How to fall in love with her husband again – psychologist tips: why feelings cool down, how to return the passion
It often happens in family relationships that feelings cool down, and life turns into a routine. Perhaps the love has not dried up, but affected the very routine life, the lack of romance and initiative from partners. Many women are looking for information on how to fall in love with her husband again – psychologist’s tips in this will help, you should only listen to the recommendations.
How to make your husband fall in love with you again – psychologist’s tips
Every second couple is faced with such a phenomenon as the cooling of feelings. This period is characterized by increased irritability, fatigue from each other, the need for privacy.
Routine affects the relationship, and gradually the passion and former feelings leave even the strongest couple.
Women are more sensitive in terms of emotional and spiritual realms, because they are often the ones who sound the alarm as soon as they feel signs of cooling.
What attracts men to women?
A woman can and should fall in love with her husband again. This will help tips psychologist.
Why feelings cool down.
Keep warm family feelings can be, but this requires work and desire of both partners. Match these conditions are sometimes very difficult, and a woman often have this burden to bear. Because of the single effort, it often feels like everything is going wrong.
Watch this video. Where have the feelings gone? What’s killing the love in a relationship?
The reasons for the onset of a family crisis can be the following factors:
- The woman herself provokes the situation when she stops trivializing her care. Sometimes there is a feeling that for many girls the maximum program in life is to get married. After that come bathrobes, slippers and the perpetually tired, dissatisfied look. No wonder husbands begin to grow cold to their wives,
- Wanting to get married as soon as possible, many young people have no idea about the intricacies of family life. Rare woman does not want to get married because of moral unpreparedness, following social dogmas. An untidy apartment and crumpled underwear, the absence of a normal dinner is unlikely to make a man go home with a desire. Rather, he prefers to stay at work,
- Intimate problems can create additional discomfort. In this case, intimacy is an area that not every man would dare to talk about heart-to-heart. Most likely, he will look for variety on the side, but without the desire to leave the family, but just for the sake of curiosity. To avoid this happening, a woman sometimes you need to show initiative and diversity, so that marital debt has not become an everyday occurrence,
- The birth of a child, sad as it may be, can also provoke a crack in the relationship. In particular, in the intimate sphere. After another sleepless night, few have the strength to spend the night with his spouse. A woman is often too busy with the baby, and her husband may simply not have enough time,
- Sometimes the cause of family conflicts can be an unfavorable working environment. Failures, hectic schedule or financial difficulties can seriously undermine the psyche. Therefore it is worth to be patient. By the way, the influence of career on the family is more common for men, because they perceive financial instability sharper.
80% of success – a competent tactic of behavior
If in a particular case there are several reasons, then after analysis you need to identify the main one, and against it to solve the rest. Some grasp at all the nuances, solve all the problems, but such an irrational approach will take even more effort and lead to a breakup rather than to the resurrection of feelings. Rationality in family life and problems must have a place.
Basic rules
You need to remember that the goal of falling in love with your husband anew is a real and necessary one. Another question is whether the girl is ready to radically change for the sake of achieving family harmony.
For such purposes, psychologists have compiled a series of recommendations that will help to save any relationship, and it absolutely does not matter whether it is official or not.
Memories
Each couple has its own history of acquaintance and relationship, important events, dates, places.
By remembering such details, feelings can be revived by reliving the moments anew. Only it is important to talk unobtrusively with your husband about the memories. You can ask him to meet in a meaningful place or include a memorable song.
Men aren’t soulless either, and memories can help push them to experience new things.
Recreation together
The more time a couple spends together, the stronger the bond with each other. It is not necessary to go to expensive resorts. Hikes to a picnic or a movie will also bring variety.
During walks the couple should not be distracted by others. They should pay attention to themselves and their relationships.
Men often look at other women, which catches their wives off guard. But they do this not with malice, but out of banal curiosity.
Some wives in such cases choose an aggressive model of behavior, spoiling a well-started evening with their manners. However, aggression and yelling about infidelity in this case is not the answer.
It is important to keep an eye on the kind of women a man looks at. If those who wear mostly skirts – add them to your closet. For brunettes – think about changing the image.
