How does a man hide his feelings and falling in love?

How to identify a man in love if he is hiding his feelings

Love – a wonderful feeling, especially if it is mutual. But women often find it difficult to determine whether they are really interested in a man, although at some level are already guessing about it. And this kind of difficulties are quite understandable, because not all men are different openness and are able to show their sympathy to try if not to win, then at least to accommodate a woman that he likes. And some guys even put a lot of effort to hide the resulting “chemistry” with the object of interest.

Women, on the contrary, it is always important to know how men relate to them, especially if you want to find a long-awaited suitor. However, to understand that a man in love, but hides his feelings and therefore does not dare to take the first step to develop a relationship, it is not difficult. If we consider his behavior and actions in more detail, you can unmistakably understand whether these very feelings and how strong they are.

Why a man does not show his feelings, when they are there

Usually women are perplexed as to why a man does nothing if he really likes a girl. Oddly enough, most guys just do not realize how important it is for women to feel interesting, desired and loved. And not only that: sometimes it is even more important to realize in time that you love, but just hide it, because the signs that girls begin to guess the presence of incipient attraction, most often are non-verbal.

This can be as awkward compliments and nice gifts, as well as innocent touching, hugs like “casually”, short kisses, more like smacking, and more. If such signs of attention is not, women begin to doubt the effectiveness of their charms and, consequently, there is jealousy, irritability, resentment. So why is a man hides his love from the one for whom he certainly suffers?

As stated by psychoanalysts, the cause of male “secrecy” can be anything, but only a dozen of them are typical of most cases:

  1. Perhaps your shy suitor is simply afraid of being rejected, misunderstood or ridiculed? For these people are always critical factor reciprocity – that is, that a woman is not just shared their feelings, but also wished for their manifestations.
  2. Often men hide their feelings because of adherence to social or cultural stereotypes. One of them concerns the image of a man-warrior, who must in any situation behave restrained, balanced and carefully hide provoking the weakness of emotions. It is only ladies can afford all sorts of sentimental things, but men are written to remain cold-blooded and unwavering.
  3. It happens that a grown man is sincerely in love, but he hides his feelings in order to preserve his independence. He thinks that if he reveals his relationship to a woman, he will become vulnerable and easily manipulated. Since any man seeks to maintain authority in his own environment, most often almost all attempts at tenderness/sentimentality/attention are immediately suppressed.
  4. Another popular stereotype in the vein of “the less a woman we love…”, which guys are readily quoted by their benevolent “colleagues” at every opportunity, has an enviable vitality. Isn’t it this banal paradox that leads men to hide their feelings, fearing that when the object of desire learns of the seriousness of their relationship, they will certainly lose interest in them. Therefore, guys try to act aloof so as not to lose their position in the location of their chosen one.
  5. If a guy is in love, but hides his feelings, he may be doing so because of a recent painful breakup. After such experiences, many men do not dare to take another risk to start a relationship. They try to get to know their future partner as well as possible before they open their heart to her or propose dating.
  6. Sometimes a man may hide his feelings simply because he is married or already romantically involved with another girl. And it is natural that the sympathy for the woman he likes will try to keep a secret (and not only from her, but also from his entourage). It’s not so easy – to give up your comfort zone, to give up a more or less established way of life and, diving in with his head to start building a new model.
  7. Often a man stubbornly ignores a woman he liked, because of the basic insecurity. Such people, as a rule, have been single for a long time, when a chance to change something, they get lost and find a way out by putting off making an important decision for later.
  8. In some cases it is really problematic for women to realize that a man is in love, because he hides his sympathy too diligently. The reason here is really delicate – a big age difference. Usually when a man is much older than the lady of his heart, it provokes him to develop a kind of psychological block, and restraining his love, and attempts to admit it. Out of fear of being rejected, such a man can deceive even himself.
  9. Sometimes the reluctance to show women signs of attention may act as a kind of defensive reaction. All men, contrary to classic stereotypes, at heart are vulnerable teenagers, extremely sensitive in their relationships. Therefore, any frankness in matters of love is often regarded as a voluntary surrender. Restraint and silence are a way of protecting the bleeding heart in love.
  10. It is clear that when a man is in love, he experiences virtually the same things as a woman. However, as you can see, the difference in the perception of feelings is still significant. Today, the image of a real man is traditionally associated with such character traits as emphasized masculinity and even rudeness. It is not surprising that the representatives of the stronger sex are so exaggerated desire to conform to this image at all costs. And this, in turn, forces them to consider falling in love as a weakness. They believe that if they are too conspicuous to show their attitude toward the chosen one, then in the society of more brutal “fellow men’s club” they will be treated with indulgence, because they will consider them “uncool” or unremarkable weaklings.

