How to communicate with a girl: 14 tips
Men who know how to communicate with a girl do it easily and smoothly, as if from birth they are gifted with the skills to speak beautifully, as well as behave in the company of women naturally and at ease. What can I say, they are truly admirable. So what is their secret?
Why is it difficult to communicate with a girl?
Let’s consider two main reasons.
1. Past failures or lack of experience
Most men have never attended training on how to communicate with girls, and therefore, they are inexperienced in this area.
In addition, since many guys do not develop skills to communicate with women, some attempts made end up in painful rejection and a blow to self-esteem.
Past failures carry over into the present, and to avoid another repetition of painful experiences, many men stay away from the incessant stream of dating, flirting, and love.
2. Not knowing what to say to a girl.
Many guys think that when they approach a girl, they won’t have anything to say to her, or the conversation will quickly turn into a creepy, uncomfortable and awkward silence.
When you talk to a girl, you can’t rely on a prearranged script that goes beyond the first couple of words, because every conversation with the next girl will be different from the previous ones.
Instead of relying on stereotypical patterns, which still won’t be superfluous at first, you’re better off striving to develop the ability to respond creatively to any eventuality that may arise in the process of talking to a girl.
For some guys, this approach will seem intimidating. But in fact, communicating with a girl is the most natural thing that should exist in the world, it’s just that men get too caught up in their perfectionism in trying to “talk their best.”
How to communicate with a girl.
1. Appearance matters.
Communicating with a girl involves invading her personal space, while taking on more significance than the words you normally play out during a conversation.
Even before she hears what you say to her, she will evaluate your appearance, which will play an important role in your success or failure, even if not the main one.
So to communicate with your girlfriend more effectively, have a neat and presentable appearance.
2. Pay attention to your clothes.
Step into the role of the salesman and try to catch his train of thought. If you decide to “sell yourself,” at the very least you should take care of a good package.
That doesn’t mean you have to dress like a Hollywood star shimmering on the cover of a glossy magazine (although, why not), or necessarily buy expensive clothes before you talk to a girl.
Just dress appropriately so you don’t look like you just got out of bed.
3. Approach to the girl
When it comes to meeting a girl, for example on the street, it’s best if you approach the girl from the front, at least so that she sees you before you approach her.
Don’t forget that usually shady characters sneak up on you from behind.
But still keep in mind that this is not dogma.
4. Body Language
Body language can have both positive and negative effects on communicating with a girl.
At the very least, you should appear calm and relaxed. Keep your posture and head straight.
You should not shake with excitement, look hunched over, or look at the asphalt under your feet.
Don’t forget that a smile can disarm the most hostile of interlocutors.
When you smile, people feel less wary, and it helps a lot to communicate with a girl.
You position yourself as a friendly person who wants no harm.
In addition, a smile makes your appearance more appealing.
6. Eye Contact
Eye contact is a sign of respect, confidence, sincerity and openness.
When you talk to a girl, always look into her eyes.
But you should not pierce the girl with a stiff unblinking look, as if you are a hunter who has tracked down his prey. Your gaze should be soft and relaxed.
7. Use hand gestures
Using hand gestures helps you appear to be a more confident and open conversationalist.
Hand gestures emphasize your point of view, imbue your words with emotional coloring, and create an atmosphere of calm and confidence.
8. Consider the girl’s personal space
Our impact on another person’s personal space is often an aspect we don’t give proper consideration to.
In this context, overexposure can have a negative result because girls are highly sensitive to their personal space.
If you are talking to a girl for the first time and are a stranger to her, stay a comfortable distance of about two steps away from her.
In this way the girl will feel comfortable, your voice will sound at a normal volume, and you will be able to see the facial expression of the interlocutor perfectly.
9. Voice volume
Talking too loudly to a girl gives her the impression that either you have a problem with your hearing, that you are too talkative or that there is something wrong with your head.
Talking to her in a soft and quiet voice can make you sound like an insecure person and a mumble.
Speak loudly enough, without going overboard, but so that the girl doesn’t have to listen to what you have to say.
10. How to Talk to a Girl
When it comes to how to communicate with a girl, your manner of speaking will be one of the most important indicators of effective communication.
For best results, keep your communication neutral, friendly and confident.
When communicating with a girl, be polite and well-mannered. Foul language should not be used as a bundle of words.
Many girls pay attention to the manners of men.
