How to date a lover?

How to behave with a married man to get the most out of this relationship

How to behave with a married man, so that the relationship brought the maximum pleasure, only the temptresses know. As a rule, the conscious choice of position mistress make already married ladies or women who do not like “live happily ever after”. Meetings without obligation, each of which is filled with romance and vivid sex, can paint the gray of everyday life.

Nevertheless, even the most pleasant holidays, which take place almost every day, you may eventually get bored. So your partner may be bored with his mistress, and he will want fresh emotions. Deliver him from even trying to think about a new passion will help our tips on how to behave with a married man.

Features of the relationship with a married man

Many women tend to mistakenly believe that by registering their marriage to a man, they will thus bind him to themselves forever. But, unfortunately, this is far from the case. Now, however regrettable to realize, adultery is becoming a common phenomenon. The man is not stopped by the stamp in his passport, nor by the presence of children. A couple who has been married for many decades and in which the spouses are faithful to each other – a real rarity.

Sometimes it happens that a man and a woman meet at a friendly party and spend the night together, after which they never meet again. They are linked only pleasant memories of the minutes of unbridled passion and nothing more. But more often such a relationship lasts for several years.

It turns out the union in which a man and a woman are in unequal conditions. In principle, she is happy, but does not have his favorite 100%, is constantly in the expectation that he is just about to come to her and stay forever. A man, on the contrary, gets the best of everything: his mistress takes care of herself, is always in a great mood, arranges romantic dinners, does not reproach, is able to listen and support when he needs it so much. Even if all this a man does not get from his wife, he is quite happy with what he gives him a mistress.

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A woman in a relationship with a married man must be mentally prepared to live in constant tension. She is always waiting for him to make time to meet or spend the New Year vacations with her. And the main expectation is his divorce from his wife. As a rule, the right time to divorce his spouse never comes. In addition, constantly there are some events that prevent this: the children have not yet reached adulthood, my beloved mother-in-law is ill, my wife will not survive such a blow, finding out that her husband had an affair on the side for almost five years, etc.

It turns out that all his life a woman has to stay in such a difficult mental state: to torment himself with remorse and continue this relationship or force of will to break this vicious circle and leave his beloved, returning to his family. Sometimes conscience begins to prevail, I want to run away and forget everything. But then he comes again, confesses his love, and she once again melts in his arms. So that ladies do not make mistakes, being in a similar situation, we will help you find the answer, how to behave with a married man, if you are a mistress.

10 rules of conduct with a married man that will help not to dissolve into him

1. Talking about his wife under the strictest prohibition

Many women make the grave mistake of trying to ask their lover about his family and their relationship with his wife. Do you really think that he is now honestly tell you the whole truth? Surely he will try to convince you that he is so unhappy with her, he had to get married, there has never been love, and in general he is with her because of pity, and they sleep in separate rooms for over a year. You can go on and on listening to these fables. All the same, you will never hear an honest answer, which sounds something like this: “I am so comfortable,” “I have fun with you and with his wife. If you don’t want to traumatize your psyche even more, don’t look for answers to such questions.

Do not, under any circumstances, stoop to insulting his wife. It’s his choice, and by speaking unflatteringly about her, you’re humiliating him. The man may take it as a personal insult.

2. Don’t cause a scandal.

The second prohibition – do not cause a scandal married lover. Surely he gets it all from his dearest spouse. Do not try to control his every move, do not make any demands and do not drive him into a box. You’re still not able to fully seize his free time and himself. Remember, since you’ve chosen for yourself this way, learn to be fundamentally different from his wife: next to you he should feel love, affection, care and understanding. Be easy, positive and calm in his presence.

If you entered into a relationship with a married man, pursuing only selfish goals, it is likely that your relationship will be short-lived. Men are very sensitive to insincerity. Also, do not give a man expensive gifts – this can cause him a lot of trouble when he will be justified in front of his wife, explaining their appearance.

Do not fall in love with a married lover

If you are bored, lonely or simply decide to behave in such a way as to raise your self-esteem with a married man, there is a very real risk of falling in love with him without memory. Of course, it is possible that in your case there will be a happy ending, he will leave his family for you and you will live with him happily ever after. But the chances are slim. Much more likely the following scenario: you will lose your head in love with him, after a while you will have to break up, as he has no right to leave his wife and children, and you will be struggling with depression on your own. Believe me, building a new relationship with a free member of the stronger sex will be very difficult for you.