In fact, there is nothing new for women in these reasons, except the need to correct their philosophy, which is based on the dogma that men have a natural urge to conquer women. Not all “men” are hunters, and not all of them only see women as prey, the victory over which is the ultimate goal of love affairs.

How to tell if a guy is in love

No matter how carefully a man veils his feelings, they still can be recognized by his behavior. Just one look of a man in love will tell you more than a million words! And when a man is near the object of his interest, he just can not keep a mask of equanimity – willy-nilly he begins to show excitement and tries to obtain favor from the one to whom he has already given his heart.

There are practically infallible signs that the guy is in love, but he hides it for some reason. A woman need only show a little observation, and she will easily recognize that she is not indifferent to the potential suitor:

  • A man tormented by romantic feelings is ready to do everything to please his chosen one. For the sake of purity of the experiment just ask him for something, and you watch his reaction. And if your shy admirer will try to do everything possible to solve your problem, you will not have any difficulty understanding that he really is in love, and the cause of his suffering – you yourself;
  • Being in the company of beloved, men are usually nervous, so often behave inadequately, illogical or quite stupid. They are beginning to talk all sorts of platitudes, laugh out of place, inappropriate jokes. They need to understand, because when a person is in love, but hides true feelings, it’s not without stress. And this is understandable, because in the soul of a man in love there is always an ocean of passions;
  • To determine whether a guy is in love with you, think back to all of your conversations. If he told you about his homeland, his relatives, what he does in the evenings, it means that you are becoming a close person to him and he is trying to make you part of his life;
  • When men fall in love, they listen very carefully to the girl they are attracted to. At the same time, they really hear her, trying to understand her problems, experiences, life plans;
  • Trying to please the object of his admiration, men are beginning to look after themselves more carefully. They buy new clothes, hairstyles, perfume and so on;
  • When a man has a lover, it causes him to want to protect her and to care, even if he hides his true feelings. He tries to help her in any, however insignificant, situations, from carrying shopping bags to help in various household chores;
  • When a man’s heart begins to “swarm butterflies,” the lover thinks about plans for the future, about a stable income, about what he can do so that his family will not need anything;
  • A man who has romantic feelings tries to meet his beloved as often as possible, calling her, texting or messaging her on social networks.

But one of the surest signs that a guy is in love and hides his emotions, lies in a rather atypical behavior for modern men. Because lovers are afraid of somehow offend their girlfriend, they apologize for the slightest misstep, but are wildly jealous of other members of the stronger sex. Moreover, for the sake of his beloved man can even give up bad habits, join the gym to improve physical fitness, increasingly often says not “I” and “we.

Gestures and facial expressions of a man in love

Man in love shows not only in his actions, but even in facial expressions and gestures. It is worth a short time to observe a man when he is alone with his beloved to understand his condition. In particular, pay attention:

  • On his body, which is almost constantly in some tension, and from time to time he assumes a posture that causes him a certain stiffness;
  • Sometimes there may also be trembling in the hands, caused by extreme agitation, overexcitement or embarrassment;
  • Often the palms of the hands become excessively dry or sweaty;
  • In situations where he feels insecure or tries to close himself off, he crosses his arms over his chest;
  • If he tries to show himself to his beloved in all his glory, he straightens his shoulders and raises his hands to his waist (this is his way of attracting her attention);
  • Lovers who secretly desire their date often casually touch their belt or keep their hands on their hips;
  • during a conversation, the young man experiencing feelings tries to shorten the distance as much as possible to be in the personal space of his beloved.

