Why Men Hide Their Feelings
Why do men hide their feelings? This question often worries many ladies. Often members of the stronger sex are stingy in showing their emotions and no matter what feelings women have caused them, they behave with restraint. Psychologists argue that men are usually soft and vulnerable, but why do they pretend to be unfeeling and unfamiliar with heartstrings? The answer is simple enough: they want to please, because the members of the stronger sex instilled since childhood the idea that a real man should be unwavering and tough.
Why do men hide their feelings for a woman?
Fairer sex often do not understand the goals, actions, feelings of their chosen and are constantly in the dark, that they feel to them. Why is it so?
Representatives of the stronger sex until they earn capital, make a career – to serious relationship do not tend. After deciding to have a relationship, a man strives to provide a decent life for his lady and works even harder to achieve this. Love or passion is not reflected in the productivity of a man’s work. A representative of the stronger sex does not stop the usual life for him – meetings with friends, hobbies, and at the same time introduces another item in his schedule – the woman he loves and her problems. The fair sex woman in the relationship, on the contrary, gives herself completely to the new feeling. Domestic chores, friends, and work take second place. Therefore, very often women are offended by their husbands because of the lack of attention given to them.
Why does a man, when in love, hides his feelings?
For a man in love is characterized by confusion and shyness. If previously self-confident representative of the stronger sex behaved boldly, showing determination, as well as pressure in all actions, then during meetings with his beloved, he feels some discomfort, is afraid to open up and show his weakness, demonstrating feelings. Immediate surroundings notice in a man of these internal changes.
Representatives of the stronger sex so explain the reasons why a man, when in love, hides his feelings for a woman. Below will be given some examples:
– Most women like “bad” guys who do not adhere to norms, rules and foundations. Ladies like to be near such a chosen one, because you never know what to expect, and at any moment there is an anticipation of an adrenaline rush. That is why unhappy men have to put on the mask of scoundrels and cynics;
– Men hide their feelings because they think they must behave that way. Women are allowed to be emotional and sensual, but such men are not welcomed by society. In fact, both sexes are emotional in the same way;
– Men often lie about the number of their ex-girlfriends in order to appear more desirable in the eyes of the opposite sex. The idea that a man has been able to charm one woman in the past two or three years forces him to make up convoluted love stories about his past;
– A man hides his feelings in order not to show how much he likes a lady and how much he is already in love with her;
– For representatives of the stronger sex, the definition of “in love” is equal to the definition of “weak. It is difficult to find a representative of the stronger sex who will call himself weak, it is because of this fear that men hide their feelings;
– It is noticed that women, after realizing that the chosen one is already in their “networks”, lose interest in him. Such behavior alarms the stronger sex and forces them to be more restrained in the manifestation of feelings;
– Men do not want to show that they are dependent on a particular woman and do not like to be conquered;
– Unwillingness to be controlled causes men to hide their feelings;
– fear of being completely defenseless also makes the strong sex hide their feelings. It takes time and trust to open up to another person. Men, just like women, have weaknesses and are very wary of being hit;
– Men are more dependent than women in terms of intimacy. Women often do not even realize that they can easily manipulate the stronger sex and men are in no hurry to tell them about it;
– Each representative of the strong sex is proud that he is a man and likes to demonstrate his inner strength, to impress the lady of interest.
So, it becomes clear that there is nothing unusual and strange in the behavior of men. They are as best they can, win and hold the interest of the young lady he likes.
Why men hide their feelings – the opinion of psychologists
According to most of the fair sex, male psychology is a rather primitive thing. But thinking so, ladies are mistaken. The representatives of the stronger sex are concrete, not mediocre. They do not like to create problems in an empty space, complicating things. And in general, the strong half, compared to women, behaves in a completely different way. Therefore, only an understanding of all the intricacies of the device men’s psychology will give the weak sex to build the most effective models of relationships with their chosen one.
Male psychology is so constructed that only outwardly they are overly persistent, assertive and unwavering. Often this is a mask. Most women are at a loss as to why they do not develop relationships with men. They do not realize that in dealing with men, taking a mask for reality, and therefore commit a large number of mistakes, which is not forgiven by the male sex.
It has long been customary to refer to men as the stronger sex. This attitude they have only because of the physical advantages over the ladies, but mentally they are not as strong as the beautiful half. Often the female sex does not understand that their chosen ones accompanying them in life can also be wounded and vulnerable, in need of care and tenderness.
