How to fall in love with her husband again – psychologist’s tips: why cool feelings, how to restore passion
It often happens in family relationships that feelings cool down, and life turns into a routine. Perhaps the love has not dried up, but affected the very routine life, the lack of romance and initiative from partners. Many women are looking for information on how to fall in love with her husband again – psychologist’s tips in this will help, you should only listen to the recommendations.
How to make your husband fall in love with you again – psychologist’s tips
Every second couple is faced with such a phenomenon as the cooling of feelings. This period is characterized by increased irritability, fatigue from each other, the need for privacy.
Routine affects the relationship, and gradually the passion and former feelings leave even the strongest couple.
Women are more sensitive in terms of emotional and spiritual realms, because they are often the ones who sound the alarm as soon as they feel signs of cooling.
What attracts men to women?
A woman can and should fall in love with her husband again. This will help tips psychologist.
Why feelings cool down.
Keep warm family feelings can be, but this requires work and desire of both partners. Match these conditions are sometimes very difficult, and a woman often have this burden to bear. Because of the single effort, it often feels like everything is going wrong.
Watch this video. Where have the feelings gone? What’s killing the love in a relationship?
The reasons for the onset of a family crisis can be the following factors:
- The woman herself provokes the situation when she stops trivializing her care. Sometimes there is a feeling that for many girls the maximum program in life is to get married. After that come bathrobes, slippers and the perpetually tired, dissatisfied look. No wonder husbands begin to grow cold to their wives,
- Wanting to get married as soon as possible, many young people have no idea about the intricacies of family life. Rare woman does not want to get married because of moral unpreparedness, following social dogmas. An untidy apartment and crumpled underwear, the absence of a normal dinner is unlikely to make a man go home with a desire. Rather, he prefers to stay at work,
- Intimate problems can create additional discomfort. In this case, intimacy is an area that not every man would dare to talk about heart-to-heart. Most likely, he will look for variety on the side, but without the desire to leave the family, but just for the sake of curiosity. To avoid this happening, a woman sometimes you need to show initiative and diversity, so that marital debt has not become an everyday occurrence,
- The birth of a child, sad as it may be, can also provoke a crack in the relationship. In particular, in the intimate sphere. After another sleepless night, few have the strength to spend the night with his spouse. The woman is often too busy with the baby, and her husband just may not have enough time,
- Sometimes the cause of family conflicts can be an unfavorable work environment. Failures, rushes, or financial difficulties can seriously undermine the psyche. So it is worth just to be patient. By the way, the influence of career on the family is more common for men, because they perceive financial instability sharper.
80% of success – a competent tactic of behavior
If in a particular case there are several reasons, then after analyzing you need to identify the main one, and against it to solve the rest. Some grasp at all the nuances, solve all problems, but this irrational approach will take even more effort and will lead to a breakdown rather than to the resurrection of feelings. Rationality in family life and problems must have a place.
You need to remember that the goal of falling in love with your husband again is a real and necessary one. Another question is whether the girl is ready to radically change for the sake of achieving family harmony.
For such purposes, psychologists have compiled a series of recommendations that will help to save any relationship, and it absolutely does not matter whether it is official or not.
Each couple has its own history of acquaintance and relationship, important events, dates, places.
By remembering such details, feelings can be revived by reliving the moments anew. Only it is important to talk unobtrusively with your husband about the memories. You can ask him to meet in a meaningful place or include a memorable song.
Men aren’t soulless either, and memories can help push them to experience new things.
The more time a couple spends together, the stronger the bond with each other. It is not necessary to go to expensive resorts. Hikes to a picnic or a movie will also bring variety.
During walks the couple should not be distracted by others. They should pay attention to themselves and their relationships.
Men often look at other women, which catches their wives off guard. But they do this not with malice, but out of banal curiosity.
Some wives in such cases choose an aggressive model of behavior, spoiling a well-started evening with their manners. However, aggression and yelling about infidelity in this case is not the answer.
It is important to keep an eye on the kind of women a man looks at. If those who wear mostly skirts – add them to your closet. For brunettes – think about changing the image.
It is important to choose the tactics of passive resistance, aggression will only worsen the situation.
Taking care of yourself
Competent care of your appearance will help to excite the interest of men again.
When the lady is neglecting herself, the man may be even embarrassed to show her in public.