For men, falling in love is primarily an uncontrollable burst of adrenaline. And since any excited state is almost impossible to hide, no man, even if he was a super agent, is not able to neutralize his emotions at the sight of his beloved. So women who have basic skills of observation, it will be quite easy to recognize the signs of love in a man. Especially since many guys do not even know how quickly they give away their facial expressions, which inevitably change in love:

  • when a guy meets or is near the object of his adoration, he literally changes in the face (at the same time, the face can both blush and pale);
  • People in love often look down, but their eyebrows are slightly raised up at this time;
  • Romantic feelings are always positive emotions, that is why a smile often wanders on the face of a person in love, be it modest and barely visible or maximum open (as they say, “in 32 teeth”);
  • A young man in love often unwittingly shares all the experiences of his lady of the heart – if she laughs or is sad, he immediately picks up her emotions, although he does not notice it;
  • A loving person tries not to miss a single change in the behavior of the beloved, makes every effort to support the initiative.

The desire for tactile contact can also be attributed to the manifestation of strong sympathy. The man tries to touch the object of his interest at every opportunity, and the touch can be friendly and does not imply anything intimate – for example, a casual touch of the face or hand, removal of hair or dust from clothes, and so on.

The woman may not even know how important such touches are to the lover. It is as if he is touching the body of his beloved, with the young man’s eyes lingering on the lips of his beloved. In this case, the touch is a kind of completion of non-verbal contact, which brings a man soothing and even great pleasure.

Manifestations of love in men on the zodiac signs

All people have different characters, so in love, they behave differently. Under the influence of romantic feelings in different ways are manifested and features of the person’s character and his ability to express his emotions. No less important is the correspondence to the characteristics of their zodiac sign, because of the date of birth to a large extent depend on the behavior patterns of people. Therefore, when determining a man’s feelings, it would be logical to take into account the “star” influence:

10 signs that a man is in love, but hides his feelings

Has it ever happened to you that a man showed signs of attention, but did it not so obviously that you can understand his attitude? Here it seems like he makes some hints and you get the impression that he likes you (and maybe a little more than just likes you), but nothing further develops. Next, we’ll look at the signs that a man is in love, but is hiding it.

How to understand the behavior of a man in love

What signs of a man in love can we remember? He gives bouquets of roses, actively invites you on a date, he writes love letters, arranging a romantic evening with candles somewhere on the terrace of a cafe. All this we have seen more than once in romantic movies, but in real life is different. Few men in love will have the courage to directly invite the girl he likes for a romantic date.

In the first phase of the relationship, when sympathy between you just beginning to emerge, the fear of rejection is too great. Therefore, often a man and did not dare to take the first step, and the relationship did not develop. What to do in this case? Establish a friendly communication, reciprocate, if you see the following signs in the behavior of the man.

Man in love – hidden signs

Take a closer look at the behavior of a young man. If you see one or more signs of indifference, there is a high probability that he likes you.

Staring at you.

This is one of the first signs that a man is interested in you. If a woman is sympathetic or he is in love, a man literally does not take his eyes off her. Even if she is standing on the opposite side of the room, a man will look for his beloved.

Whenever you look at him, you catch his gaze turned to you. It is often accompanied by a soft smile or just a good mood of a man. After all, if he sees the woman he loves, his mood improves, there are positive emotions.

Man looks you in the eye.

This is also a clear sign of falling in love or a strong liking. During a conversation he looks you in the eyes with a long gaze, like in a child’s game “who will review whom”.

The long look in your eyes is a sign of falling in love.

As an adult, it means he doesn’t mind getting closer to a woman and starting a relationship. It’s a way of telling his liking without words.

Sense of humor.

In the presence of a woman he likes, the man jokes a lot because he is trying to impress her. And his jokes don’t hurt you or anyone around him. You do not feel hurt or embarrassed. On the contrary, your mood improves.

The man will watch your reaction as well. When he says something, he will certainly look at you to see if you like his joke.

The important point is that a man in love may make awkward or hurtful jokes, including those directed at you, while under the influence of his emotions. This happens if he has low self-esteem or lacks self-confidence. Perhaps it will pass when your communication becomes more frequent and he stops being afraid of rejection. So in any case, it is worth paying attention to this sign.

Touching .

A man in love will undoubtedly try to touch his beloved. It is as if by chance he will touch your hand, your shoulder, your elbow. For example, passing by or passing something. The lover’s touch is unobtrusive, light, as if accidental.

