How to know how a guy feels?

How to check a man’s feelings for a woman – psychologist’s tips

When you meet a man and you start a relationship, sometimes there are doubts. Does he really love you and everything is serious from his side? You do not want to be deceived and spend years building a union, which for men does not mean as much as it does for you.

What to do to avoid this? Is it possible to check the sincerity of his feelings? And how to do it correctly?

Will the “test” help.

You always want to know that a man is honest with you and really has serious intentions. Therefore, some women decide that it is worth making sure that “for sure”. They arrange a variety of tests. For example, begin anonymous correspondence with a man. Or send his girlfriend, so she tried to “seduce” him.

There are cases when a girl lies about being pregnant to see his reaction, because if a man loves, he should be happy. These methods may seem effective, especially when they are advised by friends or “people from the internet.

But it is important to remember that every action has its consequences. The problem with these checks is that if they are revealed-and they usually are-it can ultimately lead to a breakup. Any test is an undermining of trust.

The man will feel deceived, untrustworthy. Starting a relationship with deception is not the best way to build a long-term union.

In this regard, it’s important to put yourself in the man’s shoes. Imagine how you would feel if he gave you a similar test. Even its successful passage will cause you a lot of negative and very contradictory feelings. You will feel insulted.

Therefore, men’s feelings about such tests are justified. Such ways can ruin even the most ideal relationship.

Signs of sincerity of his feelings

In terms of psychology, checks can really ruin your union. Instead of arranging them, it is worth analyzing the relationship, look at them objectively. It is important to remove the “rose-colored glasses” and look at the situation sensibly. This will help you make sure that the man is sincere.

Number of gifts, compliments and declarations of love does not always indicate that the man really in love and set up a long relationship. There are several signs that show a man is sincere in his feelings:

  • He wants to help you – and not when you’ve asked him 10 times. If he finds out you have a problem that he can help you with, he’ll offer it himself. Of course, it’s not about “pinning” responsibility for all your troubles on him. But you can see that he is willing to share them with you;

5 non-obvious signs of a man’s love

  • The man is interested in you and your life – your communication is not limited to the banal “how are you? He is interested in your thoughts, feelings, hobbies, your friends, desires and plans for the future;
  • The man “fits” you into his plans. Listen to him talk about the future. “When next year we’ll go on vacation,” “if in two years we get married,” “when we’ll have a baby.” Of course, no one knows for sure how life will turn out. But phrases like these show what he’s counting on;
  • The man lets you into his life – you don’t just go on dates. He introduces you to his relatives, friends, shares his thoughts, experiences and desires;
  • He’s excited to meet you – pay attention to his emotions. Is he excited? Does he or she respond quickly to messages? Is he smiling? Do you catch him staring at you?
  • When he’s fighting, he’ll compromise and understand your point of view – it’s not about being right, it’s about making peace with you. That doesn’t mean that the man has to give in to everything. It’s about the fact that he really wants you to understand each other;
  • the man doesn’t criticize you or tell you how you should act, but respects your opinion – he’s not trying to “set you up” for himself;
  • When you’re in a large group of people, the man keeps paying attention to you – you catch his eyes, he notices who you’re talking to and what mood you’re in. This shows that he cares about you.

One of the important indicators by which you can understand the sincerity of a man’s feelings is how he behaves during a conflict with you. Quarrels always happen in relationships, it’s normal.

Psychologists conclude that this is even a good thing. First, any conflict helps to strengthen the relationship and teaches you to come out of it correctly. Secondly, sometimes without conflict it is impossible to really get closer and understand each other.

Pay attention to the attitude he shows “on emotion.” What he says, what he does, how he behaves. When a person loses control, you can understand his true intentions and thoughts. Don’t assume that he just said something “in the heat of the moment.” It’s phrases like that that tell you his true attitude.

Why do you want to put him to the test

In addition to paying attention to the man’s actions, try to analyze yourself. Why do you have doubts about your lover? After all, they do not occur “in an empty place”, they always have a reason. But not always the reason – it.

There are several reasons for you to have doubts:

  • self-doubt, low self-esteem – you think that you do not deserve such a man. If so, it is important to understand where this distorted belief comes from and correct it, otherwise you will always doubt;
  • Unfortunate past experiences – if you’ve already had relationships that ended in deception, but you haven’t been able to get over them and let them go. It is important to understand why you are still “holding on” to that relationship and why you are projecting your ex’s actions onto your current man;
  • Disrupted attachment in childhood – if you had problems with their parents, you have experienced from them coldness or, conversely, hyper. In this case, you need to clearly understand the reasons for their doubts, and not look for them in the man;
  • man gives you reason to doubt – it happens that he behaves in such a way that you cease to be confident in the sincerity of his feelings. Analyze what it is in his behavior that causes you to have such thoughts. Is the reason for them really objective? If so, it is important to clarify everything with a man, take it out in a frank conversation and do not be afraid to lose the relationship.

In a relationship it is important to have trust in each other. If it is not there, you need to figure out the reason. Fooling yourself, running away that “you’re winding yourself up” is not the best strategy. It is important to clarify your doubts at the very beginning, to find their source.