You don’t want to make a bad impression.
A compliment to the girl is not a bad addition to the communication, if the contact is established and the conversation is evolving.
Start by complimenting her hair, makeup, clothes and, of course, her intelligence.
Girls love compliments, so it’s a sin not to use them, just do not overdo it. Do not show the interlocutor that you have a crush on her, it’s not good.
12. Ask her questions.
Ask the girl about her hobbies, find out where she bought that beautiful bag, ask her about the book she’s reading or the music she’s listening to.
Keep in mind that you shouldn’t turn communication into an interrogation, so dilute the questions you ask the girl with your comments and personal stories.
13. Use humor
Women like men with a good sense of humor more than they like good-looking guys.
If banter is your thing, be sure to show off your skills.
Avoid vulgar jokes, as they are totally inappropriate for a conversation with a man you have just met.
But if the joke is really cool, then.
14. End the conversation at the right moment
Just as guests are not advised to stay with their hosts for a week, you should sense the moment when you need to leave the person you’re talking to.
If the conversation begins to have long pauses filled with silence, you should make a graceful exit from the communication.
End the conversation at the peak of the conversation, ie at a time when the girl shows genuine interest – a good way to tell the interlocutor that you have to run some business, and say goodbye to the girl.
If you don’t know how to communicate with a girl, the first conversation may put you through a state of excitement, but some preparation and, most importantly, practice will allow you to become an expert communicator.
Don’t be silent: 17 great conversation topics with a girl that will help you get to know each other
To avoid getting nervous on a first date, think ahead about what you can talk about with a girl you like.
Here and below photos unsplash.com; pexels.com
On that first, fifth or even hundredth date, when the awkward pause drags on, you have in your head the question of what to say to a girl and what to talk to her about.
Knowing how to casually bring up topics of conversation is the key to building a happy relationship. After all, how are you going to get to know each other on a deeper level?
While everyone has different tastes, of course, the following are interesting conversation topics to talk to a girl that are hard to go wrong with. Use them to start a conversation and then let it develop naturally.
What to talk to a girl about: the 6 best topics
So, let’s start, perhaps, with a golden selection of classic topics that can be discussed for hours.
1. Culture and everything related to it.
Most of us instinctively choose this topic for conversation at the very beginning of acquaintance, and for good reason: it’s always interesting to find out what your girlfriend likes. Whether it’s her favorite movies, music bands, or a book she’s recently read. Be sure to ask about the tastes of the girl you’re talking to!
The main thing to remember is that a mismatch of some of your passions shouldn’t be cause for an argument – we’re all different, just like our preferences. Instead of categorically asserting that your interests are much “cooler,” try to learn more about what she likes and why – it’s possible that upon closer acquaintance with the world of her hobbies you’ll discover something new and even like some unexpected direction in music, movies or other genre of art.
2. Hobbies and hobbies
Just as we can talk endlessly about our favorite franchises or authors, hobbies are another win-win topic. Wondering what a girl likes to do in her spare time?
Is she passionate about a particular sport, does she prefer to spend her weekends at home or visiting certain places? Or maybe she does volunteer work or loves to make things? Don’t limit the discussion of this topic to her passions, and don’t forget to tell us about yours.
By the way, give a tip, what unusual hobbies do girls like? Read about them in a separate piece.
This topic may seem boring and hackneyed to you, but believe me, it works. And you can discuss not only the weather conditions that you encountered during the date, but also talk about your preferences in principle.
Find out from her what she likes better: cozying up in a chair when there’s inclement weather outside, or basking in the warm sun? Does she wait every year for spring to come, or maybe she loves winter and is sad when it’s over because she’s snowboarding? Talking about the weather can take you anywhere, and that’s what makes it good. Any response from your date can be discussed and something to add from yourself.
4. experience (yours or hers).
We’ve all accumulated a pretty impressive baggage of experience over the years, and you can always talk about it. Where have you studied, lived, worked, and vacationed? Tell each other the strangest and most unusual stories from your past.
After you open the “memory box”, you both are carried on the waves of memory, and the conversation not only becomes more personal and profound, but it will flow by itself.
5. Goals and aspirations
Just as it can be fascinating to discuss the past, conversations about the future are often even more exciting. Ask about the girl’s plans, dreams, and ideas about what she’d like to accomplish.
Just please don’t use the hackneyed phrase “where do you see yourself in five years” – not only does it make you feel like you’re in a job interview, but it often puts you on the spot.