4. Do not blame yourself.

Not always a woman is aware that her chosen one is not free. Or, perhaps, the passion aroused the head of both, and you can not cope with their feelings. It is possible that his feelings are sincere. But more often it turns out that a man just wants to diversify his boring family life.

Nevertheless, no one removes the responsibility from the woman. In any case, the only winner here is the man. He had fun and as if nothing happened, he returned to his wife, who will forgive him and will continue to build their cozy family nest.

Keep a sober mind, do not lose your head. As soon as you start to seem suspicious of his behavior, do not hesitate to get out of the relationship. It won’t do you any good.

5. Remove your rose-colored glasses as quickly as possible.

Of course, you simply do not have a chance not to fall head over heels in love with the imposing, handsome, intelligent, handsome man, who buries you generous gifts, and even has a high position. As a rule, men who are not faithful to their wives say the same words to their mistresses:

The wife is a real scandaless, throwing tantrums on and off;

His wife is a mercenary bitch who doesn’t appreciate his kindness, but tries to trick him with money and expensive gifts;

And he has to put up with it all: cooking dinner, doing the laundry, cleaning – everything has to be done by himself;

He and his wife have been living like roommates for over a year, they sleep in separate rooms, what kind of love can we talk about?

Such men are trying to play on pity, telling such stories naive mistress. In fact, he is quite warm and comfortable in bed with both. His wife is quite an adequate woman who certainly doesn’t deserve to be treated that way. So he is trying to deserve even more of your attention and care. After all, you probably can not resist and feel sorry for this poor fellow, who is so unlucky in life.

If you can not stop such a relationship until you can, then at least begin to think that you are being manipulated. In this situation, you certainly do not have to prove anything to anyone, make excuses and feel guilty.

In any case, do not make sacrifices. Spend your evenings the way you want. Have fun with friends, make new friends, enjoy life. Even if you break up with a married man, you will certainly not lose anything of value.

6. Don’t expect a ring from him.

Lovely ladies, well, do not flatter yourself! If a man has many years of family life, quite adequate wife, beloved children, jointly acquired property and the sea of happy moments that unite their family, it is unlikely he will dare to take such a risky step – to abandon everything and start life from scratch. Moreover, it is not known how balanced psyche possesses you. Your relationship is just an affair on the side, which is necessary in order to diversify your life.

7. Be aware of even the little things.

Analyze his behavior. Surely there will be moments that stress you out. He may argue that his wife does not care, but every time she calls rushes to the phone, dashing. He claims that he is bored with his wife, but at the same time disappears for a week or even more, leaving with her to the sea. And in general, it is possible that at this moment your lover besides you is in a relationship with more than one woman.

8. Get everything you wanted – go away.

Be honest with yourself first of all – you wanted to get away from him an expensive necklace, a trip to the Maldives, good sex. Did you get it? Then end the relationship. Maybe it’s too harsh, but it’s honest. Either way, he’s using you, too. So break up with him without regret.

9. Don’t let your personal boundaries be violated.

Don’t live a man’s life. Don’t give up meetings with friends, don’t abandon your favorite hobby. If you don’t know right away that he’s not available, that’s okay. Just advise him to deal with the old relationship first and only then come back to you. Believe me, it is unlikely you will ever meet him again.

10. Do not change your habits.

Psychologists are unanimous in the opinion that only insecure women get involved with married men. Too low self-esteem does not allow them to find a decent man who would cherish this relationship and fear losing it, so they behave so that they dissolve into a married lover without a trace.

3 secrets of behavior with a married man not to bore him

How to behave with a married man so that he was attracted to you? If the relationship with a married man began, let’s figure out how to make him fall in love with you finally and irrevocably and every day he lost his head more and more. It’s no secret that most of these couples hang on sex. No, of course, the connection isn’t solely about the bed, but it is of basic importance. If you decide to play hard to get, the man may quickly lose all interest in you and go looking for a more compliant young lady.

Appearance and sex

You’ll have to forget the phrases “I have a headache now”, “let’s not tonight”, etc. Come to your date, the man obviously expects to be met by a passionate person in erotic lingerie, not a tired woman in a washed robe with dirty hair gathered into a careless bun.

Even if your meeting with him was unplanned, you have to look spectacular. Of course, you don’t have to be in lace lingerie, a transparent robe and with a war paint on your face every time. Just do not be afraid to experiment, show imagination. Surprise your lover with a new image.

