Compulsiveness in a relationship: we explain thoroughly

Men’s insistence in relationships, its main manifestations

Intrusiveness in the relationship on the part of a man often crosses the permissible edge and begins to make the girl nervous. The desire to see a loved one near is absolutely normal, but excessive insistence can lead to the breakup of the novel, negative emotions and the wrong impression.

Compulsiveness in a relationship on the part of a man

Usually the situation is such that the guy behaves obsessively and does not see anything wrong in his actions. The girl feels discomfort, but does not speak directly, afraid to offend the suitor.

Patience ends quickly, warm feelings fade. An obsessive guy in a relationship can ruin everything and bring the couple to the breakup.

Signs of an obsessive man

Many guys want to take care of girls, protect them, defend them, know about the events happening in their lives. If you do not stop in time, such tutelage can develop into intrusiveness with characteristic signs.

Excessive attention.

All people periodically want to be alone or take care of personal matters. A girl may have a meeting with her girlfriends planned for the evening. She has the right to spend time without the presence of a suitor. The phone is not an extension of her hand to be online 24/7 and communicate with the beau.

Busy guys don’t understand this, shower the girl with rebukes, and get offended.

When the partner wants to mind her own business, it is also worth finding something to do (read a book, meet with friends, visit her parents).

If a man constantly offers his society, he is unlikely to show himself as a good chosen one in the future. It will be hard to build a family and a healthy union with him.


SMS chats, social networks and messengers make people’s lives easier, but they make some couples uncomfortable.

An intrusive guy in a relationship is constantly texting the girl with similar content: “Where are you?”, “What are you doing?”, “Why aren’t you answering?”, “Why did you stop talking?”, etc. From the outside it looks like an attempt to control. Excessive intrusiveness violates other people’s personal boundaries, and causes rejection and feelings of dislike.

Restrictions and Inhibitions

Overly intrusive guys sometimes demonstrate an increased sense of jealousy of the girl. This is due to his low self-esteem, insecurity.

Sometimes the situation reaches the point of absurdity. The guy forbids his beloved to wear bright makeup, to wear open dresses, to meet his girlfriends. All this is due to a strong love. Cavalier believes that a woman should have enough of his company, because he cares, gives gifts, takes him to the movies.

Even if the girl goes out somewhere, the lover always follows her, does not leave her alone.

From such manifestations of care the girl could ruin relationships with others, break social ties. When one partner is not considered the desires of the other, the union can not be called harmonious.

The desire to incline to intimacy

Intrusiveness in the relationship on the part of a man is often explained by the fact that he wants to incline the girl to sexual intimacy. The guy is constantly touching her, making dates at late hours, asking her to come home or inviting her to his place.

Sometimes a man makes ardent declarations of love before he has had time to get to know the girl properly. This is also done for a reason; in this way he wants to move more quickly to the stage of more intimate interaction.

The young lady is not always ready for intimacy. Intrusiveness partner violates her personal boundaries, can cause a sense of fear.


In an obsessive man is considered the norm to arrange for a girl to be followed, to seek information about her place of residence, phone number. When he finds out her address, he arrives at it, endlessly asking the girl to go out, take time, asking her to come home.

Such behavior already goes beyond not only politeness, but also adequacy. In such a situation a girl should tell her relatives and friends about this situation and possibly go to the police.

What is the difference between a persistent and intrusive person

Persistence is the desire to achieve some goal. It can also manifest itself in the cavalier’s attempts to win the girl he likes. However, the guy acts carefully, does not violate the personal boundaries of the woman and does not create inconvenience for her.

Intrusiveness is also a desire to get his own way. The difference is that a clingy man offers the girl his society, care, etc., and she does not need it. He is often resentful because he is sure he is only guided by his best motives, and this is not appreciated.

Why men are intrusive in relationships

Intrusive guys don’t always realize that they are behaving inappropriately. Usually they pester girls for a variety of reasons:

  • The desire to reap other people’s wealth (if the girl earns good money or is financially secure);
  • mental deviations;
  • lack of tact, education;
  • Unsuccessful experience of past relationships;
  • Difficulties in relations with the opposite sex.

In the first days or weeks of dating a lady will be pleased with increased male attention, but then it can turn into a real nightmare for her.

How to get rid of an obsessive man

Men’s obsessiveness in relationships often causes girls to behave aggressively, rudely, to assert their personal boundaries. Clingy cavalier it “turns on” even more. He believes that the young lady challenges him.