From this many wives begin to sit at home and cry about destiny. Instead of changing the image, doing sports and taking care of themselves.
Sincere communication will also help in strengthening the bond and renewing feelings between spouses.
Not all couples manage to find common topics of conversation. They can be varied by finding common hobbies. You can start small: watch a movie together and try to discuss it.
The wife should not “nag” husband, and become his companion and friend, on which you can rely.
Some psychologists advise to listen to the interests of men and adjust to them. But the pride of some people does not allow to change their interests for the sake of men.
It is important to understand that men are not soulless creatures, the initiative will be noticed in any case. If a girl is sincerely interested in his pastime, then the man will have a reciprocal interest. Sometimes the initiative must be above hubris.
The man should not always be the initiator in a relationship.
When no action is seen from the wife, the husband may subconsciously begin to feel unwanted, changing his attitude towards her in a negative way.
Women should be creative, sometimes to seduce her husband, to show interest. This way he will feel needed, and there will be no reason for negative changes.
INTERESTING! How to make a man fall in love with you again?
A change of scenery
A trip together or a boat ride will help get rid of the boring routine.
Do not immediately jump into all the cracks and change your place of residence. But it is necessary to diversify the location of your residence.
You may also want to start a small cosmetic repairs to the apartment.
Fight with the routine
The fight against routine is of paramount importance for the stabilization of family relationships.
You have to understand that you have to constantly surprise your husband.
Groundhog Day sometimes makes things easier, when a man knows exactly what he will do in an hour or two. But sometimes you can order food delivery instead of the standard dinner, save time and watch a movie.
You can also update the style of home clothes, getting rid of shapeless robes.
What not to do
Don’t let yourself go weak emotionally.
8 out of 10 family scandals – the fault of the wife.
Ladies are often intemperate, so the man, coming home, is already a priori set up for conflict. Ignore or joke thrown about the conflict situation, will smooth out the sharp corners.
You should not give your husband a reason to have an affair on the side. Of course, both are guilty of adultery. But if a woman will not run herself, then the man will not have the desire to go left. This is worth remembering before you roll up another scandal or miss the opportunity to change lives.
In no case should you blackmail your husband with food or intimacy. It is important to understand that for them, these two factors are the basis of family comfort. Intimacy should be varied and unobtrusive, and the food tasty.
It is not necessary in every way to remind a man about his shortcomings. Chances are, he always had them, just before there was no reason to focus on them. This greatly impairs self-esteem, and can further damage the relationship.
Instead of reproaching, it is sometimes better to remain silent. Often after conflicts on this ground husbands are even more likely to show flaws, as if to protest against his wife’s behavior. Calm and care – the best way to rid your husband from smoking or addiction to computer games in the evenings.
How to make a man fall in love with you – 10 ways that work without fail.
A man, like a child, should not be blamed for the habits that a woman allows herself. Discourage from the company of friends, although she herself spends time with her friends, deprive the meal on the couch, when she herself eats near the TV. Such behavior will cause even more resentment.
On the contrary, you need to show attention and bring your husband dinner to the TV or computer. Yes, it is harmful, but such a gesture will show him that feelings are at the same level.
How to return the love of your husband
After the candy and bouquet period, family life no longer seems to be such a fairy tale, as it is presented by most girls.
Psychologists believe that both partners are to blame for the cooling of feelings during married life.
But there are recommendations that will help a woman to return a man’s love, you just need to take the initiative.
After the divorce
Divorce is a delicate matter and always unpleasant. Most girls are more acutely experiencing such an event than men.
However, after a period of emotional instability comes common sense. It is he who tells a woman that her husband can return. First it is important to accept and understand the cause of this situation, and then already take steps.
There are a number of practical recommendations:
- The first, and not the easiest stage will be the restoration of communication. Most couples break up by no means on a positive note, and this step can be difficult for both of them. But if a woman will show cunning and wit, her plans will be successful. For example, you can give her husband a forgotten thing and use this as an excuse to continue talking. Female hidden manipulations with the right application will also not be superfluous,
- If the communication began by phone, do not run to the goal like mad, the haste may spoil the efforts previously made. To achieve the desired, it is important to wait for a convenient moment and see if there is a response impulse from the man,
- Next, you can offer to meet. Only immediately insist on a romantic evening is not necessary. To begin with, try to see each other on neutral territory. The woman should be well-groomed and rested, this kind of look will arouse the interest of men,
- It is important to try to get his attention by any adequate methods. Sincere conversations and interest in his life. Advice or just the ability to listen will be a great reason to renew old feelings.
