How to know if you’re in love with someone
Contributor(s): Maria Avgitidis. Maria Avgitidis is the executive director and matchmaker at Agape Match, a dating service in New York City. As a fourth-generation matchmaker, she has successfully combined her family’s tradition with modern relationship psychology and matchmaking technology to help clients meet their other half for over 10 years. Maria and Agape Match have been written about in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice and Thrillist.
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Falling in love can be an exhilarating yet intimidating experience. Sometimes it can be hard to know if you are in love with someone or not. Keep reading to determine whether or not you are in love with someone.
Find out what falling in love is. According to Urban Dictionary, a crush is “a burning desire to be with someone you find very attractive or special.” [1] X Source of Information Falling in love drives people to experience incredible emotions-for example, you may feel both terribly shy and impossibly giddy. You can’t choose who you fall in love with, but you can decide how to behave when you find out you’ve fallen in love.
- Friendly crush : It is important to remember that not all strong feelings are romantic. Allowing yourself to completely trust someone and become very close to someone without having any romantic feelings for that person is truly special. If you want to be with that person all the time, it means that you are no longer just friends, but best friends. Being in love with a friend is perfectly normal; you should want to spend as much time as possible with your best friend.
- Admired crush : When you idealize a person (a celebrity, a teacher, or a classmate who has done something very cool), you may realize that you have very strong feelings about that person or their merits. Feeling in awe in the presence of someone who has done something amazing or can teach you wonderful things is absolutely normal. Usually, after spending a lot of time with that person and learning a lot from them, you can feel on par with them. You may find that your crush goes away when the initial excitement of this person’s presence in your life wanes.
- A fleeting crush : Among humans, attraction to other people is a natural instinct. Even if you are in a great relationship with someone, you may feel attracted to someone other than your romantic partner. This attraction is what’s called a passing crush-this new person seems new and interesting to you (they probably are), but that doesn’t mean you should completely reconsider your current relationship or, if you’re not in a relationship, should drop everything to be with them. Transient crushes usually begin because of a person’s outward attractiveness.
- Romantic crush : Sometimes if you have a romantic crush on someone, it means that you really like that person (in a romantic sense). If you are romantically in love with someone, it means that you want to be with that person more than friends – you want to be your date’s girlfriend or boyfriend. If you’re thinking about kissing, cuddling, and taking romantic walks by the hand with this person, then you’re probably experiencing a romantic crush.
Determine how serious your crush is. By figuring this out, you can decide how best to behave – whether you should reveal your feelings or not. The following sections of this article will help you figure out how serious your crush is.
How to know if you’re in love with a girl: 13 signs of butterflies in your stomach
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The expert – Margarita Lopukhova
Family psychologist. For 8 years I save “family units” from collapse. I help couples regain love and understanding.
Love – the meaning of human life, love – the most beautiful feeling in the world … At least, so they say from the TV screens, because in the modern world love – and a reliable way to sell something. But how do you know if you’re in love, if you’re poisoned, or if you accidentally took the wrong pill?
13 signs of falling in love: I’m not an addict, I’m a romantic!
Okay, now seriously. Look, here’s the thing: there’s really a lot of hype wrapped around love. Everyone says it’s something incredible and astounding. Love has become synonymous with happiness.
That’s why sometimes it’s hard to know how you feel. Often people don’t experience such strong, vivid, dramatic emotions as they do in the movies. There are times when love is just a desire to be around and feeling warm next to a person, but no kisses against the backdrop of a sunset and a sinking Titanic.
The second reason is that you may deny your feelings. Why? For example, you may be afraid of rejection. Or subconsciously consider love, attachment to someone as a weakness, and to be weak, to be vulnerable – it’s scary.
The third reason: men in general are not taught to understand their emotions. Since childhood, girls are taught to understand the intricacies of human relationships, to be sensitive and attentive. Meanwhile, boys are told “do not cry, you’re a man!” That is, forbidden to cry, forbidden to feel! Well, how are you supposed to understand your feelings after that?
Well, get behind the wheel of the mental excavator, start digging inside yourself.
- The most obvious sign: euphoria. Just yesterday everything was pissing you off, and now the whole world seems beautiful and wonderful, and even the unshaven janitor looks friendlier… Okay, if you’re not kidding, euphoria can be expressed in much milder terms. The essence in one: unreasonably good mood, lightness and desire to see in everything good.
- And even other people, especially those close to you, notice that you are all glowing, smiling more often, being in a joyful mood more often. Relatives are often more sensitive and attentive to people than they are. So if your mother is smiling understandingly at you and your father is teasing you: “Did you remember the condoms?” they may have just figured it out before you did.
- You’re worried about your appearance. Maybe you’re shaving more carefully, being more thoughtful about your clothing choices? Do you want to buy a new perfume or finally join a gym? If you’re lucky and your date also fell in love with you, now she’s doing the same thing: You both want to impress each other.
- You think about her a lot. Not necessarily around the clock, but several times a day your thoughts steadily return to her. Where is she? What is she doing? Would she like this movie? When will I see her next time? And the last time we met she said she was reading Bradbury, you should read it too… Even if you’re busy or in pleasant company.
- You genuinely care about her problems. You genuinely want to understand why she’s in a bad mood or happy about how her day went. You care, you want to cheer her up, you want to help her, you willingly get involved in her problems and perhaps take them as your own.
- For the sake of meeting her you are ready to change your plans, to get up early, even though you have been an owl all your life, to sacrifice a day off to help her, and all this is absolutely disinterested just because you like spending time with her and want to help her.
- You want to introduce her to people you care about. For example, with a group of friends, with her parents, with anyone whose opinion is important to you. You worry about whether they’ll like each other. Why? Because subconsciously you already understand that this girl is important to you, that she is with you for a long time. Now you’re unconsciously trying to dock the meaningful parts of your life so you don’t lose anything. After all, this is one of the most global relationship conflicts – when you have to choose between your girlfriend and your friends or, Cthulhu forbid, your girlfriend and your parents. You may not realize this desire, though, but trust me: you’re asking your mom for the thirtieth time if she likes blondes about 170 centimeters tall as a physics teacher, not without reason.
- You want to talk about her. Not around the clock, of course, but the urge arises from time to time. For example, you’re discussing with friends how you want to spend your next vacation, and you remember, “By the way, [User-name] was in Portugal last summer, maybe there?” Colleagues discuss which cafe to go to after work, and you remember that she likes that sushi bar over there. Mom shares that she wants to get a cat, and you remember that she told you about the peculiarities of sphinxes. Why does this happen? Because you subconsciously, or maybe even very consciously, are constantly thinking about her, she fills your mind, and hence your conversations.
- You think about a future with her. No, this doesn’t mean wanting to get married and have children right away. Rather, you might, for example, see a trailer for a movie that’s coming out in a year and think you’d like to go there with her, you might wonder what to get her for her birthday and whether she’ll want to celebrate New Year’s with your family. Although if you’re really thinking about kids and getting married, why did you even open this article? Go get the rings!
- You’re scared. You see, when a man dates a girl he may like, but generally has no deep feelings for her – he doesn’t care. He doesn’t think about hurting her with a careless word or losing her altogether, he doesn’t ponder whether she will like his family, he doesn’t worry about her assessment of his appearance. But if a man is really in love, all this happens. Because you care about her. Because you care about her.
Love isn’t necessarily passionate kisses in the rain against the backdrop of the closing credits. Sometimes it’s the warmth and joy of having a girl by your side. Worrying about her problems, taking an interest in her opinions. But cinematic-passionate or quieter-these feelings can really bring happiness. Not the kind you see in movies, but real happiness.
