Does a married woman need a lover?

Why do you need a lover?

Married ladies, share your thoughts, why do you need a lover and how long have you had one? I have one too, for the first time in my life after 10 years of marriage. Personally, I need a lover to tone up and raise a woman’s self-esteem. My relations with my husband are brotherly, he hasn’t seen me as a woman for a long time. What about you?

I have the same, my husband stopped seeing me as a woman a long time ago, even allowed himself friendly words like you have grown old. etc. Plus he hasn’t turned me on in a long time.

And how long have you all who are “for tone” been married that your husbands don’t see you as women anymore? We have been married for 16 years, of course we were tired of each other and separated, and we went on vacation separately. It was a long time ago that he cheated and I forgave him, there were times when I cheated and he did not know. I realized very quickly that my husband was better than my lover. But that nothing to each other for me it is strange. I sometimes have such a tenderness for him).

I don’t understand why you would ever refuse to have sex with someone you like? Married or not, it does not matter, my principle – the more sex in your life, the better. And not just dumb sex, like he bangs like a jackhammer, I don’t need that kind of sex, I need to have vivid orgasms and more.

“like he’s a jackhammer.”) It’s amazing that so many men genuinely think that the stronger they are. They hammer, the more the woman is in the buzz!!!)

Author, can I ask you a question in your topic? Girls, write down what your lover does for you? And what can you ask him to do/buy? I am interested in both material and non-material side of the help, except sex. How much does he take part in your life?

I can bake by myself.) But why live with a husband for whom you as a woman is nothing, not very clear.

He doesn’t see his wife as a woman and insults her – that’s one situation; you have to break up. Just “stopped wanting each other” (doesn’t even matter who first), but there are plenty of other perks to marriage – it’s a whole other thing! If I at 75 will be comfortable with this grandpa to spend his old age (and now I live pretty well, and both of them), the lack of sex in his youth can be compensated without breaking up the family!

I should say at once: I do not receive sums from Him on a regular basis. I will get any help I ask for. Well, within reasonable limits, of course ))

But I seriously wonder why I need a lover. After 10 years of quiet life with a spouse who sees me as a friend, lover, mistress and mother of our children, who is willing to do anything for me, I gave in to temptation and now a mistress. ewww – and even as she, I can not calmly pronounce the word. What I get from a lover is goosebumps, sexual energy, a slight state of euphoria, and the fear of losing everything I have. That’s how to convince my pee-pee that goosebumps aren’t worth a broken family where everyone is so happy. But I can’twww, I’m trying, honestly, I can’t. He touches me and all my pure thoughts immediately dissolve. I had to get in so much trouble.

Truly – don’t live long!) That’s a fact. And then you think, ospadi, well, what a fool I was, and here because of this so much frayed nerves. )

Pleasant when he cares, says all sorts of things. Even though I know it’s nonsense, he is married, but it feels good. My husband cheated 3 years ago, revenge, so to speak. I get pleasure from love. Because his not believe more, and from this you know what to expect. marriage of 11 years.With Lu 2 months, I have him first, I hope the last, as the family is enough. I cheat for emotional balance, so I was better, because not going to destroy his family.

I have one. he is quite a tough person, but only writes or speaks. We take it as a game.

My husband rarely says nice things (10 years of marriage) and there is less romance. All I get from my lover. Well, and variety in sex, desire, passion is also an important aspect.

“Relationships with my husband are brotherly, he does not see a woman in me for a long time” – i.e. you do not have sex at all? Right? I mean, for example, my relationship with my sister is “brotherly” – as a woman I am not attracted to her, and we have not had sex with her, no, and it is impossible to even think about it. And if you and your husband have sex once in a while, and sleep with your lover, it’s not a brotherly relationship, it’s a fucking relationship, so please try to call things by their proper names.