It is important to choose the tactics of passive resistance, aggression will only worsen the situation.
Taking care of yourself
Competent care of your appearance will help to excite the interest of men again.
When the lady is neglecting herself, the man may be even embarrassed to show her in public.
From this many wives begin to sit at home and cry about destiny. Instead of changing the image, doing sports and taking care of themselves.
Communication
Sincere communication will also help in strengthening the bond and renewing feelings between spouses.
Not all couples manage to find common topics of conversation. You can diversify them by finding common hobbies. You can start small: watch a movie together and try to discuss it.
The wife should not “nag” husband, and become his companion and friend, on which you can rely.
Some psychologists advise to listen to the interests of men and adjust to them. But the pride of some people does not allow to change their interests for the benefit of men.
It is important to understand that men are not soulless creatures, the initiative will be noticed in any case. If a girl is sincerely interested in his pastime, then the man will have a reciprocal interest. Sometimes the initiative must be above hubris.
Taking the initiative
Not always the man should be the initiator in the relationship.
When the wife does not show any action, the husband may subconsciously begin to feel unwanted, changing the attitude towards her in a negative way.
Women should be creative, sometimes to seduce her husband, to show interest. This way he will feel needed, and there will be no reason for negative changes.
THIS IS INTERESTING! How to make a man fall in love with you again?
A change of scenery
A joint trip or cruise on a boat will help get rid of annoying chores.
Do not immediately jump into all the cracks and change your place of residence. But it is necessary to diversify the location of your residence.
You may also want to start a small cosmetic repairs to the apartment.
Fight with the routine
The fight against routine is of paramount importance for the stabilization of family relationships.
You have to understand that you have to constantly surprise your husband.
Groundhog Day sometimes makes things easier, when a man knows exactly what he will do in an hour or two. But sometimes you can order food delivery instead of the standard dinner, save time and watch a movie.
You can also update the style of home clothes, getting rid of shapeless robes.
What not to do
Don’t let yourself go weak emotionally.
8 out of 10 family scandals – the fault of the wife.
Ladies are often intemperate, so the man, coming home, is already a priori set up for conflict. Ignore or joke thrown about the conflict situation, will smooth out the sharp corners.
You should not give your husband a reason to have an affair on the side. Of course, both are guilty of adultery. But if a woman will not run herself, then the man will not have the desire to go left. This is worth remembering before you roll up another scandal or miss the opportunity to change lives.
In no case should you blackmail your husband with food or intimacy. It is important to understand that for them, these two factors are the basis of family comfort. Intimacy should be varied and unobtrusive, and the food tasty.
It is not necessary in every way to remind a man about his shortcomings. Chances are, he always had them, just before there was no reason to focus on them. This greatly impairs self-esteem, and can further damage the relationship.
Instead of reproaching, it is sometimes better to remain silent. Often after conflicts on this ground husbands are even more likely to show flaws, as if to protest against his wife’s behavior. Calm and care – the best way to rid your husband from smoking or addiction to computer games in the evenings.
How to make a man fall in love with you – 10 ways that work without fail.
A man, like a child, should not be blamed for the habits that a woman allows herself. Discourage from the company of friends, although she herself spends time with her friends, deprive the meal on the couch, when she herself eats near the TV. Such behavior will cause even more resentment.
On the contrary, you need to show attention and bring your husband dinner to the TV or computer. Yes, it is harmful, but such a gesture will show him that feelings are at the same level.
How to return the love of your husband
After the candy and bouquet period, family life no longer seems to be such a fairy tale, as it is presented by most girls.
Psychologists believe that both partners are to blame for the cooling of feelings during married life.
But there are recommendations that will help a woman to return a man’s love, you just need to take the initiative.
After the divorce
Divorce is a delicate matter and always unpleasant. Most girls are more acutely experiencing such an event than men.
However, after a period of emotional instability comes common sense. It prompts a woman that her husband can return. First it is important to accept and understand the cause of this situation, and then to take steps.