At all stages, it is important to observe the man’s behavior. Excessive pressure will only push him away and make things worse. You have to act with his reaction in mind. Sometimes you have to take a step back, but the result is worth it.
If a woman feels his desire for a truce, but he does not talk about it openly, you should not fall into despair. You can use a woman’s cunning and hint at a romantic evening.
If the couple decide to get together after hard work to restore the relationship, it is important not to make the same mistakes. It is necessary to discuss all the intricacies of life together, and not to live in uncertainty.
A woman needs to remember that the man will begin to change, seeing her change. Therefore the first lady should often take the initiative. Change the style of dress and behavior – already a big job, and a man will appreciate the work on its own merits.
Watch this video. How to fall in love with her husband again?
After the betrayal
Infidelity is not the most pleasant event in the life of a married couple. Usually it occurs when the situation has reached its peak, the limit.
Then a woman needs to choose a slightly different model of behavior:
- Show wisdom. If adultery happened for the first time, you need to realize it and put it out of your mind. The mistake of many ladies are constant memories of an unpleasant moment. Such thoughts will in no way lead to rapprochement,
- Emotional instability in this situation is understandable. But scandalize on an empty place is not worth it, it is better to keep silent, albeit through force. Soon it will be much easier to react,
- It is necessary to become to her husband and his wife, and mistress and friend. It’s not as hard as it seems at first glance. It is enough to show a little ingenuity and feminine ingenuity not to throw tantrums over nothing. Man should feel the variety and peace, and not a constant atmosphere of tension. Then go to the left side he just will not have cause.
You need to improve yourself, not look at the mistress.
Of course, the details can be noticed, but by asking silly questions and exacerbating the situation, you can not add stability.
How to return the passion
It happens that the man directly says that he is tired of family life. In this case, it is important to try to have a constructive dialogue, not to act on emotion. It is necessary to analyze the words spoken by her husband, to criticism should treat as cool and sober as possible.
First of all, you need to work on the mistakes that make your husband nervous. And then you can make a personal, women’s plan for the return of feelings. For example, start setting him a small, but pleasant surprises.
You can try the tactic of heating up the interest of men with messages of intimate and personal content. Only it is important to be sure that he is not currently engaged in important negotiations or meetings. Flirting inevitably think back to the husband at a time when the relationship was just beginning.
Arrange a family romantic dinner after receiving a reciprocal impulse. It is important to remove any obstacles, even children and animals. The former can be given to grandparents for a couple of days, they will only be glad. It is important to spend time together, get some privacy, renew feelings and interest in each other.
Some people advise you to start rebuilding relationships with the intimate side of life. It is because of the monotony and ordinariness in this area that men often lose interest in their chosen one. The more diversity, the more interest from men.
There is no need to be too obtrusive. Men do not like this.
If he gave a rejection of your plans, it is important as calmly as possible to take it. And when emotions subside, calmly inquire about the reason for refusal. Often it is due to circumstances that have nothing to do with a woman, then the plans can be implemented in another, more convenient time.
On women’s thematic sites you can find some sensible advice on how to solve this problem.
How to fall in love with a guy – 10 ways that work without fail.
By the way, it is one of the top discussed:
- The transformation of a woman sometimes plays a decisive role, giving the necessary impetus for change. It is necessary to look after yourself and periodically change the image, so as not to bore either herself or her husband,
- The secret – in diversity. A woman should be able to reincarnate in different women. For them, it is not so difficult, even interesting. Experience for a woman and variety for a man will strengthen family relationships,
- Sometimes the cause of the problems lies on the surface. The constant employment of women and her perpetually dissatisfied mood rarely serve as a pleasant addition to family life. Therefore, it is worth to return sometimes to the image that attracted her husband a few years ago.
Sometimes conspiracies really help to improve the relationship between the spouses. But they will work only if you believe in them.
The most popular is the following version: “As people look in the mirror, so my husband (name) would look at me! As the soap washes off quickly, so would my husband (name) quickly love me. As the shirt on the body is light, so my husband (name) would be light”.
