How to force yourself not to be jealous?

How do you learn not to be jealous of your wife?

Jealousy is a hard feeling that does not cause pain, but can completely cloud the mind. At first, it is a harmless manifestation that can be controlled. But over time, a person begins to experience anger, panic attacks, aggression. In order not to bring the relationship to collapse, psychologists recommend a man to listen to valuable advice on how to stop being jealous of his wife.

But first deal with the causes, and to consolidate the result understand the consequences of this overpowering feeling.

What is jealousy and why there is jealousy

Jealousy is a feeling with a negative connotation, arising in the interpersonal relationship of the couple. Most often, it is accompanied by distrust about the honesty and loyalty of the other half. This can be both justified and completely contrived opinion, provoked by various reasons.

There can be several reasons for jealousy:

  1. Fear – on the background of strong feelings, emotional attachment to the other half, periodically there may be a fear of losing her.
  2. Complexes – the most common causes of jealousy, which are typical more often for women. If a man has complexes about appearance, self-sufficiency, success, he may fear that his wife will leave him because of a better nominee for her heart.
  3. Insecurity – If a man doubts how strong the feelings of his beloved, whether the attachment between them is strong, it can cause attacks of this unpleasant feeling.
  4. Dependence on her – strong attachment can provoke obsessions, fears of being abandoned.
  5. Mistrust – more often than not, suspicions of infidelity are caused by a negative example from a past relationship.
  6. Projecting their repressed desires onto a partner – often men carefully hide their sexual fantasies, desires. Without admitting it to themselves, they attribute it to the other half.
  7. The desire to control everything – worrying about his place in the life of the beloved woman, the guy controls her every move.
  8. Obsessive thinking – obsessive thoughts on the background of compulsive disorder. Not knowing the truth, a man begins to invent reality, to create facts in his head. The reason for this is the banal fear of the unknown.
  9. There were real reasons – perhaps in the relationship surfaced correspondence on the side, flirting, ambiguous acquaintances or friends.
  10. The imposition of such thoughts by others – some men succumb to the influence of relatives, friends. And if loved ones repeatedly suspect a woman of cheating, sooner or later this thought will stick in his head.

How to overcome jealousy and self-infatuation

It is impossible to find effective ways to get rid of jealousy of his wife, if you do not recognize the problem, and then do not find its root cause. To get rid of obsessive feelings will not be so easy, for this a man should learn self-control. Thoughts and real life are different things.

After realizing this fact, stick to a few rules:

  1. Do not submit to jealousy . If you dwell on these thoughts, fear, panic, anger will begin to progress, taking over reason. You won’t be able to get rid of them completely, just learn how to weaken them.
  2. Uncertainty is the norm in relationships. No one can give you a 100% guarantee if you will be together with a woman for the rest of your life. There is no insurance against divorce, adultery, and the cooling down of feelings. You have to accept that no one can control the future.
  3. Find ways to improve the relationship. To stop feeling fear, you need to trust your partner. It is possible only in a harmonious relationship. Radiate your chosen one, show love and care, and then she will not be able to think about replacing you by another.
  4. Take care of yourself . The best way to get rid of the complexes, fears, self-doubt – is self-development, learning new talents, finding new hobbies, hobbies. It is important that both partners have personal space.
  5. Show gratitude . In a small dose of jealousy is normal, sometimes even useful. Thank the woman for being around, for all expressions of love.
  6. Foster trust. Trust is difficult, if there are internal problems, doubts. But the man is so strong that he can control himself. Expanding personal space for her, you can cope with fears.
  7. Accept the situation, change your attitude toward it. If the reasons for jealousy is still there, to overcome this feeling will be harder. In such a case, you need to make sure the betrayal, and then decide right away whether to continue the relationship or break it off.