It is not uncommon for each individual to sin by interpreting the other person through the prism of self. In other words, each subject ascribes to the other individual character traits that are peculiar to himself or a pattern of behavior that is noted in him under certain conditions. And when the partner in the relationship behaves differently, the person thinks that he or she is not cherished. And in fact the partner only expresses disagreement, sympathy, or agreement in a different way.
Often in life, people are unable to look at situations from an alternative perspective or an outsider’s perspective. In difficult situations, wives do not want to put themselves in their husbands’ shoes, and only assume how they should act. In doing so, women are oblivious to the many contributing factors and personalities. Therefore, the average husband, lacking the ability to read women’s minds, acts in a completely different way. Because of this, there are women’s resentments against husbands who do not want to understand them. Of course, this approach has a negative effect on the relationship between the sexes.
Why do men hide their feelings and how do you know what your beloved feels?
A woman is very important not to rush her man. Endless questions “Do you love me?” or “How do you feel about me?” cause discomfort, embarrassment and lead out of equilibrium. A man’s love is manifested in a hundred other nuances, and the words do not reflect the real reality. If a man has not figured out himself and his feelings, not completely confident in his chosen one, the constant questioning destroy the relationship that has just begun to bud.
Women are always a little attention, they are free to express their anger, resentment, joy. Why are men different? Psychologists note that men and women often do not understand perfectly the feelings and thoughts of each other, because most of the strong sex emotionally distanced from the relationship, while many young ladies passionately seek them. The psychology of the relationship between the strong sex and the ladies is such that 80% of the women are “stalkers” and 80% of the men are “distance seekers”. The weaker sex wants to be closer because they felt abandoned in a previous relationship or as a child.
Why do men hide their feelings and emotions?
Men try to keep a safe distance and hide their feelings from women because they fear being dragged into a relationship. Most male distance men act like stalkers at the beginning of a relationship, trying to seduce a lady. The lady’s rejection only exacerbates the tendency to stalk. But given that the woman takes this step for fear of ruining the relationship, rather than consciously, it only pushes the man further away.
The script for future relationships stretches back to childhood. Most boys are afraid of losing their manhood and independence. But mothers often find it difficult to allow their sons to grow up on their own. As a result, boys experience guilt because they are estranged from their mothers.
A young man with this complex, developed in childhood, will avoid relationships with the girl, if she turns out to be demanding, will develop in him a sense of guilt that he ignores her needs, or if he himself is afraid that he will not be able to meet her demands.
In the case of girls, if the father is too close to his daughter or vice versa rejects her, the daughter perceives her mother as a rival, feeling guilty about it and lonely.
Thus, the distancer man flees from commitment and painful dependence, while the stalker lady dreams that the distancer will “rewrite” the script of her relationship with her father. The highest values for the distancer are freedom and independence, and for the stalker – close relationships and partnership.
Author : Practical psychologist Vedmesh N.A.
Speaker of the Medical-Psychological Center “PsychoMed
Crazy (but honest) reasons why men hide their feelings
Inconceptions and assumptions are the real termites of relationships. Sooner or later they “chew up” the brightest and deepest feelings.
Relationships
Have you ever liked a guy, but could not understand how he feels? Or another situation: you know exactly what a young man likes, and he … carefully hides it. We all have been in this situation more than once: trying to decipher what really thinks the subject of sympathy, and just lost in speculation and conjecture. And the biggest question is, “Well, why, why isn’t he saying anything?”
So, in this article, I’m going to talk about a few of the craziest reasons why a guy is hiding his feelings from you.
Note: Most of the time, I’ll run ahead, he does this because of misunderstandings and misconceptions about certain things.
He hides his feelings so he doesn’t lose his power.
It is very important for guys to always be in shape, that is – at the peak of male energy. When he feels strong, feels like a real man, he successfully copes with the most important job: to provide a woman and meet her needs. This is something we men hold very dear.
However, there are times when we get the feeling that we are giving – too much, and we should “slow down” a bit. There are also times when a girl does not respond in any way to what we are doing for her, so the thought creeps in that we are just being used and taken for granted. That’s why men sometimes pull away or prefer not to open up in the hope that if you love, you’ll understand everything yourself.