Do not take this advice literally. If your relationship will be nothing but sex, then believe me, the man will quickly become cold to you. After all, the relationship based solely on the physical attraction, can not exist for a long time.


In this case we do not mean to listen to all his heartbreaking stories about an evil and misunderstanding boss, strange colleagues and unloved wife. Just give him the opportunity to speak out sometimes, but do not become for him the so-called vest, which he will use in a moment of weakness. You have to remain the woman you love.

Here we are talking about a common hobby. If your lover is a soccer fan, offer him to go together to a match of his favorite team. If he can not live without fishing, organize a joint trip to the nature with fishing rods.

It is extremely important that in addition to common sexual desires unite you and joint hobbies, interests. Sex sooner or later will bore you if there is no spiritual closeness between the partners. Dates will be each time less and less often, and then will stop altogether.

Personal space

Once again, we repeat – do not completely dissolve into a man, even if you love him madly. He will not appreciate it. Moreover, he will consider you uninteresting woman, who has no hobbies and interests. That is, you run the risk of becoming a second wife.

Arrange him periodically little “surprises”: go with friends out of town, turn off the phone, do not go to a page of social networks. He also goes to his wife and children, and you do not ask him what he is doing there. So you are a free woman, free to do whatever you want. The more you are understatement, the longer his interest will last.

Make him jealous of you. This is not about openly flirting with a strange man in his presence. Just light innocent flirting and chatting with a member of the stronger sex is not an illegal act at all. Every man is a hunter who does not intend to tolerate a rival, much less share his trophies with him. Yes, and this way you make sure that men like you and get a portion of endorphins. Who knows, maybe during such harmless flirting you will meet your true destiny.

8 mistakes in behavior with a married man-lover

If you still dared to take such a step and decided to stay in this love triangle, then below we give a number of simple rules, following which you will be able to avoid serious mistakes and, as a consequence, unnecessary worries, tantrums and misunderstandings:

Do not be intrusive. Do not call him a hundred times a day, do not ask for a meeting, do not throw all your business to spend time with him. Take care of yourself, and when he is ready to see you, agree to see him.

Don’t criticize his family, his wife, and don’t demand a divorce. Ideally, move off the subject altogether every time he brings it up himself. If so he tells you about the troubles at home, just listen to him silently.

Do not throw tantrums and showdown for nothing. Home it enough, and you have it come to get a portion of love, affection and understanding. So give it to him.

Throw out the obsession to introduce him to all your friends and acquaintances. A man hides your relationship so he won’t get into a bad situation with his wife or hear condemnation from his friends. You don’t want him to get into serious trouble because of you, do you?

Don’t ask for money and gifts. If a man wants to do you a favor, he does not need to remind you of this. This way you’ll only make him angry and make him doubt your sincerity and unselfish intentions.

Don’t forget about yourself. Always remember that the most important person in your life is yourself. Have fun, be happy and enjoy every moment. No need to completely dissolve in a man, he will not appreciate it.

Do not organize interrogation. He is a free man and does not have to account to you for every step and action.

No need to repeat a hundred times a day about his mad love for him. Do not be obsessive. Talk about it, but not too often.

Now you know how to behave with a married man. If you still dared to take such a difficult step and decided to enter into a relationship with an unmarried man, be kind to adhere to the above rules, which will save you from serious problems in the future. Remember that a relationship with a man in principle requires a lot of effort, and with a married lover to show even more patience and accuracy.

The psychology of relationships: how to behave with a lover, so he himself was drawn to a woman

Is it worth dating a married man: pros and cons

How to behave with a lover, to receive from the relationship a maximum of pleasure and a minimum of mental torment – a whole science. The option of a union with a married man will suit a married lady or a woman who does not want to encroach on personal freedom.

Meetings-holidays with romance, vibrant sex and other attributes will paint the gray of everyday life, allow you to feel desired, special, will give fresh emotions. Do not rely on a joint weekend, will have to put up with the fact that call, write lover can only be in stipulated time.

What to avoid in terms of communication with a man

Some “forbidden” connection passes quickly, while others may last for years. Much depends on how much the partners value each other, what initially created the duo (sex, romance, communication).

If a man lacks understanding, tenderness, unity of souls at home, then with the right approach mistress will be able to build a format of relationships that meet the needs of the partner.

Major mistakes should be avoided.

His family is sacred.

It can be hard to accept that the person you love belongs to someone else. It should be clear from the beginning, until the man himself decides to leave his wife, you can not do anything for a divorce. You can gently guide him, but do not put pressure.