The consequences of jealousy without a reason

Not sure if you should fight your fears, will you be able to cope with such a depressing feeling? Psychology offers many effective ways to overcome jealousy and mistrust of your wife, and also tells about the consequences of not working on yourself. Here is a sample scenario of events:

  • deterioration of the relationship – reproaches, suspicions, surveillance, quarrels, which makes living together unbearable;
  • real infidelity – the more often a person is accused of a transgression, the higher the probability that he will really go to such a step for spite;
  • obsessive states – delusions on the background of jealousy lead to the development of aggression towards the suspect, thoughts begin to grow into confidence which is difficult to change;
  • negative impact on children – if there are children in the family, constant jealousy affects the psychosomatic state, exacerbating diseases;
  • rupture of relationships – no one can long tolerate unfounded accusations, disharmony and unhealthy relationships quickly end.

Advice from psychologists

The best assistant in the question of how to learn not to be jealous of your wife without cause, becomes a psychologist. He not only helps to identify the nature of the problem, but also will find ways not to wind yourself up in vain, to get rid of obsessive states. In such cases, psychologists often recommend the following:

  1. Get busy with your favorite activity . As soon as you began to notice disturbing thoughts about possible cheating on your wife, find any ways to switch. Spend time with friends or relatives, arrange a romantic date with your beloved.
  2. Spend more time in society. Communicating, meeting new people, you can pay more attention to other people’s problems, give advice. In this case, you can unintentionally compare your situation to other concerns, understanding the groundlessness of far-fetched thoughts.
  3. Analyze your past . Perhaps someone from your environment inadvertently planted in your mind thoughts of infidelity spouse. Maybe in a previous relationship the woman was giving about, and you inadvertently began to project that experience onto the current situation.
  4. Give your wife more attention. Romance helps to rekindle passion, good sex and harmony will push anxious thoughts out of her head. And if you are a good husband, there will be no reason for her to look at other guys.
  5. Talk frankly with your spouse . Tell her that you are afraid of losing her, have feelings of jealousy, suffering from it. Maybe she did some pushy things unknowingly. But at the same time emphasize that you trust her not to hurt her. This will help her to show more love, to say some important words.


Each case is individual, but always jealousy requires fighting with yourself. She needs to be hindered, overcome fears, intrusive thoughts. Otherwise, the relationship will become terrible for both partners.

How to stop being jealous and winding yourself finding peace of mind

Harmonious relationships are very thin, they need to learn to possess, to take everything as a given. Unfortunately, it’s difficult to talk about love and happiness, if destructive thoughts clog up your head. But what to do if the emotions overflow and you lose control of the situation? How to stop being jealous and winding yourself up?

In this article, let’s talk about relationships, find a couple of great ways that would have found peace and confidence, which will lead to a harmonious and happy relationships without putting out the brain. Fortunately, experts in the field of psychology have long ago found various solutions to the problems, so it will not be difficult to quickly cure from jealousy.

Article content:

Jealousy is the main killer of relationships and happiness

Why are people jealous? Yes, because they believe that the property of the object of admiration, that it is their and no one can give. This trend is very sad effect on the object of jealousy, he is constantly under stress if jealousy is manifested openly. If a person does not have a strong guilt complex, rather, the relationship will break up quickly, and even the presence of children will not stop. Guide to changing yourself.pdf Subscribe to Telegram Just imagine that you are constantly blaming and controlling whether you will tolerate this attitude? If a person wants to change he will find ways and will not be caught red-handed. But being jealous for no reason is a psychological disorder of inferiority that you just need to heal, accept and love.

An example from life: there is a friend, married at 29, she is 25, jealous of everything, even at work (small business) communicating with an accountant. He says change your job so you can communicate less with women. She constantly yells at him if a girl looks in his direction. How long do you think that lasted? But now his whole side of the family thinks he is a jerk and a cable after the divorce. Is that normal? The answer is obvious.

Male Jealousy

Usually male jealousy is much stronger than female jealousy and can easily escalate into a pathological stage. For a man who is ready for a relationship is very important to continue his family line and his children come first, so if he is jealous, then there is, somewhere deep down, the fear that in his place is claimed by someone else.