Another thing to keep in mind is the power struggle between two women and men. On the one hand, this polarity is attractive, but on the other hand, sometimes the sexes are so caught up in the game of “Who’s in charge?” that neither one is willing to “give up. So there is a situation where no one wants to be the first to do something to get closer, so as not to look like a “loser”. In fact, this is one of the main reasons why couples split up. The fact is that reticence and assumptions are the real termites of relationships. Sooner or later they “chew up” the brightest and deepest feelings.
WHAT TO DO: Do not turn a relationship into a power struggle. The male energy is to provide and satisfy the partner. The woman’s energy is to let the man know that he is doing a good job and is appreciated. Only then do men become motivated to try and do even more for the sake of their loved ones.
They are like children: they love when they are praised. A kind word is always nice to the Ego, and what to hide – our self-esteem is determined by how attractive and gorgeous – in the eyes of a woman. What she thought, how she smiled in response to another feat – oh, that’s a real balm for every man!
Doesn’t want to look vulnerable because of his feelings.
I think this pattern of behavior is imposed by society. It literally dictates to guys how they should behave, what words to say, how to act in a relationship with a girl. A little too much – and you already look like a wimp and a sissy in the eyes of the public. That’s why guys prefer not to open up right away: they do not want to seem too soft.
In addition, they sincerely believe that before you talk about your feelings, you should make sure that the girl also cares about them.
Usually a guy opens up after these two things:
- He claims to be perceived as strong, masculine, a do-gooder.
- He gets to know his partner well enough to do what she likes and makes her happy.
WHAT TO DO: Don’t put pressure on the man. Relax. Stop thinking about how the guy really feels and just enjoy life together. Go out, talk, have fun.
If he feels like he’s free, no one’s pressuring or pressuring him with, “Do you even like me a little bit?” he’s bound to open up. We always do.
When guys open up, the spirit of hunting and pleasant excitement disappears
It’s no secret that guys like to feel like hunters. It’s important for them to know that they’ve won their girl, to feel like heroes and winners. We are attracted to everything unexplored. Not only that, it’s also important to feel accepted, wanted.
The logic is that a guy thinks like this: “If your beloved doesn’t know how I feel, but she’s definitely interested, you have to open up little by little, not all at once, otherwise all the fun of the game will disappear, the mystery will disappear. Why lay out all your cards at once and find yourself at the mercy of a woman?”
That’s what most men think.
Here’s how: “I’m not losing my manhood, I’m really invulnerable, I can’t tear myself away from this magical hunt and this beautiful girl, well, isn’t that wonderful!”
However, it’s not just about the guys. A lot depends on you girls. And you need to be aware of that.
WHAT TO DO: If I were you, I wouldn’t rush and push the guy, much less pressure him to open his feelings. Love is proven by actions and deeds under specific circumstances, not by pretty words and vows. Your benchmark is effort and time, which characterizes your boyfriend’s behavior. If he tries and works on the relationship in the beginning, but soon – cools down, perhaps he is not that interested in you.
Of course, as time goes by, stormy feelings become calmer, that’s normal. But if you notice that the attitude toward you has changed somehow suddenly and overnight – it’s something to think about. Real feelings are always an effort over a period of time.
He does not trust you yet.
Quite often the man does not open up for another reason: he is afraid of the consequences, which, in his opinion, will certainly follow the confession.
- You use this against him (“I thought you loved me. That’s what you swore to me last week”).
- You will want him to open up almost daily (if he stops reminding you regularly and with the same passion that he loves and adores you, questions and resentment will follow).
- He will lose his masculine power (because you will know which “buttons” to push and use this knowledge against him).
- You’ll start to tease the guy (e.g., try to make him jealous).
WHAT TO DO: Realize that relationships and dating are a process. Just because you can’t wait to hear that you’re loved and idolized today, and preferably before dinner, doesn’t mean that a man has to do it. He needs time to make sure that what he says doesn’t backfire on him.
And, the saddest part: it is possible that he does not feel anything for you. Yes, it’s painful and unpleasant, but it happens in life. And a lot more often than you think. Just because he smiles and has fun with you doesn’t necessarily mean he’s into you or in love. There has to be a special chemistry, an attraction. Something that, in fact, is elusive and cannot be explained in terms of logic. If this is not there, alas, you are in the friend zone, no more.
So take your time. Don’t push. Just live and enjoy the communication. The time will come – the guy will open up and say those cherished words you’ve been waiting for. And if not … Well, there are a lot of good guys, and your meeting with The One is a little delayed. But it will definitely happen!
