Why is a man afraid of the woman in love and how to deal with it?
Fear of the object of love is inherent in representatives of both sexes.
However, embarrassment and indecision on the part of a man is not consistent with the expected behavior and is perceived in society negatively.
Therefore, this fear is often buried deep inside, which only exacerbates the problem. Consider the causes of the phenomenon and methods for dealing with the situation.
Causes of fear
To cope with the problem, it is necessary to find out the reason why fear arises, what its nature is.
- Unwillingness to lose freedom. Men tend to value freedom. It is easy to understand that a close relationship will entail some restrictions. Since a man is not always ready to change his lifestyle, he will try to stifle the feelings that have flared up in him. Overcoming the fear of a relationship largely depends on the woman. If she is not inclined to control her loved ones, the man will gradually relax.
- Fear of heartache . A man does not always have a positive experience with past relationships. If a former love has caused severe disappointment, there may be a persistent reluctance to step on the same rake again.
How to understand that fear is because of feelings?
External manifestations that allow you to understand that a man is afraid of a woman because of the outbreak of feelings:
- tries to hide his flaws and always makes himself look good;
- Unable to look away from a woman;
- at the sight of the object of love makes involuntary actions that give away strong excitement (nervously rubs his shirt, blushes, fixes his hair);
- does not know how to sit down, where to put his hands, makes other awkward movements;
- speech becomes slurred, the man stammers and gets confused;
- tries to hide embarrassment with unnatural animation, inappropriate jokes;
- tries in every possible way to show care, to protect and defend the object of love.
Who is prone to this phobia?
Despite the fact that there may be many reasons for fear, not everyone is prone to it. Most often, this phobia develops in the following category of men:
- Experienced a strong fear of their mother (grandmother, kindergarten teacher) as a child;
- grew up in a dysfunctional family with many quarrels and other negative things between parents;
- have complexes about their appearance, physical abilities, financial situation, status in society, etc.
Often fear of the woman he loves is accompanied by a variety of mental disorders in men, including:
- gipengiophobia – fear of responsibility;
- Atichiophobia – fear of making a mistake;
- Bacteriophobia – fear of contracting bacteria;
- Helophobia – fear of ridicule;
- koitophobia – pathological avoidance of sexual relations.
Men who have received a lot of stress from their first marriage find it very difficult to make new contact. This is the main difference in the behavioral patterns of men and women. A woman’s failed marriage usually does not become a barrier to a new relationship.
How to cope with the situation?
The first step to overcoming fear is to admit the fact of this condition. Further development of the relationship depends on both sides: man and woman.
To the man in love
We must admit that in order to find our happiness, we sometimes have to meet many times and make mistakes. No one is immune from meeting unsuitable people.
In practice, even many years after a stressful incident, it is not easy to let go of the past. This applies both to childhood experiences and to events in adulthood that dictate their own rules of behavior. As a result, the emotional sphere suffers and numerous phobias develop.
There is no point in running away from their desires and impoverishing personal life. A man needs to discover their unconscious desires and start to act. Already the first successful steps give confidence, and the feeling of fear will begin to leave. You can directly tell a woman about his discomfort. Adequate women will take the confession as a pleasant frankness and will help in every way to prolong the fear.
To let a new relationship into your life, you need to emotionally break up with the unsuccessful past and start thinking differently. To overcome this threshold by yourself is sometimes very difficult and you need the help of a psychologist.
If a woman does not care about the man, she has a chance to help him overcome his fears:
- Be as open as possible to discuss problems. Benevolence, positive attitude – the best helpers.
- A mask of unapproachability will only increase fears. If the joy of even small signs of attention from a man in love, the progress of rapprochement will increase.
- Flirting with other men in front of a timid admirer will scare him away even more and make him permanently abandon his original plans.
The more opportunities and occasions for men to show their gallantry and feelings, the faster he will get rid of fear. A woman does not need to flaunt their independence and bad character. There are enough conflicts in our lives.
Is it worth building a relationship in this situation?