A man deliberately touches a woman he likes to shorten the distance and understand by her reaction how much she likes him.

And if you still have doubts about his liking, look on the bright side – after all, a man is unlikely to touch a woman he is completely indifferent to.

An important point – a man’s touch should cause you only positive feelings. If you do not like it – then this is not your man and do not continue the relationship.

Seeks your company

If a man is secretly in love, but hides his feelings, it is unlikely he will ask you out. However, it will almost always be present where there is you. For example, if it is your colleague and you go to a refresher course, he will also go there. If you are into ballroom dancing, parachuting, going to the fitness room, he may also sign up for the same section or workout.

He wants to know more about you.

To do this, he listens carefully to what you are saying and asks clarifying questions. For example, in his presence you said that you were tired last weekend. A man in love will ask – why, what happened, what you did this weekend. An indifferent man will simply let this information pass his ears.

If you are already more or less in touch with this man, he may ask you himself – how was the weekend. He can also ask you questions about your hobbies, what you like and do not like, what specialty you got in college, why you chose this place of work, and so on. All of this shows that he is interested in you.

He wants to impress you.

A man in love is trying to show his best side. He may talk about his achievements, his successful projects, the fact that he has been promoted at work, that he is striving for more and so on. He may talk about how well he has done a task, even though the situation does not require it. He says all of this in your presence so that you understand how good he is.

Writing messages.

Note that this does not apply to all men, but only to those who are secretly in love and yet active. He may start on his own initiative to communicate with you in social networks, instant messengers, texting and so on. But if a man shows signs of falling in love, and he does not even add you to his friends on social networks, do not write messages – do not rush to get upset, perhaps you are not too close to communicate, and he will start doing this in the future.

Man seeks to communicate with a woman not only in real life, but also on the Internet

But if he is already doing it – this means that sympathy for you is definitely there. After all, wasting time writing messages uninteresting to him a woman he is unlikely to.

Helps you

A man in love will always try to help a woman who is interesting to him. If you are in the same room at work and you are hot – he will turn on the air conditioner to make you more comfortable (and will do so even without your request). If you can’t cope with any work task – he will offer his help in solving it.

If you say a program on your computer isn’t working – he’ll be sure to ask what it is and help you reinstall it.

If you doubt whether the man is in love with you or not, ask him for something. The request should not be too onerous and easy to do. For example, give you a ride somewhere, fix the computer, and so on. In love with the man immediately respond and happy to help you. If he crumples, stalling, trying to avoid help – then he certainly does not have feelings for you.

Watch your style.

This is another sign that a man has romantic feelings. If you notice that the man dressed better, his style has become more thoughtful, the clothes are matched in color, there are fashionable accessories (bag, scarf or neckerchief, belt, watch, sunglasses) – this means that he wants to look better in the eyes of a woman he likes.

If a man suddenly began to dress stylishly – this is a clear sign of falling in love.

By the way, a man in love often begins to use a good perfume, even if prior to that he did not have a weakness for new products perfumes. This is also quite a clear sign of the presence of romantic feelings.

Of course, this is not a guarantee that he is in love with you. However, a good appearance is a clear sign of falling in love with someone.

What not to pay attention to

Often at the beginning of a relationship (or even at the preparatory stage, when there is no relationship yet, but there are some romantic “sparks” between a man and his lover) women expect obvious and romantic actions from a man to understand that he is in love. For example:

  • An invitation to a restaurant,
  • A handful of roses on her birthday,
  • calls on and off the phone,
  • Many manifestations of initiative on the part of men,
  • Attempts to be constantly near her,
  • active communication on the Internet, constant texting,

and so on. Alas, we have to disappoint you. If the initial stage of your communication with a man is all of the above, it is a “professional” seducer or pick-up artist. It’s all part of his strategy to win as many groupies as possible.

How to understand it? Very simple – all these actions lead to nothing. After a date, he disappears, does not call or write, and then reappears with a gorgeous bouquet. Then disappears again – and so on ad infinitum, until he finds a new object for the sighs.

In addition, in this case, you intuitively feel that something is wrong. Relationships do not become deeper and more trusting. His actions are superficial, and resemble more of a nerve game than an attempt to build a real relationship.