This will only bring you closer and strengthen the emotional connection. Do not be afraid to be honest. If a man loves you, he’s no less interested in the relationship than you are.

The more you doubt, the more tense your relationship will become. There will be jealousy, a desire to control each other, and resentment. To avoid this, you need to learn to talk to each other frankly.

How to check the man’s feelings, how to understand that he loves you?

It is often difficult for a woman to understand how a guy treats her. This applies to unfamiliar men, and regular partners. At some point it becomes unclear what to count on in the future and how serious his intentions. Then we have to think of ways to check the man’s feelings, because directly ask is inconvenient.

How to check whether a man loves you?

In this case, you should not be in a hurry. Remember that everyone loves in his own way and maybe your partner shows his feelings as he knows how. And if his behavior does not meet your expectations, it does not mean that he does not love you. So first try to understand him. When that fails, give him a push:

  • Start acting indifferent . Psychologists believe that this is one of the most reliable ways to get a man “out in the open”. If he is interested in you, he will worry, will ask what happened, call more often, to pay attention;
  • Or you can leave, not many people go through the test of distance. You will immediately feel care and attention even if he is far away, if he will really miss you;
  • Tell him that you want him to meet your parents. This is a responsible moment, he will immediately understand the seriousness of your intentions. And either he will agree, which already means something, or he will simply disappear from the horizon.

So, the main tip – watch. Mark whether he cares, whether he cares, whether he listens to your opinion and whether he gives in.

A man remembers only the important information.

Pay attention to little things, sometimes they help to build a more complete picture of what is happening. When we have something important, we try to remember it or write it down so that not to forget. Whether it is an event that can not be missed or a phone number.

It’s the same situation with a young man. Remember, does he always wish you happy birthday, remember when your mom’s anniversary is? Or does he regularly skip these events.

It’s also important whether he remembers your phone number by heart or can only name it by looking in his smartphone notebook. If he loses the device, he won’t be able to contact you if he hasn’t tried to learn the cherished digits.

Of course, circumstances are different, and it is far from an indication of indifference if he forgot to wish you happy birthday. Could be important things – work or study, or tired. Do not sound alarmed. But such events still leave a mark and form a certain opinion in his direction.

How to check the man for sincerity of feelings?

Think about how frank he is. Does he tell you about his troubles, about his past life and family. After all, only with a truly beloved person can share privacy. If he hides, fails to tell, does not want you to know the story of his family – then his feelings may not be sincere.

And also pay attention to how he behaves when he is with you. There are things that show how he treats you on a subconscious level. It is a basic care:

  1. Whether he helps you carry heavy bags, whether he holds the door;
  2. How he responds to requests for help and assistance;
  3. How he says goodbye. Reread the messages, see what words are at the end, whether they speak of tenderness and care.

If you can’t objectively assess his behavior, ask a friend to help. Spend a few weekends or evenings together and let her observe. Only choose for this purpose a person who can be trusted with such sensitive topics.

What shouldn’t you do?

The main thing now is not to do anything stupid. Some women go to extremes, and then regret their mistakes. Noticing that you are trying to check it, the man may be offended.

He also will not trust you and the case may end with separation. To avoid this should not happen:

  • Make him jealous . Flirting lightly with another in the presence of his beloved, late phone calls or other similar tricks can convince him that you are cheating. Then he’ll either just get up and leave, or he’ll slowly cheat too, feeling entitled to it;
  • Temptation . Don’t try to test his reliability by using a beautiful girlfriend. Sometimes this is what girls do, ask a roommate to meet a guy to see how he will do. Often this ends with the roommate marrying your young man.

The best way to clear things up is to talk or at least hint that you are troubled by doubts . Explain what you are missing, what is unclear. It’s an honest and brave act that deserves respect. And most importantly – it will help get rid of misunderstandings.

How do men test women for availability?

Guys are also devious people. They sometimes weave intrigues no worse than women. To understand which girl is more accessible and what feelings she is experiencing, the guys come up with different “moves”:

  • Make them jealous, start conversations about former girlfriends. How to respond to this? The best option is to listen with restraint and just not pursue the subject;
  • Go with her to the expensive store. There, offer to choose anything you like. This way you can see the nature of the woman: one will rush to buy everything, the other will refuse, because it is expensive, and the third will buy her favorite shirt;
  • Getting to know her friends and watching them. If the girl’s surroundings are preoccupied with finding a husband with money and the conversations constantly revolve around financial well-being, the young man may conclude that his chosen one is not affordable to him;
  • They may try to find out the reliability in such a sly way – to send text messages from friends’ numbers with offers to get acquainted;
  • Or they can even persuade a friend to try to have an affair.

Again, it’s best to respond to such behavior with a frank conversation. Clarify what’s going on, why is he giving you an exam? You will disarm him with your directness, and he will have nothing left but to confess what he has done.

Distrust is the flaw of modern man. We are constantly looking for a catch in people, looking at them, listening. And often we offend them with it. So, before you think about how to check the feelings of a man or a girl, decide, maybe time will put everything in its place and there is no need to rush.

Video: a test for feelings

In this video psychologist Diana Volodina will tell you how to find out with an accuracy of 99.9% what a man feels in relation to you, how much he cares about you:

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