A woman may hesitate in the prospects for a serious relationship. It is natural, because I want to live my life with someone who can lean on in a difficult moment.
However, the fear of the beloved woman does not detract from such a dignity as manhood. To understand what this man is really capable of, we must observe whether he knows how to solve their problems, how to cope with difficulties, how to communicate with friends and relatives.
Modesty and shyness in relation to the beloved girl is physiologically justified. If a person is basically unable to take responsibility for themselves and their loved ones, to make their own decisions, a happy harmonious family will not work.
The main mistake of women – confidence that they will be able to “re-educate” their partner. In practice you can help a man to show its latent possibilities, but to remake his essence is impossible.
Watch the video about the psychology and causes of men’s fear of beloved women:
Fear of the object of love is the most common problem that concerns relationships. To get rid of fear, you need to understand its causes and prioritize it. You don’t have to allow for a personal catastrophe.
To understand the causes of fear will help a professional psychologist. Getting rid of serious psychological problems will open up new life prospects for the person. He will begin to perceive a bad experience as an event that provides an opportunity to draw the right conclusions, become wiser and move on.
12 signs that men are afraid of you
Although we have come to expect men to act rather boldly when meeting women, in fact, many of them feel uncomfortable in their presence.
If you are smart, beautiful, and confident, however, many men may simply have an inferiority complex.
Here are a few signs that you are too cool for the representatives of the stronger sex.
Why men are afraid of women
1. Men look at you, but do not approach you.
This is a sure sign that either you’re dressed too extravagantly or sexy to the point that it’s scary to approach you. Simply put, many men think that some women are just not their level and you automatically fall into this category.
2. they are constantly trying to pick on you.
This way of flirting from a mix of compliments and banter helps to shake a woman’s self-esteem so that she becomes more vulnerable and condescends to his level.
3. You are considered a beautiful friend in the company, but still single.
You are alone because others are just afraid to start a conversation with you. Despite all your fine qualities, you can be difficult to find the right man.
4. You are rarely called out on dates.
Men tend to prefer hotties you can just have fun with if they’re looking for a no-strings-attached relationship. This helps them feel superior. This leads to the fact that really good women are not approached as often. But, if a man does approach, he usually has more serious intentions.
Men are afraid of beautiful women.
5. A man begins to stammer, blush, and tense up around you.
These are classic signs that a man is worried in your presence. If you notice them, he may be too embarrassed to ask you out.
6. You overhear why a girl like you would want to go out with him.
If you heard a phrase like that, it’s pretty clear that he doesn’t think he’s worthy of you. Perhaps you should be softer and more vulnerable. If a man says that, he likes you, but he’s insecure.
7. You catch men looking at you, but they immediately turn away if you notice them.
This is a sign that they are trying to stealthily look at you, but think their chances are too slim.
8. Men are trying to brag to you.
If a man is trying to show off his financial solvency, pulling some tricks or trying to get attention in some other way, then he likes you and is looking for recognition from you.
Many men who are afraid of women rely on material resources to get what they want because they don’t think their personality is attractive enough.
9. He is intimidated by the number of partners you have dated.
If a man gets nervous or loses his temper when he finds out how many partners you’ve had, he’s intimidated by your experience.
10. You feel like the man wants to say something to you, but doesn’t dare to do it.
Usually in this case your intuition does not fail you. Men tend to be obvious in these matters.
11. You have a reputation as a woman who can put a man in his place.
If you’re known for being straightforward and defiant, it’s not surprising that many men will simply be afraid to approach you. After all, no one wants their ego to be hurt.
12. You seem emotionally cold.
Even if you’re not, men try to avoid women who seem cold or sarcastic because they feel you might blow them off.
We’re on social networking sites.
This reminds me of a joke: “Honey, you know, we can not continue to meet. – ? – my friends say that you. Well, you’ve been with a lot of men. – well, tell me, am i not a good housekeeper? – No, you’re a great hostess. Are you ashamed to be with me in public? – No way. Maybe I’m not good enough for you as a woman. – You’re a great woman. – so what, you think I learned everything in a correspondence course?