I’m the author. You can, of course, find a word other than “fraternal,” but that doesn’t change the point. If I have sex with my husband once every six months, and even then at my initiative, then every woman would cry. And it’s not that I’m unhappy, or kicking him or anything like that. On the contrary. It’s just that my husband doesn’t need it anymore, he’s doing great without sex. If I didn’t “jerk” him around, we wouldn’t have sex at all. My lover, on the other hand, is shaking at the sight of me. He wants me all the time and many times, even though he is much older than my husband. Physiology is different. And love, of course.

You’re so naive.)) You want sex, but your husband, a man, doesn’t? Yes, he does, just not with you. He doesn’t see YOU as a woman anymore, no matter how well-groomed you are. And if he doesn’t want sex with you, it means he has enough sex with others on the side. Your husband also wants some woman many times over. Or do you seriously believe that only your lover cheats on your wife and your husband doesn’t?)

So how does that change the subject? A lover in a situation like this is the best solution for everyone. The husband is happy, the wife is happy, no one interferes with anyone’s life or forces unwanted sex, everyone is comfortable and happy. Or do you think you need to force your husband to perform his marital duties?

5. For profit or career advancement (with a boss or a teacher). 6. Not getting laid. Young, beautiful, work with interesting men, and at home a life and a boring husband.

Yes, her husband really does not want sex. At all. He has no libido, it has faded with age. And the fact that he doesn’t have anyone, that’s for sure. To and from work like clockwork, no business trips, no absences, no texting. It’s as quiet as a tank.

Celebrities are on trend.

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What a married woman needs a lover for

When there is no room for passion in the relationship with her husband, some wives, in order to feel desirable again, start thinking about finding a lover. Communication on the side helps brighten up the monotonous, mundane days. But always remember that even with a careful disguise, there is a possibility that the new passion will be known to the spouse. Therefore, before you decide to take such a desperate step, it is worth thinking about whether it is worth it to jeopardize the marriage.

Common reasons why a married woman has a lover

Often, the reason why a married woman has a lover, becomes banal disappointment in the marriage. At the beginning of the relationship people only reveal to each other the best aspects of their character, and at the very beginning often a person is guided by passion.

In marriage, there are various difficulties, which can not always be solved without fighting. As a result, relationships over time, can begin to “burst at the seams,” and sex is even a rarity.

To once again feel attractive and desired, and just the woman decides to find a relationship on the side, not hurrying to arrange a divorce from her husband.

Systemic reasons

According to statistics, the most common representative of the fair sex looking for a partner on the side, after crossing the thirty-year mark. But, why do women find lovers? The systemic reasons and psychology of men and women are quite different.

  • For the stronger sex it is the search for new sensations, the exploration of the unknown and variety.
  • For ladies, it’s trying to fill the gaps of material, emotional and other needs. Also wives often cheat on their life partner out of desperation.

Frequent Reasons

Why do you need a lover, what reasons push a married lady to cheat:

  • Boredom. Not only men cheat out of boredom, but also women. Especially this reason is inherent in those ladies who are at home, do not work and in any way try to find new entertainment for themselves.
  • Dissatisfaction. The monotonous family life, when both spouses thoroughly studied each other’s preferences in bed and can predict every next action, eventually gets boring. The effect of novelty disappears, which leads to irritability. In this case, the woman most often sees the only way to get the long-awaited satisfaction in bed is to find another man.
  • Conquering a new object. Some beautiful women can not live without flirting and often are not able to stop the game in time, which leads to treason.
  • Curiosity. This reason is especially suitable for those ladies who got married innocently or with not so much experience in sexual life.
  • Financial side. This reason sounds ugly, but if the spouse is not able to buy the spouse an expensive thing that she dreams of, the woman begins to look for material support on the side.

A single, in love lover can cause a lot of problems in the future, if he decides that the lady should be only his and does not want to share her with her husband.

It is noteworthy that unfaithful wives, more often than not, are not ready to leave their husbands. For them an affair on the side is just a way to diversify life. While the established life does not want to change at all.