Say the words above the shirt and the wax of the spouse, then say the words above the shirt. Say the words over the shirt of your spouse, preliminarily burning the collar, it should burn only.
After the ritual, it is important to hide the thing from prying eyes away. Spouse about the ritual do not need to tell.
It is desirable to use for the ritual an old thing of the spouse. The matter is that in old things, there is more energy of the person. The more of it, the more effective the ritual will be. That is why old shirts are the best solution.
Watch this video. How to always remain interesting to her husband?
What to do to make your husband always love
The main mistake women make is trying to keep their husbands on a short leash, to control them. The less control, the calmer the spouse.
It is worth starting to plan the family budget together. Especially if the husband gives all of his salary to his wife, although many psychologists do not think this is the right move.
Constant renewal – the interest of the husband. You need to give yourself freedom, and the relationship of novelty.
Also help keep the family together hobbies, hobbies.
90% of men prefer a confident woman.
To the man’s feelings have not cooled, you need to love herself. But it is important to know the measure. It is necessary to develop an adequate self-esteem, and do not allow weaknesses take over. Your shortcomings to learn to either hide or work on them.
If emotions run wild, you can talk out in a personal diary. By the way, his keeping helps to better see himself from the outside and indirectly contributes to the preservation of family relationships.
How to re-enamuse her husband: psychologists’ tips
Women think, how to interest her husband, when a crisis in the marriage comes, that is, disappearing desire to spend time together, cool feelings, losing common interests. Be sure to support the relationship, especially if they lasted a long time. This will strengthen the union and increase the chances for a happy future. You should not let the situation slide and wait that everything will resolve itself.
The specifics of a long family relationship
The specifics of a long family relationship is that the feelings of the spouses are dulled, romanticism, spark, and awe disappear. Partners communicate differently than they did before. It is good if there is trust in the marriage, the husband and wife talk to each other about everything. This means that their union is strong and happy.
It is worse when the partners live together but do not spend time together, i.e. they are formally in the same apartment, but do not talk, do not share their thoughts and experiences, all their conversations are reduced to the discussion of domestic issues. It follows that we need to communicate more, listen to the person and reckon with his opinion. One way to make her husband cooled again love his wife – start to spend time together and share their experiences, thoughts, ideas.
Why do feelings fade.
Fading of feelings is a natural biochemical process. It is influenced by various factors that shape the image and presentation of the person. At the peak of love, men and women see the object of their feelings prettier, smarter, close their eyes to the obvious flaws. When feelings dissipate, the picture becomes clearer. Not to notice the minuses of the partner is more difficult, because of this relationship deteriorates, passes love, disappears affection.
The birth of a child
The birth of a child is a very difficult period in the family, although it is a happy one. A baby takes a lot of energy, energy, and emotion. Spouses don’t have enough time for themselves, their finances are limited, the quantity and quality of sex decreases, and problems begin to appear in all spheres of life.
Taking care of a newborn brings husband and wife closer together, especially if it is a long-awaited baby. But the woman should not be only fascinated by the child, and the man should not shift all the responsibilities to his spouse.
A son or daughter is always a priority, but rest, self-care, and spending time together should not be forgotten. This leads to people becoming estranged from each other. The wife continues to take care of the child, and the husband works or finds a hobby.
It is recommended to do everything together, but to give the other half an opportunity to take a break from everyday worries. Otherwise it will lead to emotional burnout and depression.
Domestic problems can include family conflicts because of everyday routine things, for example, because of the untidiness of the husband, financial worries, annoying bad habits. Sometimes cohabitation becomes simply unbearable.
Constant quarrels kill feelings, so even after 10 years of marriage, when it seems that nothing can be fixed, you need to find the strength to raise the issue. Maybe the spouse is also tired of constant conflict, but do not want to divorce, and still hope to restore the former love, to restore confidence.
It is recommended to show less aggression, not to reproach your partner. It is important to compromise, and then the other half will want to give in some way.
Disappointments in expectations
This happens in young families when the couple just formalized the relationship. Sometimes it becomes critical and the union falls apart. It is worth trying again to fall in love with her husband, if people still have points of contact. To do this it is recommended to try to understand what exactly is disappointed in a man. Maybe it will be able to compensate, or to do something to please him again. But this is only possible if there are objective criteria, reasons.