There are a number of practical recommendations:
- The first, and not the easiest stage, will be restoring communication. Most couples do not break up on a positive note, and such a step can be difficult for both of them. But if a woman will show cunning and wit, her plans will be successful. For example, you can give her husband a forgotten thing and use this as an excuse to continue talking. Female hidden manipulations with the right application will also not be superfluous,
- If the communication began by phone, do not run to the goal like mad, the haste may spoil the efforts previously made. To achieve the desired, it is important to wait for a convenient moment and see if there is a response impulse from the man,
- Next, you can offer to meet. Only immediately insist on a romantic evening is not necessary. To begin with, try to see each other on neutral territory. The woman should be well-groomed and rested, this kind of look will arouse the interest of men,
- It is important to try to get his attention by any adequate methods. Sincere conversations and interest in his life. Advice or just the ability to listen will be a great reason to renew old feelings.
At all stages, it is important to observe the man’s behavior. Excessive pressure will only push him away and make things worse. You have to act with his reaction in mind. Sometimes you have to take a step back, but the result is worth it.
If a woman feels his desire for a truce, but he does not talk about it openly, you should not fall into despair. You can use a woman’s cunning and hint at a romantic evening.
If the couple decide to get together after hard work to restore the relationship, it is important not to make the same mistakes. It is necessary to discuss all the intricacies of life together, and not to live in uncertainty.
A woman needs to remember that the man will begin to change, seeing her change. Therefore the first lady should often take the initiative. Change the style of dress and behavior – already a big job, and a man will appreciate the work on its own merits.
Watch this video. How to fall in love with her husband again?
After the betrayal
Infidelity is not the most pleasant event in the life of a married couple. Usually it occurs when the situation has reached its peak, the limit.
Then a woman needs to choose a slightly different model of behavior:
- Show wisdom. If adultery happened for the first time, you need to realize it and put it out of your mind. The mistake of many ladies are constant memories of an unpleasant moment. Such thoughts will in no way lead to rapprochement,
- Emotional instability in this situation is understandable. But scandalize on an empty place is not worth it, it is better to keep silent, albeit through force. Soon it will be much easier to react,
- It is necessary to become to her husband and his wife, and mistress and friend. It’s not as hard as it seems at first glance. It is enough to show a little ingenuity and feminine ingenuity not to throw tantrums over nothing. Man should feel the variety and peace, and not a constant atmosphere of tension. Then go to the left side he just will not have cause.
You need to improve yourself, not look at the mistress.
Of course, the details can be noticed, but by asking silly questions and exacerbating the situation, you can not add stability.
How to bring back passion
It happens that a man directly says that he is tired of family life. In this case it is important to try to have a constructive dialogue, do not act on emotions. It is necessary to analyze the words spoken by her husband, to criticism take the most cold and sober.
First of all, you need to work on the mistakes that are stressing your husband out. And then you can make a personal, feminine plan to get your feelings back. For example, start setting him a small but pleasant surprises.
You can try the tactic of heating up the interest of men with messages of intimate and personal content. Only it is important to be sure that he is not currently engaged in important negotiations or meetings. Flirting inevitably think back to the husband at a time when the relationship was just beginning.
Arrange a family romantic dinner after receiving a reciprocal impulse. It is important to remove any obstacles, even children and animals. The former can be given to grandparents for a couple of days, they will only be glad. It is important to spend time together, get some privacy, renew feelings and interest in each other.
Some people advise you to start rebuilding relationships with the intimate side of life. It is because of the monotony and ordinariness in this area that men often lose interest in their chosen one. The more diversity, the more interest from men.
There is no need to be too obtrusive. Men do not like this.
If he gave a rejection of your plans, it is important as calmly as possible to take it. And when emotions subside, calmly inquire about the reason for refusal. Often it is due to circumstances that have nothing to do with a woman, then the plans can be implemented in another, more convenient time.
Forum
On women’s thematic sites you can find some sensible advice on how to solve this problem.
How to fall in love with a guy – 10 ways that work without fail.
By the way, it is one of the top discussed:
- The transformation of a woman sometimes plays a decisive role, giving the necessary impetus for change. It is necessary to look after yourself and periodically change the image, so as not to bore either herself or her husband,
- The secret – in diversity. A woman should be able to reincarnate in different women. For them, it is not so difficult, even interesting. Experience for a woman and variety for a man will strengthen family relationships,
- Sometimes the cause of the problems lies on the surface. The constant employment of women and her perpetually dissatisfied mood rarely serve as a pleasant addition to family life. Therefore, it is worth to return sometimes to the image that attracted her husband a few years ago.