Other popular reasons

Other popular reasons explaining why women find lovers include:

  • Genesis. Ensuring the cleanliness of the apartment and cooking – all this rests on women’s shoulders. Doing the same things every day is capable of throwing any woman off-balance. Meetings with a lover are devoid of bother – there is only romance and fresh feelings.
  • Lack of support. If the husband takes all the deeds of his wife for granted, does not give support, ignores all the problems and is not capable of a manly act – that’s another reason why a woman should have a lover.
  • He is unbelievable. His facial features are beautiful, and he himself looks like Apollo, who makes a woman feel like a queen – in this case, even the most highly moral person can hardly say to herself “stop” in time and not disappear in his embrace.
  • Revenge. As trivial as it may sound, but the desire to avenge her husband for cheating and to show him what it feels like to be humiliated, makes the wife find a lover.

How to get a lover: the pitfalls

Married women have a man on the side is somewhat more difficult than those who are not burdened with obligations. But, on the other hand, many members of the stronger sex, prefer married mistresses, because this option eliminates the need for future marriage.

So, some tips for a successful search:

  • You can engage in a purposeful search or rely on the will of fate, for example, cherish the hope of meeting in a cafe or other places.
  • It is better to choose a lover who lives far from the home of the spouses.
  • You should not tell anyone about your search, especially if it was successful, not even your girlfriends.
  • The best option is a married man who also benefits from keeping the meetings a secret.

As for the pitfalls: there is a danger of confusing passion with love. A woman, if she wants to save her marriage, should not lose her temper.

Need to be aware that the new sensations, even if they brought a spice to the measured life, is not a deep sense.

Pros and cons of feminine infidelity

Every lady decides to commit adultery for certain reasons, but it is worth noting that adultery for women has both positive and negative aspects.

  • Such an act gives a sense of power over another man and increases self-esteem.
  • Allows you to change your life by 180 degrees and experience vivid emotions that were previously so lacking.
  • Gives a sense of novelty and allows you to get thrills.
  • Regular sex has a positive effect on women’s health.
  • Cheating out of revenge can be a good way to humiliate your husband and at the same time experience new emotions in bed with another.

The unfaithful husband himself is most often not ready to forgive the betrayal of his spouse. Do not think that such an argument will be accepted.

  • A girl who has a lover is constantly in a state of stress, because she has to hide him from her husband and make up constant excuses about her delays at work.
  • It is necessary to take care of yourself. Over the years of marriage, passion fades and the husband no longer cares as much about how his wife looks, unlike the lover who wants to see a pretty picture in front of him.
  • The possibility of catching a venereal disease or getting pregnant from a partner, even if contraception is used during intimacy.
  • The possibility of ruining the marriage if the husband becomes aware of his wife’s betrayal.

A bit of statistics

Specialists in the field of family matters conducted a study where the beautiful half, were asked to answer the question whether a married woman needs a lover. Also, the respondents were asked if they were cheating on their husbands.

So, according to the data, the following statistics were compiled:

  • 57 out of 100 women had deep feelings for their lover, up to and including love.
  • Up to the age of 40, 47% of ladies who work in an office, and 27% of women who work from home have cheated on their spouse.
  • Females who work in an office full time are more likely to have a man in secret from their husbands than those who work from home.

Tips from a psychologist

According to psychologists, a married woman, comes to the desire to cheat on her husband consciously. Most often, in this case, the betrayal is the fault of the man, who either cannot boast of fidelity himself, or has ceased to see his wife as a woman.

Almost any betrayal is the result of misconduct by both spouses when there are problems in the relationship and family.

Be that as it may, even if the wife has had adultery, it is not worth abandoning the family for the sake of the lover, especially if he does not need it. You should also stop in time to avoid being discovered by your husband.

Thus, it is impossible to unequivocally answer the question of why a married woman has a lover. Treason can occur for completely different reasons. And it is worth noting that even the best husband, who honors and wants to please his second half in everything, can be betrayed.

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