Very often young people build an image in his head, which is far from the real person – a future or current wife. In that case, the guy should work on himself, the girl is not going to help.
There is no point in winning anymore.
Another sign that leads to the extinction of feelings is that the partner is losing interest in his wife. It is recommended to keep yourself busy all the time – to watch your appearance, to develop, to improve. Then the guy will be in an endless race, which he likes. If he realizes that the woman is not interested in anyone but him, then the emotions will gradually lose, routine and life will remain.
This behavior is peculiar to young couples. But not all men are willing to play such games, if it does not fit their temperament. Create some artificial obstacles, to build an image that is incomprehensible to the spouse, it is not worth it, because it is unlikely to lead to the desired result.
Problems in intimate life
Problems in sex arise if the couple does not discuss sex life much. This is often relevant after the birth of a child – there is no strength, energy, time for a spouse, the appearance after childbirth deteriorates, there are complexes. It is very important to make intimacy some variety, to experiment. Sex – the most important part of the relationship, without it there will be many problems in different areas of life, not related to each other.
You need to think about whether everything is good in terms of sexual intimacy, as well as what your husband thinks about it. The partners’ views can vary greatly, so it’s still worth asking for an opinion, even if the girl anticipates the answer.
Sometimes women are at a loss after an affair. The best way out of such a situation is to let him know that he is missing something valuable. After many years of marriage, the spouse stops seeing sexuality in the companion and starts looking for connections on the side. It is necessary to constantly rekindle interest, and then the partner’s feelings do not fade.
How to resume feelings
It is possible to fall in love with your husband a second time, but it requires a lot of effort. A woman needs to understand that her spouse will not love her if she treats herself with indifference. It is impossible to forgive insults, to forget bad moments, to turn a blind eye to the actions of the lover. The spouse must respect the girl with whom he married – without respect there will be no love, no harmonious family life.
Initially it is necessary to focus on yourself: to do appearance, find a hobby, girlfriends, friends. It is important to give men to understand that the range of interests in girls is wider than the management of the household. You should tell your partner more about your impressions, making a variety of communication, and ask what happened to him.
It is important to get out of the familiar environment, to change locations. Weekends spent in nature, on visits to friends, in shopping malls, cinemas, sports complexes.
So spouses all your free time will be together, but each will remain at work, which will be interesting to him.
New sensations in sex
It is important to pay special attention to your sex life. Will be able to help by visiting a sexologist, frank discussions, experiments in bed, a change of scenery, a new intimate experience. Be sure to ask what he lacks a man, express yourself. Surely the husband will be happy, impressed and excited if the spouse demonstrates sexual interest.
Any innovations should not be forced on someone in the couple. A woman should not indulge her partner’s desires if there are some unacceptable things in terms of sexual intimacy. This will not save the relationship, on the contrary, it will make it worse.
Get rid of the routine in your everyday life
Women make mistakes by misinterpreting the recommendations of experts. By getting rid of the routine and drab means the beginning of a more active life, full of bright events. Changes in activities, there are other emotions, which makes the feelings for his spouse, as partners have a new experience together.
It is not necessary to perform thoughtless actions, if there is no need for them. It is also not recommended to reproach your spouse, if he does not want to change the habitual way of life. Learning to enjoy ordinary things is difficult, but it can be learned. By hobby we mean not only the development in something specific, but also unusual types of recreation.
Example: instead of watching TV at the weekend it is better to go to nature, fishing, cooking on a fire, watching the sunset. It’s inexpensive, entertaining and will suit almost anyone. The next free days would be nice to go to the cinema, the rink, the pool, a massage, etc.
Recall pleasant moments
If fragments of the past periodically arise in your head and thoughts about how good it was a few years ago, you should share your experiences with your husband. There is a chance that he, too, is nostalgic for the old days. Nothing prevents the couple from recreating those bygone moments, or creating new ones that are just as interesting.
This is a great excuse to organize a romantic event. For example, the anniversary of some insignificant event, which evokes warm and reverent memories. This can be the date of the first date or acquaintance.
Take care of your appearance
You can try to change your image. This includes a change of style, makeup, haircuts and hairstyles. It is also recommended to eliminate objective flaws, if possible: lose weight, fix your skin, and clean up. This will bring a share of novelty and variety into the relationship. Experimenting with appearance is useful for both women and men.