Conspiracy
Sometimes conspiracies really help to improve the relationship between the spouses. But they will work only if you believe in them.
The most popular is the following version: “As people look in the mirror, so my husband (name) would look at me! As the soap washes off quickly, so would my husband (name) quickly love me. As the shirt on the body is light, so my husband (name) would be light”.
Say the words above the shirt and the wax of the spouse, and then say the words above the shirt. Say the words over the shirt of your spouse, preliminarily burning the collar, it should burn only.
After the ritual, it is important to hide the thing from prying eyes away. Spouse about the ritual do not need to tell.
It is desirable to use for the ritual an old thing of the spouse. The matter is that in old things, there is more energy of the person. The more of it, the more effective the ritual will be. That is why old shirts are the best solution.
Watch this video. How to always remain interesting to her husband?
What to do to make your husband always love
The main mistake women make is trying to keep her husband on a short leash, to control. The less control, the calmer the husband.
It is worth starting to plan together a family budget. Especially if the husband gives all of his salary to his wife, although many psychologists do not think this is the right move.
Constant renewal is the husband’s interest. You need to give yourself freedom, and the relationship novelty.
It also helps to keep the family together hobbies.
90% of men prefer a confident woman.
To the man’s feelings have not cooled, you need to love herself. But it is important to know the measure. It is necessary to develop an adequate self-esteem, and do not allow weaknesses take over. Your shortcomings to learn to either hide or work on them.
If emotions run wild, you can talk out in a personal diary. By the way, his keeping helps to better see himself from the outside and indirectly contributes to the preservation of family relationships.
How to re-enamuse her husband: tips for determined women
The romantic period in your relationship is long behind, and you increasingly feel that your husband does not appreciate you. Perhaps he is rude or, conversely, indifferent, you spend less and less time together – but still do not dare to leave her husband: suddenly everything will change for the better? It will not happen by itself, warns psychologist Alexander Shakhov. But in your power to fix the relationship with her husband – at least try. First, try to become his one and only. Will not help – there is nothing to lose, connect the “heavy artillery”.
How to make a man fall in love with you
What kind of women men are in the arms? What’s in them? Why do they appreciate? Everyone wants to experience true love, to become a man of the only one with whom you want to talk, to admire, about which you want to care, with whom you want to share life – but not all it turns out. How to be a woman for whom you want to move mountains?
Evolve. Accept the fact that you have to work on yourself to attract people. No one is perfect. By recognizing that you have room to aspire to, you open up room for yourself to grow.
Work on your self-esteem. I keep telling you that low self-esteem goes hand in hand with arrogance and closeness. The men around you do not show any interest in you? Find your value, feel a unique personality, and men can not pass by.
Develop intellectually. Read good literature, look for new hobbies and interests that will ignite you. Men prefer to see a woman with whom there is something to talk about.
Be easy – do not burden a man. Know how to keep the conversation going (see the previous point), but even if the man himself is a connoisseur of Kant, he won’t refuse to talk about lighter topics from time to time.
Work on your speech. Foul language is the last thing men want to hear from the mouth of an attractive woman. Eloquence is not a gift, but a skill that can be developed.
Become more attractive. Don’t look for “some people just aren’t meant to be” excuses. Yes, everyone is born with different looks, but stylists, makeup artists, gait trainers and gyms have not canceled – if only there was a desire.
Create variety in your intimate life. Explore this important area of communication between a man and a woman. Of course, you can blame men for everything, but you can change your approach and become a skilled priestess.
Study male psychology. Your idea of an ideal woman may differ from men’s ideas, and this difference should be taken into account.
If your husband doesn’t appreciate you: the #tapkiwsad technique
I will also share with you the author’s technique, which should be applied if a man, to put it mildly, is impudent or, in the words of scientific psychology, devalues the personal needs of his partner. It is necessary if you often quarrel with her husband, his spouse does not respect your personal boundaries and causes pain, relations are already at a standstill, but you still drag them and hope for the best.