Naturally, all this comes from antiquity, from the Stone Age, when the main task was to feed and reproduce, so that mankind could continue to survive. The breeders were usually either those who were strong or those who could bring food, so if a man feels jealousy, it means he feels his insecurity that he cannot feed his family and his place will be taken by another pretender.

Pathological male jealousy and insecurity can escalate into revenge and is probably the saddest manifestation.

Female Jealousy

The roots come from childhood in the relationship between father and daughter, the girl did not receive enough love from her father and was jealous of her mother or another object that her father paid more attention to.

Next, the girl begins to grow and develop such an inferiority complex and broadcast the strategy to all the relationships she has in the course of her life, well, then the famous “All men are assholes!”

Be more jealous to neutralize the jealousy

Let’s say your psyche suffers from uncontrollable jealousy, so let’s give it some control. Try to consciously start being jealous of everything, just start being jealous of everything and with more force. Bring the matter to the point of absurdity, make fun of yourself, just don’t tell the object of jealousy about it. The more you are jealous, the less you want to be jealous, with this all is simple.

The main task is to do it consciously, for example: you say to yourself, now I’ll be jealous of your spouse for 10 minutes to everything, even to myself. I wonder by the way, can a man be jealous of himself? I have a suspicion that such an absurdity can also happen.

What do we end up with? We get mental nausea from the manifestation of jealousy and, most importantly, awareness in the emotions. Yes, this is good, but we need to eliminate other related things as well.

Proper self-esteem is the path to happiness

When you show emotions of jealousy you belittle yourself in relation to the object of jealousy, think bad of yourself and are afraid of losing, then the manipulation of if I am jealous, then he is to blame and you try to impose guilt on the object.

This is the standard manipulation of trying to attach to yourself. It makes you want to curse loud and long, isn’t it obvious that this model of behavior doesn’t work? I can see why our divorce rate is high. But instead of complaining, let’s solve problems as they come in.

Jealousy is the inner pain that breaks relationships

Let me guess, any relationship you have goes in a circle, in a certain scenario, the more you love, the more you feel pain, fear of betrayal and disappointment. Which leads to constant stress and the risk of serious illness. And it happens all the time, like a broken record.

The only proper solution to deal with the problem of jealousy is to find the root, which lies deep in childhood. If you find the root cause, the problem will go away forever and bring trust back into the relationship.

In 30 minutes I will walk you through all the states that are responsible for jealousy and find the root cause of jealousy and understand what to do about it so it is no longer in your life.

Click the button below to be guaranteed a solution to your jealousy problem.

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Client Results

Getting rid of jealousy in 1 appointment

Who: Woman 57 years old

Problem: Strong jealousy of her husband

What do you want in place of the problem: Calmness, freedom, confidence.

Main state that was responsible for jealousy: “I am unwanted.”

Secondary states: Humiliation, betrayal, I am the worst, I am not understood, I am underestimated.

How the problem was solved: We divided the problem of jealousy into states, the most important and strongest “I am unnecessary. Then found the root of the problem, located at the age of 5.

Her mom used to lock her and her sister at home alone so they wouldn’t go anywhere. We worked through the problem, closed the gestalt, the problem went away.

In order to solve the problem of jealousy completely, it was necessary to work through the secondary states. To do this, I use the method I developed and remove 5 states at once.

I do not feel jealousy anymore.

Therapy time: 105 minutes

Depression! When antidepressants don’t help!

Who: A woman in her 40s.

Problem: Depression, while on antidepressants. Unwillingness to live

What one wants in place of the problem: Serenity, desire to live, joy of life

Main condition that was responsible for the depression: “Anger at my father.

Secondary conditions: I want nothing, everything irritates me, I cannot find a place, fear of death, melancholy, resentment of the father

How the problem was solved: We took the most important condition “Anger at Father”, found out a negative condition in the body (all our conditions are always in the body). We dipped into childhood, found a traumatic memory. We closed the gestalt, worked through the situation, filled the picture with love.

Then we removed secondary problems all at once.

Observation of the condition: “It appears or does not appear.

For 30 days there had been no depressions. We continued monitoring.

Time of treatment: 85 minutes

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