that have an extraordinary power to bring each other closer. This will make you feel better, and strengthen the alliance between two loving people. As such rituals can serve as an obligatory wishing each other a good night or a good morning, joint tea party to discuss plans for the future. According to statistics, those couples who often discuss their immediate and long-term plans, have stronger relationships, compared to those who consider it a waste of time.
Unfortunately, only a psychologist can eliminate them. Talking to your partner in this case will also not be superfluous.
The life experience of the closest relatives
As a rule, when relating at a distance, partners pay attention to the example of the relationship of relatives, acquaintances, parents. If in a particular situation in the family or acquaintances, someone can “mess up” and change, it is possible that thoughts of repeating this scenario are allowed.
Once you have established the cause of the quarrel in a long-distance relationship, it should be eliminated immediately. The most winning option will be a visit or a surprise with a sincere apology for their behavior.
However, you should not be in a hurry to make a connection. It is necessary to carefully weigh up whether you need such a relationship in which mistrust and difficulty caused by the jealousy of your partner slips through.
What to write to the guy to make up
Many experts in this matter emphasize that it is wrong and unacceptable to reconcile and argue through text messages. But if there is no other option, you should work with what you have. What text to write if he does not want to talk?
Verse . It is best to come up with some kind of verse of your own composition. But if nothing comes to mind, you can use the Internet and remake it for your relationship.
Picture with an apology . Find a suitable image and send it to your boyfriend with sincere words of remorse. This will help melt his heart and remember that there is an indivisible connection between you, which still should only bring positive emotions to each other, and not offend anyone.
A declaration of love . It’s as winning as ever. If you write words of love and add a picture to the subject, surely the man’s heart will melt and he will be able to communicate as before.
Shared picture in a text message . This is another little trick on how to dispel a guy’s pride and give him the necessary dose of memories. It is advisable to insert a photo in which you are both happy – it can be your vacation or some important date.
In case the quarrel dragged on, you can formalize the apology in the form of such a message:
“Vitya, forgive me for this stupid and unpleasant situation. I was very hurt when I heard your words…because of that I said a lot of nasty things. Let’s remember how many good things there were between us. How we met and spent time together. I really miss your warmth and affection. You are the best man for me. Let’s make a conclusion and continue our relationship?”
You don’t want to be corny and send off a picture of a disgruntled animal crying. The guy will start to get angry or mock you, the situation will get worse. Also, psychologists do not recommend to clarify relationships over the phone. Out of 100 cases, 90 did not lead to a positive conclusion. Reconcile with a guy by correspondence is possible, but still, you should give preference to a meeting where physical contact is possible – hugs and kisses, as well as the opportunity to look into each other’s eyes.
How to make up with the guy, if he is guilty
Of course, if the guy is to blame for the quarrel, it is logical to expect his apology and admission of guilt. But, if the other half does not seek to improve the relationship, it is worth thinking about resolving the conflict first. There are several ways in which the guy will not even realize that you made the first move. A competent reconciliation scheme will eliminate the possibility of humiliation and imposition.
Showing your feelings of admiration for the man
Even if you are in a fight, most likely the guy is waiting for a word of approval and praise, which he needs right now like air. In order that it does not look like flattery, it is recommended to say gratitude from the heart, bringing out his best qualities. For example, “Sasha, you are so attentive! You took out the trash and took care of the cleanliness of our house.”
Manifestation of strengths
The girl needs to simulate the situation in the quarrel, when the man can show his masculine strengths. This will serve as the first step to reconciliation and allow you to reach a new level of the relationship.
Sense of gratitude
The ideal option would be to make a collage with your own hands with your photos. This will evoke certain feelings and the man will be moved.
If experimenting with these methods does not work, it is necessary to take the other half out for a sincere and heartfelt conversation, to note, his part of the guilt in the quarrel. However, you should not overdo it and be intrusive – you can achieve the opposite effect (the guy will hate you).
- In order to understand how to act correctly if he is wrong, it is necessary to refer to the sign of the zodiac ring:
- Aries is the most vulnerable and cunning sign, which claims excessive attention. In order to make up with this representative, you need to say compliments and ignore barbs to your address.
- Taurus does not tolerate a bad attitude, and cares about the stability of the mental state. In order to make the right first step, you need to give him the freedom of choice and give him time for a break. Perhaps after that he will initiate a reconciliation.
- Gemini is a contradictory sign that loves everything about it. When taking the initiative, it is necessary to build up the connection competently, guided by memories and common sense.
- Cancer – a touchy sign, which is not a bread, give to offend. As forgiveness can serve a delicious dinner and beautiful lingerie on his woman.
- Leo is a selfish sign. Astrologers recommend to use compliments.
- Virgo is characterized by cold reasoning. As an apology, kisses and hugs will do.
- Libra – according to experts, the quick-retreating representative of the zodiacal ring. It is recommended to just say the words of apology.
- Scorpio – it is important to be able to listen to him and make correct and effective conclusions.
- Sagittarius – an affectionate text or a general photo and Sagittarius forgiveness is in your pocket.
- Capricorn is a stubborn one at that. In order to earn forgiveness should try. They love sincerity and praise.
Aquarius – an unusual gift or surprise and Aquarius at your feet.
What to do if I’m guilty.
When a girl is at fault, a guy expects an apology from her side. In order to exhaust the conflict it is necessary to arrange a romantic meeting. During a delicious dinner, admit your own mistakes and unobtrusively make your point. Some girls make a number of mistakes when the blame for the quarrel lies with them.
Experts in the field of psychology recommend to be proactive. If indeed the blame is on you, you need to admit it. Call, meet, let them know that your man is very important, as is the relationship with him. Do not focus on the little things and teasing – this will only drive your partner into depression. Offend the guy can even caustic remarks.
Be sure to pay attention not only to external signs in the behavior of the guy, but also to his inner state.
How to make up with your boyfriend after the breakup
Before you make up with your ex-boyfriend, you need to decide whether to enter the same river twice. If the answer is yes, you should talk to your partner frankly – does it make sense to rebuild a relationship and a family? This is a very important issue that can only be discussed together. It is important not to make mistakes and not to cheat in the future. Get over the experience together and start fresh!