To avoid being in this situation, it is worth using small tricks:

  • Learn to say “no”, not to give reasons to continue flirting and false hopes;
  • Find out more about the cavalier, find out what qualities irritate him in girls. As soon as he appears in sight, you should behave in accordance with his dislike. Sometimes it is not unreasonable to buy a pack of cigarettes if he does not like smokers, or a month to come to work only in pants if his ideal is a feminine beauty;
  • completely avoid physical contact (hugging, touching);
  • Never accept help from him, even the most minimal. Demonstrate complete independence;
  • Pretend that his hints are incomprehensible;
  • tell in the presence of an intrusive man about his fiancé and the approaching wedding (even if it has to be made up on purpose);
  • intrusive suitors can scare away the ring on her finger. If a girl is not married, then on the right hand you should wear a simple gold ring on the days of supposed meetings with an undesirable suitor;
  • directly offer him to meet a young lady who is more interested in communication, or offer the annoying guy to create a profile on a dating site;
  • Maybe he likes a colleague, friend, or acquaintance. It is worth unobtrusively arranging a meeting with them, helping them to get acquainted, and then stealthily leaving. There is a chance that the obsessive man will switch his attention to another girl;
  • Put him on a blacklist in all social networks, messengers, phone book. An adequate person will understand that they just don’t want to communicate with him and will stop trying to court him.

Increased attention is unpleasant for girls, so it is important to pay attention to the feelings of others and respect them. If the young lady is not interested in the relationship, it is better to switch to another girl or occupation.

Intrusiveness. Intrusiveness in a relationship.

In a relationship between people, it is important not to cross a fine line. Turning care for a friend, attention to a loved one into intrusiveness and obsession. The desire to see and hear your loved one is quite natural. But, people have different needs for communication, so conflicts arise. One person thinks that he was not interesting and begins to show increased activity. The partner avoids talking, avoids meetings, does not answer the phone. Excessive insistence leads to the breakup of a friendly or romantic relationship. How to get rid of obsession in a relationship?

Signs of an obsessive man

Where is that line between obsessive and caring? One problem is that one partner genuinely doesn’t realize that his or her behavior is intrusive. At the same time, the other half doesn’t speak directly because he doesn’t want to offend. But, patience ends quickly, and the relationship breaks down.

Jealousy appears. The close person demands to be taken to meetings, work corporate parties. Fear of loneliness. Fear that the loved one will leave. Hence there is persistence and a desire to spend free time together. People who fear the breakup of the relationship, demand from the other half words of love, actions. They need constant proof. Lack of independence. All decisions are made mutually. Without a friend or loved one, elementary problems are not solved. Sometimes the situation reaches the point of absurdity. The annoying person is fenced off from the rest of the circle of communication, focusing exclusively on the beloved.

A declaration of love by text message, a bouquet of flowers.

There are cases when the intrusiveness in the relationship on the part of a woman is manifested at the stage of acquaintance. Men perceive such behavior in different ways. They believe that the insistence indicates:

of poor upbringing; makes it clear that in front of the man is an available girl; an alarming sign, the guy understands that he will be kept on a short leash.

low self-esteem; insecurity; jealousy and desire to control every step of his beloved.

Trust your other half and do not scare away your insistence. Make a pleasant surprise to the girl, do not demand a response. Stop storming the fortress for a couple of days. Surely your beloved will call by herself, thanking you for the surprise and offer to meet.

Intrusiveness in the relationship: how to combat?

First of all, calm down and accept the situation. Next, try to understand that the need for communication between a man and a woman is different. Reduce the number of phone calls, messages and signs of attention to the other half. You can’t completely dissolve into the other person. Replace the time of communication with your loved one with other things to do: meet with friends, get creative, visit an exhibition.

Gain confidence, increase your self-esteem. How to avoid obsession in a relationship?

Find a hobby. An interesting occupation immerses a person, makes him forget about problems. By taking up a new hobby, you will notice that you have become more interesting to people. Constant calls occur because you are bored. A businessman has no time for idle talk. Interact with people. Spread the need to communicate with different people. Go to the movies with a friend, invite friends for dinner, organize a picnic. Being with your loved one in the company, you’ll learn it from a different side and show yourself. Do not turn a relationship into a need. Do not set the task at any cost to make a friend or girlfriend. Periods of loneliness – it’s normal for man. At this point, he analyzes the previous actions, making plans for the future. The desire to meet a soul mate is welcome, but do not turn it into a need. Trust your significant other. The other half perceives intrusiveness as mistrust. Constant questioning, “where were you,” “why did not pick up the phone” irritating and offensive. If sneaking suspicions, it is better to talk frankly with your loved one. Do not carry the experience of previous relationships to new ones.

Treat yourself with respect and love. Often, prying is a need for a friend or loved one. Low self-esteem pushes a person to find a strong shoulder or support. To build a healthy relationship, work on yourself. Visit interesting places, make acquaintances, enjoy solitude. Come confidence, the value of freedom and personal space. Only then begin to build new relationships.

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