It is important to always look after yourself, even if the girl spends most of her time at work and household chores.
Provoke a little jealousy in him.
With a provocation to jealousy you have to be careful. If you overplay it, then the marriage will collapse. A woman’s goal is to let her husband know that she is attractive to other young men as well. You can not flirt in front of her husband, flirting, starting a relationship with someone. It is necessary to demonstrate their own attractiveness and draw the attention of her lover.
Meet in the evening with hugs and kisses.
In everyday life, the girl should be more gentle, kind, accommodating, then the partner will be able to feel that there is a dear person near him, whom you do not want to lose. Caring and creating comfortable conditions for coexistence in the same house strengthens the relationship, minimizing conflicts and quarrels.
Meet a man from work with a hug, kisses and questions about how the day’s work, and then let him talk and talk about current issues. Spouse feel needed and loved, and even if there is a good reason, you do not want to fight.
Praise the man on the little things
In such a delicate matter should not ignore the advice of a psychologist. Experts recommend to praise your spouse and support him in everything. For many representatives of the male sex, it is very important to be proud of them. The wife should demonstrate this: talk about how well the favorite did that, what great ideas he has, he will definitely succeed. The wife should understand that no one but her will encourage the guy, although he may miss it.
Mock, to point out the shortcomings in no case can be. This lowers the self-esteem of the man, causes him a lot of unpleasant feelings, makes him look for people who will support him. Even if the husband is up to something that the girl does not particularly like, you need to speak out tactfully.
Have a heart-to-heart talk
Again fall in love with her husband will be possible if you bring to the relationship something intimate, heartfelt. Partners should talk more about what they have inside, open. This will make them more relational, to strengthen the marriage. Any emotions should be shown and talked about. You can not hoard everything inside. Often couples who have lived together for many years need someone to talk to, because there are problems in the family. But family is just the people who will always listen, support, understand, reassure. If there was a desire to express his thoughts, then it is better to tell your spouse, especially if it concerns him too.
How to maintain a renewed relationship
Spouses are sure to encounter a time when everything in their life together will improve, but it becomes unclear how to maintain this state. The answer is simple – you need to do the same things regularly, that is, always take care of yourself and your body, do something new, take care of your other half, but do not fixate only on the marriage.
Never lie, cheat, yell and throw tantrums – bad moments stay in the memory for a long time. It is also important to learn to avoid conflict over nothing, to communicate without swearing, calmly.
What you should not do
You should not try to restore a relationship that is already ruined, for example, if your husband has another woman and he frankly said that he wants to be with her. Do not try to ruin his life, to do something nasty, to spread gossip. Such an outcome should be accepted – the woman will also be able to meet her lover, with whom there will not be the problems that arose before.
Girls who want to get their ex-husband back, most often make a lot of mistakes, because of which the relationship deteriorates even more. The most reasonable method of making contact – directly tell the man that feelings have not yet passed, and then listen to his opinion. Maybe the sincerity will bribe a guy, and he will reciprocate. Also, women should pay attention to the following nuances:
- You can’t rebuke a man as if all the current troubles appeared because of him. Relationships are what bring both of them together.
- You should not present problems as if they were an excuse for divorce. They should be seen as a small difficulty that can be dealt with together.
- It is not recommended to share emotions with relatives and friends. Until the relationship is normalized, you should not talk about it at all.
You should not be in a hurry to find a solution. There is no need for urgent changes in appearance, activities and experiments in sexual terms. Let it come into the marriage gradually.
Advice from psychologists
In order for the husband to love his wife again, psychologists recommend to focus not on him, but on himself. It is important for a woman to understand how she feels in the marriage, whether she wants to please her husband or is trying not to adjust to him. There are people who meet with internal resistance that prevents them from being closer. In this situation there is a desire to do the opposite, unconsciously provoking a scandal. These cases require psychoanalytic intervention, it is unlikely to be able to deal with the problem independently. You also need to understand:
- why the relationship went bad;
- if the spouses had been close before;
- what their love is based on.
If there are specific reasons, it is necessary to solve them. It is difficult for people to understand something, even if it is on the surface, so you can’t avoid sessions with a psychologist. He will help make sense of the current situation from a different perspective.
Specialist in personal development and family relationships, practicing psychologist. Work experience of more than 15 years.
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