The above actions – armfuls of roses, invitations to the restaurant, calls, and so on – are typical for men with whom you already have a stable and long-standing romantic relationships, as well as for husbands. But if you are just coming up to start a romantic relationship with a man you like – he is unlikely to show it.

Why do men hide their feelings for women?

A lot of women wonder why a man should hide his feelings of love. Why does a woman need to guess at the signals in his behavior, how much he cares about her? Would not it be easier for a man to just say how he feels, to ask him out on a date, to show clear initiative, rather than hints?

There are several reasons for this.

Fear of getting into an awkward situation

Falling in love is a kind of stress for both men and women, because a person begins to experience strong emotions that are not typical for normal life. And these feelings do not always help to think straight. People in love do all sorts of stupid things, so it is understandable why a man holds back his feelings and their manifestation at the level of actions.

The risk of rejection

If a man is not sure of a woman’s reciprocal feelings, it will be painful for his ego to get rejected. Therefore, he only looks closely to the one that interested him, but direct initiative is not shown.

The influence of the environment.

Suppose you communicate in a company. And it is customary to be ironic about expressions of affection. For example, as soon as a man holds the door or pulls up a chair, he hears something like “tili-tili dough, the bride and groom,” or “are you in love or what?” The same thing can happen in a team at school or work.

The main point is that any display of sympathy is perceived by others ironically or critically – and this will naturally be unpleasant for the man. In the end, he may even stop to show himself in any way in relation to you. So my advice is this – change the environment, find a way to communicate with this man alone or in other, more friendly, company.

Plays games.

Some men think that if he won’t talk directly about his feelings, it will intrigue the woman and she herself will start to “run” for it. He may show signs of sympathy (joking, smiling, occasionally trying to touch your arm) and then suddenly become more reserved and indifferent. Then he shows sympathy again, and so on.

There are three possibilities here:

1. he does it unconsciously, by virtue of his feelings, which either completely overwhelm him or recede;

2. he does it deliberately, to tease the woman he likes a little and show that he, too, is not so simple. But he does it with good intentions, and usually this “game” does not last long, because the man is still protecting the feelings of the woman he is in love with, and does not want her to doubt his behavior for too long;

3. he does it intentionally, but for the purpose of using pickup strategies. This is the most negative case, because in this way, with the help of “closer-more” behavior, the man believes that the woman herself will begin to show initiative, to call for dates, and will constantly think that he loves her, but is “shy” to show normal initiative himself.

Such a guy does not think about the woman’s feelings, it is important for him to “fall in love” with as many admirers as possible, without developing the relationship further. In this case, you should not consider such a man as an option for a relationship. It is better to immediately turn your attention to another, more serious young man.


In their youth, many men are quite shy in matters of relationships, and they are unlikely to talk directly about their feelings. So here you can try to do the following. If you notice one or more signs of sympathy or crush guy named above, try to communicate with him more.

Communicate in a friendly way, without romantic overtones. The more communication there is between you, the more chances a man has to understand that the girl treats him positively.

But if after that the man continues to behave “closer or farther,” it’s not worth wasting time waiting for romantic proposals.

Lack of crush

Yes, yes, this is one of the reasons why a man doesn’t take the initiative and doesn’t move into action. He may look at you, smile at you, even chat nicely when he meets you, but he’s not really in love and he’s not planning a long-term relationship with you. That is why everything is limited to smiles and looks, and no real action on his part.

Do not waste time on an imaginary sympathy

Advice – if this has been happening for a long time (several months or more), do not waste time on a fictitious relationship. Find someone who will gladly ask you out and won’t boggle your mind with incomprehensible behavioral signals.


We have considered the main signs of men in love, how to understand by his behavior that he is in love with a woman, but hides his feelings. We also learned about why men prefer to hide their sympathy and not talk about it directly. We hope that this will help you understand your relationship and how a man really feels about you.

And remember that it is enough to make just a small step forward to start a beautiful romance. Or vice versa – just in time to realize that this is not your man, and do not waste time on communication without prospects.

By the way, if you think about whether to take the initiative in a relationship with a man, we advise to read the article How to take the initiative in a relationship with a man, as well as article Initiative in a relationship with a man – whether it is necessary to show?

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