There’s a pretty high chance that the girl you’re chatting with has (or had in the past) some sort of pet. And, as a rule, pet owners love to tell funny stories about their pets, as well as discuss their cute habits. Check it out – it’s hard to miss this topic.
Conversation topics with a pen pal girl to keep the conversation going: 3 options
Alas, there is no universal formula for exactly how you should build a dialogue with a girl. In most cases, you need to respond to what she tells you and share the facts that you want.
However, if you’ve come to a natural conclusion to the topic at hand during your correspondence, and you want to resume the dialogue, here’s how you can do it.
7. Talk about your day.
Although for most of us, every new day is much like the previous day, there are still usually some small but fun incidents that can be discussed.
Did you watch a few episodes of a new show, try an unusual kind of coffee, see an unusual life-size puppet outside the store, or see a funny announcement at the bus stop? Tell her about it and complete the story with a photo if possible.
But don’t get hung up solely on your news and don’t forget to take interest in how her day is going. Even what the girl ate for lunch can be a topic of conversation.
8. Tell her about yourself.
Sure, you shouldn’t talk about yourself all the time, but it’s a great “go-to” topic that you can always use when you don’t know what else to talk about. First, you’re sure to have a lot of interesting stories, and second, it’s easier to talk about yourself than any other topic.
Most importantly, don’t forget about proportion and don’t turn your correspondence into a monologue about your virtues.
9. Talk about her.
The truth is that people like to talk about themselves. Encourage this desire in your companion and show sincere interest. If you ask questions that help her get to know you better, she’ll feel more comfortable talking to you and become more open.
But again we remind you of the golden mean: don’t turn your correspondence into a tedious interrogation and avoid too personal topics so as not to embarrass the girl.
3 cute topics to talk to a girl on the phone
So, you’ve moved on from messenger correspondence to talking on the phone or on audio calls. Great! Surely at this point you want to say something nice to her, but without “overdoing it.” How do you do that? Now we’ll tell you.
11. Compliment her.
It’s great if it’s not something corny like “you’re so pretty. Try to highlight some cool and unique feature in the girl that you really like and is not related to her appearance.
Maybe you like some trait of her character? Her courage or sense of humor? Or is she the most well-read person you’ve ever met? Whatever it is, make sure your compliment is sincere. You can read more about the craftsmanship of compliments in a separate piece.
12. discuss your plans
If you’re both thinking about meeting in real life, now is a good time to discuss it. Try to find out what kind of vacation she likes the most, are there any places in your city that she has not been, but wants to visit, and based on these answers, plan your ideal first date.
13. Admit that you like her.
Feel free to say something really nice if it fits into your dialogue and you feel it’s time to say it. Admit that you really enjoy hanging out with her. Tell her that you always enjoy her company and want to get to know her better.
It’s a bold move, but it’s worth it. Let her know you appreciate her. Just, please, no vulgar innuendos.
5 topics worth discussing on a first date.
Here comes that exciting moment of your first meeting! As you can easily guess, it needs to be thoroughly prepared.
And that means not only picking the right outfit and choosing a place to meet, but also putting “up your sleeve” a few topics to discuss so that you won’t encounter awkward silence.
14. Pay attention to your surroundings
Whether you’re walking in the park, sitting in a coffee shop, or going to a concert, there will likely be something around you to talk about. Whether it’s your favorite snacks, the songs of the band you’re listening to, or a secret passion for feeding pigeons in the park, you should just look around and there’s a bunch of interesting topics in front of you.
15. Talk about your work or studies (but in moderation)
Classic. Ask the girl what she’s done in the past, what she’s doing now, and what projects she dreams of doing in the future. Also, share your experiences.
But do not turn your date into a two-hour lecture about the specifics of your profession, and do not throw incomprehensible terms at her – so you’re likely to make her bored, rather than make a lasting impression.
16. Share a funny story.
A sure-fire option, especially if the story is “on topic” and will make her smile. Think ahead about what it could be, and make sure there are no elements in the story that will make either of you feel uncomfortable.
Hint: A story that starts with the phrase, “I remember one time my friends and I got so drunk. ” might not be the best choice.
17. Discuss your past or future travels
Many people love to travel and during the wanderings get a lot of vivid impressions that love to share with others. Ask the girl where she has been before and what places she would like to visit.