Decide at the start, is it acceptable in your relationship to talk about household chores, problems, discuss spouses, children, parents. If yes, the woman should be participatory, you can not harshly, categorically state what is happening, criticize.

Men often take the position of “only I can beat my smerds”, any harsh word said to his family can turn him against his mistress.

Do not push the situation, revealing his presence by calling and texting his wife. It is not a fact that, once faced with a choice, he will not make it in favor of his lawful spouse, not wanting a change of life, a well-established routine. Negotiate the time and ways of communication. Can I call, write, at what time?

No self-interest

Men are well aware when they just want money, connections, practical help. The lover in fact owes his mistress nothing.

If he has a desire to make her life easier and more enjoyable in the way that is available to him, he will certainly take advantage of the situation. It is worth to voice some points in which it would be appropriate to participate, but in an informative style, without demands. The strong sex, interested in a woman, perfectly hears and understands the hints.

You can not be offended that he is taking the family vacation at an exotic resort, and his mistress presents inexpensive bijouterie. Expressed in a negative way, there is a risk of a rude, unpleasant response.

He certainly will not wake up his conscience from the note of protest. If the material component is important, you should initially look for a sponsor.

Put the drama aside.

A sure way to ruin a relationship is to make a show of suffering. Mistress for a man – a holiday that allows you to escape from the burden of problems, responsibilities, worries.

He craves ease, positive, sensual pleasure – anything but the picture of wringing his hands over the failed call, postponed to another day of the date, suddenly interrupted meeting.

A girl should not reprimand him for the fact that she cooked dinner, prepared herself for a visit, planned the scenario for the evening, and her lover could not come. It can be difficult for unmarried individuals to spend weekends and holidays alone. It is desirable to organize your life in such a way that it is quite full and bright, and the visits of a man complemented it.

How to behave with a married man, if you are a mistress

Ringed representatives of the stronger sex are in no hurry to change the reliable rear of the house for the apartment of mistresses . They are happy to find time for meetings, give attention, caresses, present pleasant surprises, but no more.

A lover can talk about his family, say that he is not appreciated and not understood at home, but he is not in a hurry to move in with his things, even if they call and wait for him.

Men are not inclined to take steps toward a new life when they are in love, unlike the weaker sex.

Dating a married man, you need to understand what he is looking for, what missing elements he is trying to fill, preferably:

  • be able to find converging factors, interests;
  • Have a similar outlook;
  • be friends, listen, understand, support;
  • not be shy to openly express positive emotions, feelings.
  • to preserve individuality.

With this approach, a couple builds a harmonious relationship, held together not only sex, but also mental unity.

How to behave with a lover, so he was afraid to lose you: psychology

To admirer does not relax, it is necessary to keep him in a light tone, but do not roll up to outright provocation of jealousy. He should understand that the girl’s life does not revolve around his person, it is rich and interesting. Do not show that the light in the window lights up only during his visits.

The woman is developing, learning something, reading, going to various events. Let him know about it. Just do not report that the exhibition was visited in the company of a handsome colleague: men are jealous, even when they have no moral rights.

The bad option is to hang on to him, pester him with calls, messages. Let the guy feel a constant light hunger for communication, but at the same time, don’t be afraid to show that his calls and visits bring joy.

It is useful to show your character from time to time, not agreeing to anything that goes against your personal desires and plans.

How to behave with a lover, so he himself was drawn to the woman

Representatives of the stronger sex like themselves most of all and when they love. The atmosphere of warmth, lightness, joy beckons them like a lantern moths.

That’s why they make girlfriends on the side. It is necessary to be different: calm, eccentric, quiet, submissive, capricious. Let him not know in advance which friend is waiting for him today. It is nice when the lady unobtrusively interested in the affairs, asking how was an important event, meeting. This shows not indifferent to his life, participation.

What should be the behavior in bed

As natural as possible. Two people find themselves in the same bed for mutual pleasure. A common mistake of women is to pretend to be a model on the podium: lying down like this, on the side the folds are not visible, etc. A normal adult man at this moment does not care about cellulite, the “wrong” curve of the hip, the length of the legs.

All these things he has considered before he has sex. Since it is happening and more than once, it means that all the physical data is quite satisfactory to him. Gradually it is worth studying the tastes of the chosen one, do not hesitate to talk about erotic topics, compare fantasies. Matching temperaments, the level of openness to new experiences – the basis of a harmonious long relationship.