80% of the families who have used this technique are now together. 20% of women have ended relationships in which they were unhappy.
What’s the point? You actually have to declare a moratorium on communication with your partner . Say, “I feel pain in our relationship. I need a pause to think about how things will go from here. That’s why you and I won’t see or communicate for a month. After that, we’ll meet to discuss what we’re going to do next.”
Important: You don’t break off the relationship. You are taking a pause. This is to show your partner, who can no longer hear the words, that you are brought to an extreme level of desperation, and give him the opportunity to realize the possibility of breaking off the relationship.
You quickly get used to a good thing. And in domestic life, the man quickly loses sight of the value you represent. “What we have, we do not keep, and when we lose, we cry.” For a man to regain a sense of your value, you have to take it away for a while – #tapkivsad.
The male psyche reacts differently to a breakup. What happens when a partner finds himself in the “garden” and in “slippers”?
The first week goes by the motto “Festival in Brazil!”: feeling like he’s out of control, the man goes into withdrawal. Beer is poured by the river, friends come in droves, at night he drunkenly flirts on dating sites, wide gestures throwing dirty socks around the house, unlimited watching TV or races in the tanchiki on the computer. Life is good!
At this point, the man is happy to be able to breathe freely and go back to the teenage years, when there was a lot of freedom. But after a week begins to come memories from the same period, which he had safely forgotten.
It is not possible to go for a walk with impunity – quickly goes health and money. And along with the money miraculously disappear and friends – those who are single and always broke. And those who are married already deny and, smiling guiltily, with a poorly concealed sense of superiority, they say: “Well, you are now free as a bird. I’ve got a family, man, I’m sorry,” and they go back to the house smelling of comfort and coziness, leaving the hero with a bottle of ketchup and a case of beer in the fridge.
Women on dating sites demand flowers, restaurants, and a serious relationship. But he had already managed to forget about it like a bad dream, and he does not want to start this cycle over again.
By the end of the second week a man gets tired of doing his own laundry, cooking frozen dumplings, and a mountain of unwashed dishes blocks the entrance to the kitchen. And at this point in the man’s soul begins to creep longing for a gentle wife, cooked borscht and peace of mind for a satisfied future. In a fit of nostalgic love, a man for the first time timidly dials a text message: “Hi. How are you?”
When to start communicating with your husband again
So, we left our hero at the end of the second week in longing. Many women are upset, “What’s so-so he doesn’t miss me?” But have you forgotten why you sent him off to the garden with his slippers? Because he didn’t appreciate you as a woman. And the process of appreciation is just beginning!
And so the man begins to throw you a text message and tries to make up. At this point the woman, exhausted by the question “Am I doing the right thing?”, gives up and takes a hungry in every way and temporarily submissive husband back to his home. This is not the way to do it.
Has he had a rethinking of his values? No! There wasn’t enough time. And you – the knowledge of how the male psyche works. As a result: after some time he will get used to it again, and you will get the same seal that you had.
And how do you do it? You still have to wait! Exactly one month.
The properties of the male psyche are as follows: after two weeks, the negative memories are displaced and the positive ones remain – this is nostalgia. In the third week, only the pleasant moments of your relationship remain in the man’s memory. He remembers who he loves and begins to miss you as a person. He realizes that you are an asset! This is the insight he is looking for!
The man is pounding his doorstep, looking for meetings, begging, and truly repenting. Only after a month from the beginning #tapkivsad you can start a dialogue with him . But not with reconciliation. And with a trip to a family psychologist to develop new rules of communication. This is very important! If you don’t change your behavioral script, you will both come to the same result.
Will he agree to therapy in a month? Yes! After all, he really appreciates you now.
And if he doesn’t? You have learned that this man doesn’t need you. Is it worth the regret of getting rid of a parasite and ballast that doesn’t care about you? I don’t think words are necessary.
Yes, the technique is not easy, it requires preparation – both organizational and emotional. It will be hard for you, you will want to get in touch with him before the deadline. If you go towards yourself, or succumb to his influence, blame yourself, the technique will not work. Apply only once.