How to seduce and fall in love with you so that he did not leave?

Seduction – a game of two, each must understand the rules, tactics and strategy. What he wants and what they want from him. A woman should be sexy: not vulgar, vulgar, bursting at the break, and the soft, mysterious, alluring.

Domestication – a long and painstaking process. It is necessary to cause a number of habits associated with the man’s passion. Do not immediately try to grasp the immensity.

Come into the life of a lover on soft feet, gradually expanding the range. Maneuvering between humility, adoration men and maintaining their own character, habits, personality, a wise girl will be irreplaceable.

How to tame and manipulate him?

To manipulate a man it is necessary to study his character, to understand the psychotype of personality, to get an idea of the reactions to events he gives, how they manifest themselves, how open, intense. Observation and intuition help in exploring the depths of a person’s personality.

Some situations that cannot be studied in natural conditions can be “modeled”, created artificially. This requires a subtle game: guys, of course, relax, lose vigilance in the presence of a pleasant young lady, but not all and not always.

You have to learn to notice the relationship between the words and the response to them, especially from the facial expressions, the body.

What to do if he went cold?

In any relationship there are setbacks. If it was noticeable that the lover is not so eager to date, snatching up every minute, you need to ask yourself whether you want to do something with this, to keep the connection or you can, in good conscience, let the situation drift away and do not regret it.

You don’t want to carry out resuscitation measures? Fine, leave on a good note, without a scandal, accusations, reproaches.

Value the relationship and ready to save them? Show unobtrusive care, generosity, tact. Perhaps the guy has a fault at work, health, family, and strength to “left” relationship does not remain. Offer help where you can really be helpful.

How to behave if you’re also married

Ladies get lovers for a variety of reasons: they may lack attention at home, sex, affectionate words, admiring eyes, compliments, warmth, attention.

Read more ► How to attract the attention of a married man, techniques from psychology: seducing and winning

Boredom comes last. When men are asked why they have an affair on the side, many answer that everything is generally good at home: the wife is smart and beautiful, the kids are cute, but there is no drive, it’s boring. The weaker sex often completes what they lack, falling into a dangerous delusion.

Once they get what they need from their “left” partner they fall in love with him so much that they are ready to send the whole world to hell and build a life with him. Wonderful, wonderful, subtle, gentle!

Forgetting that this is what he may be only in the role of a suitor. At home this is an ordinary husband, tired, preoccupied with problems, forgetting about the need for gentle words and regular kisses. Advice from psychologists: it is necessary to set priorities and not to fall into the captivity of illusions.

Do not:

  1. Ignore sex, spending time with your husband.
  2. Forget about contraception.
  3. Involve your girlfriends in the affair.
  4. Neglect measures to build an impeccable reputation.

A couple of married lovers is the best tandem: both outline a circle of rules that are strictly followed. With single admirers is more difficult: you need to instill in them the understanding that at night, in the evening there should be no calls, messages and other compromising moments.

The portrait of the ideal mistress.

The ideal is unattainable, but it is necessary to strive for it. Surveys among guys made it possible to compile an image of a lady that the vast majority would like to see as their mistress.

Impeccable appearance

A girl should be well-groomed from the ends of her hair to the heels. Soft skin without overt flaws, natural makeup, clean hair – something that is noted by all men.

Openness and looseness

The least of all potential lovers would like to play more and here in “guess what I was offended,” or “lure me into sex. There’s plenty of that kind of stuff at home.

Spontaneity of behavior (not to be confused with rude), initiative in bed, a willingness to bold experiments are welcome.

Battle Girlfriend

Mistress and friend in one person – it’s priceless. Young lady, who can share the passion of his chosen one, or at least try to understand what he found in it, instantly receives +1000 points to the karma.

Easy and joyful.

With a skilful approach a lady can play around with any trait of appearance or character, teaching it as a highlight. Except for the perpetually sad face.

The constant universal sorrow in the soul and on the face poisons the joy of communication. Few people want to be a perpetual mix of buffoon and psychoanalyst. More positive, pleasant emotions.

What men are afraid of in such a relationship

When entering into a relationship with a mistress, men are most afraid of the following moments:

  1. That his wife will find out about the fact of “cheating”.
  2. That the mistress will get pregnant.
  3. That the mistress will insist on leaving the family, remarriage

Most fears are in the zone that the love relationship will require some excessive effort, turning from a fun, but simple game that can be broken off at any time, into a problem that requires solutions, often difficult and unpleasant.

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